Immortals

Fantasy Thriller Urban Fantasy

Written in response to: "Write a story whose first and last words are the same." as part of Final Destination.

“Joan do you take Evan to be your lawfully wedded husband from this day forward - to have and to hold, in good times and bad, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health; will you love, honor, and cherish him for as long as you both shall live?”

“I do.”

“Evan do you take Joan to be your…..”

Joan looked into Evan’s deep blue eyes, mesmerizing pools of sparkling blue, pulling her in, deeper and deeper, until nothing else mattered or existed. She could swim in those eyes for an eternity.

‘I really do love him,’ she said to herself.’

“……will you love, honor and cherish her for as long as you both shall live?”

“I…..”

Joan stared at Evan. His mouth was open, but frozen in place just like the rest of his body. The priest in front of them was also frozen in place. She looked out into the church, and everyone attending the wedding, family and friends were frozen in time as well. No one in the church was moving.

Then, a woman in the back row of pews stood up, exited the row, and started walking up the center isle toward the front of the church. She was stunning, with long black hair, almond-shaped eyes and flawless olive skin. Joan turned to face her.

——————————

“Joan, now really…. a white dress?” she said with amusement in her voice.

“What are you doing here Cleo” replied Joan angrily. Joan’s dark eyes narrowed as she stood there in her flowing white wedding dress, her short brown hair below her tiara and veil framing her striking face.

“I’m here for Evan of course. You really didn’t think you could hide him from us, did you?”

“You can’t! He’s so young. He doesn’t even……”

“You haven’t told him? remarked Cleo, an evil smile spreading across her face. “He doesn’t even know what he really is, does he?

“He’s not ready to know the truth about his nature.”

“You’ve made it so much easier for me” said Cleo slyly. “When he finds out how you deceived him, he will come over to our way of thinking. He will be one of us.”

“He will never be like you or your kind! Leave now while you still can.”

“Are you threatening me Joan?”

“I’m warning you. Evan is not going anywhere with you. Leave now before this gets ugly!”

“I was hoping you’d say that.” Cleo moved with blinding speed, thrusting her palm out, striking Joan in the chest and hurtling her twenty feet through the air into an altar at the back of the sanctuary. She then flicked her fingers toward Joan sending a materialized giant asp toward her face.

Joan, somewhat dazed, her vision foggy, instinctively clasped her hands in front of her, a silver sword materializing in them. She swung, severing the snake’s head, inches from her face. Joan then pointed the sword at Cleo, a brilliant beam of white light radiating from it and striking Cleo in the face, throwing her back against the front row of pews, blinding her temporarily.

Cleo recovered and throwing both hands forward, sent several poison daggers from thin air flying toward Joan. The sword Joan was holding turned into a triangular blue shield which she held in front of her deflecting the daggers.

Joan rushed toward Cleo, the silver sword now in her hands. Cleo raised her hands to the sky, then thrust them down again. Blackness enveloped them both. Joan stopped, and gripped the hilt tighter, the silver sword starting to glow, the light spreading outwards. Two hands suddenly grasped Joan’s head from behind. Her vision blurred, her mind sinking into an ocean of blackness, deeper and deeper, until she succumbed to the void.

“Gregory, so good of you to show up,” said Cleo scornfully.

“Looks like I got here just in time to save your ass,” said Gregory tauntingly.

“Don’t push your luck,” said Cleo acidly. “Just grab Evan. We need to go”

——————————

Joan woke up with Father Patrick leaning over her.

“Are you alright my child,” he said concerned.

“Yes Father, I’m fine,” she said, sitting up.

The wedding guests were milling about the church trying to figure out what had happened and wondering where Evan had gone to. There was damage to the altar and the front row of pews. The police showed up a little later asking questions that no one could answer and saying they would put out a missing person report on Evan if he wasn’t found at home or in a local bar with cold feet.

‘That’s not going to happen,’ Joan thought to herself. ‘I need to get some help.’

——————————

Joan opened the door of the small church in south Los Angeles and stepped inside. Sunlight from the stained glass windows cast a kaleidoscope of colors on the pews. A priest was at the front of the church arranging items on the altar.

“Can I help you my child?” he asked. Joan walked up to the front of the church.

“Hello Michael.”

“Joan?” said the priest, with surprise in his voice. He stood there in his black pants and shirt and white collar. At six feet four with blue eyes and golden hair he towered over Joan.

“It’s good to see you Michael.”

Michael smiled. “It’s good to see you too Joan.” They came together and embraced as friends.

“I need your help Michael,” she said quietly.

Michael nodded. “Of course Joan,” he said firmly. “Come with me.”

——————————

As Michael led her from the sanctuary to the rectory next door, Joan remembered the last time she had seen Michael, eighty years before, at the end of the war.

The world war had not only devastated the nations of the world, but the immortals were devastated as well. Before the war they numbered more than fifty worldwide, but after the war, less than a dozen remained. They were essentially immortal, except for the fact, that immortals could kill other immortals.

When the war had started, those that saw humanity as a race to be subjugated and ruled, joined the Axis of Evil, seeking to control it’s leaders after the war, thus controlling mankind. Others, like Michael and myself, Joan reminisced, joined the Allies to help preserve mankind’s freedoms of choice and self determination.

There were many bloody battles between immortals during the war, and when it was clear that the Allies would win, the remaining Axis immortals scattered throughout the world. The few of us that’s remained on the Allies side, decided to disperse as well when the war was over, Joan remembered.

But now, a new immortal had emerged — something that only happened on average every hundred years or so — and I had been close enough to sense the power awakening in Evan, and found him, thought Joan, and I had fallen in love with him — something that hadn’t happened to me in over two hundred years.

——————————

Michael and Joan sat in comfy chairs across from each other in the rectory, a hot cup of tea in their hands.

“Tell me what’s going on Joan,” asked Michael.

“There’s been an emergence recently,” Joan began. “I found him and made contact, with the idea of monitoring his progress, and to be there, when he was ready to know the truth”. Joan paused as tears started welling up in her eyes.

“His name is Evan, and I didn’t mean to, but I fell in love with him. We were getting married a few days ago when Cleo showed up at the wedding ceremony. She had come for Evan. We fought, but she had help. I think it was Gregory. When I woke up they were gone and so was Evan. They’re going to try and turn him to their side and I’m afraid if they can’t they’re going to kill him.”

“Holy mother of god,” exclaimed Michael. “Do you have any idea where they may have taken him?”

“No, I don’t. That’s one of the reasons I came to you. I was hoping with your network of contacts you might be able to help me locate them.”

“We will find them Joan,” Michael stated flatly, “and when we do, we’ll get Evan back. I promise you that.”

“Thank you Michael. I knew I could count on you.”

——————————

Evan awoke disoriented. Last thing he remembered was standing at the altar with Joan exchanging their wedding vows. He was lying in a large bed in a luxurious bedroom.

There was a knock at the door, the door opened, and in stepped a beautiful young woman with long black hair and olive skin.

“I hope your accommodations are acceptable,” she said.

“Where am I?” Evan demanded. “How did I get here, and where is Joan?”

“Evan, my name is Cleo. We rescued you and brought you here for your own safety. Joan is not what she appears to be. You were in grave danger.”

“What are you saying? We were being married. We love each other!” Cleo approached Evan with sadness in her eyes.

“I’m sorry Evan, but that’s not why Joan was marrying you,” she said quietly.

“I don’t understand,” said Evan pleadingly. “None of this makes any sense.”

“I know, it’s a lot to take in, but I will answer all of your questions. Why don’t you get cleaned up and then come downstairs. I will explain everything over dinner,” said Cleo kindly.

——————————

Joan answered the phone. It was Michael.

“We found them!” Michael exclaimed exuberantly. “They’re at a large estate in the Hamptons. Meet me at the airport in an hour. They’ll be a plane waiting for us.”

——————————

When Evan came down to dinner Cleo was waiting for him at a large mahogany table in a classical dining room. Evan sat down across from her. The table was set with elegant dinnerware and the chef was bringing in the opening courses of the meal.

“You said you would explain everything to me,” said Evan. “I’m listening.”

“Well, let me start by saying that what I’m about to tell you is going to be hard to believe. But it’s all true, and I can prove it.” Cleo leaned in a little as she spoke.

“Joan is not what she appears to be. She is what we call an immortal. She is over five hundred years old and has inhuman powers and abilities.”

“That’s ridiculous. Do don’t expect me to believe that?”

“Look at this picture” said Cleo. She handed Evan an old newspaper article. It was a picture of General Douglas MacArthur at the signing of Japan’s surrender in 1945 aboard the USS Missouri.

“Look to the right of General MacArthur,” directed Cleo.

Evan looked at the small group of people in the background behind General MacArthur. There, second from the left was a woman with a striking face. Joan’s face! The newspaper was old and faded and in black and white, but it was definitely Joan’s face. Evan felt a little sick as he looked at the date of the newspaper — September 3rd, 1945.

“How is this possible,” Evan pleaded. “That was eighty years ago and Joan hasn’t aged at all, she still look the same!”

“Like I said, Joan is an immortal,” explained Cleo. “She doesn’t age. In five hundred years she will still look exactly the same.”

“Why should I believe you? It’s probably someone who just looks like her. And immortals, they can’t be real. They just can’t.”

“Oh, they are,” stated Cleo. “I know, because I’m one.” Cleo opened her hand, a black cloud emerging. She motioned her hand forward and the cloud drifted over to Evan. Cleo flicked her fingers and the cloud formed into the shape of a black cat. The cat laid down on the table next to Evan’s hand and began purring. Evan’s eyes were wide in shock as he unconsciously reached out and started petting the cat.

“It’s real,” he said, his voice shaking.

“Only as long as I want it to be,” retorted Cleo. She snapped her fingers and the cat dissolved into a fine mist. Evan just sat there staring into space for a minute.

“So you and Joan are immortals,” Evan stated slowly, “but why should I trust you and not her?”

“Because I’m the one whose telling you the truth, not hiding it from you.”

——————————

Michael and Joan slipped over the brick wall and made their way to the back of the estate. There were expansive manicured grounds and a large patio attached to the house.

“There,” said Michael, pointing to the French doors on the patio. Michael and Joan approached the doors. Michael put his hand by the door handle, rubbing his thumb and forefinger together. There was a faint click as the door unlocked. Carefully and quietly they stepped inside.

They were in a great room, large brick fireplace in the corner, a bar on the far wall, formal dining room to the right and a study to the left. A wide hallway led toward the front of the house. There was no one in sight. Michael motioned toward the hallway and they quietly crept toward it.

“You shouldn’t have come,” warned a voice from the dining room, as Cleo stepped into view.

“Yet, here they are,” added Gregory as he appeared in the doorway to the study.

“Where’s Evan,” demanded Joan, as Michael and Joan took defensive stances facing the two.

“He wants nothing to do with you,” purred Cleo, “now that he knows the truth about you.”

“We’ll see about that,” challenged Joan.

“No you won’t,” spat Cleo, as she thrust her palms forward. Two large male lions materialized and rushed toward Joan, roaring ferociously. At the same time Gregory began swirling his hands in the air, the space around Michael shifting and spinning, black, then white, then black, rotating faster and faster. Michael becoming disoriented and queasy, barely able to keep his feet.

Joan thrust her right hand forward, the silver sword appearing just as the massive lion arrived, burying itself to the hilt in the beast’s chest. The blue shield materializing on her left arm taking the blow from the charge of the second lion, driving her to the ground and on her back. Joan struggled to get up, pinned under nine hundred pounds of predatory beasts, one impaled on her sword, the other clawing at her from behind the shield.

Michael’s vision was blurring and spinning as he felt two hands on his head and everything started to go black. An ember deep inside Michael flared and he began to glow, golden armor materializing on his body, then a blinding white light burst from his armor throwing Gregory across the room and into the fireplace, smashing the bricks, Gregory slumping down unconscious.

Joan screamed in rage and with a surge of power, threw both lions off of her. She slammed her shield into the attacking lion’s head, stunning it momentarily as she yanked her sword from the others dead body, swinging it and severing the stunned lion’s head from it’s body.

Joan got to her feet, and her and Michael charged toward Cleo, a glowing golden sword appearing in Michael’s two hands.

Lightning then erupted from the hallway striking Joan and Michael, freezing them in place, their bodies convulsing spasmodically. A tall powerfully built man with flowing white hair and classical features walked into the room, lightning surging from his fingertips. His piercing blue eyes emanating hate as he continued the electrocutions.

“What’s going on,” gasped Evan, as he entered the room surveying the scene.

“Joan! What are you doing to Joan? cried Evan.

“She’s getting what she deserves,” hissed Cleo venomously.

Joan and Michael were convulsing more rapidly, their skin turning dark in spots, the smell of burning flesh becoming evident as the onslaught of lightning accelerated.

“NO!… NO!… STOP IT!” screamed Evan. A wave of energy swept out from Evan’s body, an expanding ball of plasma, a force field of incredible power, slamming into everyone, throwing them all into the walls of the room.

Michael was first to get up, glowing golden sword in hand, advancing on the powerful white haired man, just as he was unleashing more lightning from his fingertips. Michael’s sword caught the lightning and began glowing brighter and brighter as it absorbed it.

Michael swung a vicious overhand slash, the white haired man raising his left hand, a circular golden shield materializing in his hand moments before impact. The golden sword cleaving the shield in two, delivering a shattering blow to the arm and opening a severe gash in his side, driving the white haired man to his knees.

Michael pulled back and swung the final death blow, the white haired man’s eyes seething with contempt, lightning flashing in them, and then…. he vanished, the sword burying itself in the floor.

——————————

Evan rushed over to Joan lying on the floor. “Joan, are you okay?” Evan asked anxiously.

“Thanks to you,” said Joan. “You saved us.”

“I don’t understand,” said Evan, “I don’t know what happened.”

“You are an immortal Evan,” explained Joan, “just like me. I should have told you sooner, but I didn’t think you were ready.”

“Me….. an immortal?”

“I know it’s a lot to take in, but I’ll explain everything,” said Joan, and I want you to know…. that I really do love you Evan.”

“I love you too Joan.”

——————————

Evan do you take Joan to be your lawfully wedded wife from this day forward - to have and to hold, in good times and bad, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health; will you love, honor, and cherish her for as long as you both shall live?”

“I do.”

“I now pronounce you man and wife” said Michael with a smile, “You may now kiss the bride.” Evan and Joan embraced and kissed, their lives as husband and wife and fellow immortals just beginning.

Posted Mar 14, 2026
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9 likes 10 comments

Mike Weiland
14:28 Mar 16, 2026

Thanks Natasha for the great comments. Why was Evan frozen? I’m going with your explanation. LOL

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Mike Weiland
20:47 Mar 19, 2026

Thanks Marjolein for your great comments. I agree with you that a little more emotional exploration and depth would improve the story. I will keep that in mind as I continue my writing.

Reply

Marjolein Greebe
20:06 Mar 19, 2026

I liked the restraint in this piece, especially in the way the “wedded husband” line is used—it lands quietly but effectively. The tone feels controlled and consistent throughout, which works well for the story.
For me, I was most drawn to the subtle emotional layer underneath. I found myself wondering what would happen if that layer was allowed just a fraction more space on the page.
Overall, this felt like a thoughtful and carefully handled story—calm on the surface, with something more moving underneath.

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Mike Weiland
16:31 Mar 19, 2026

Thanks Eric for the input. I never paid much attention in English class when I was back in school. I think I figured out one of my major punctuation mistakes and I went back in and corrected it. I appreciate your help and comments. I would still get all my work edited if I decided to publish my stories in the future though.

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Eric Manske
14:02 Mar 19, 2026

Lots of action and tension here. This feels like it could be expanded into a screenplay. I would recommend having someone go over it for quick editing, if these are ever planned for publication. I noticed several punctuation errors, but I assume these would be cleaned up on a rewrite.

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Mike Weiland
03:02 Mar 18, 2026

Thank you so much Rebecca for the detailed comments. Glad to hear you enjoyed it.

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Rebecca Lewis
18:14 Mar 17, 2026

This is a strong, cinematic piece. It feels like the opening episode of a series more than a short story, which is a good thing. The concept works, the visuals are clear, and the core conflict is solid. The wedding scene at the start is the strongest part. The time freeze and Cleo walking up the aisle is a great hook — it pulls you in and sets the tone fast. That whole sequence feels very natural and engaging. The core dynamic between Joan, Cleo, and Evan works well too. You’ve got a clear push and pull there — love vs truth vs control — and that gives the story a strong backbone. It reads like the start of a series, not just a one-off story.

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Natasha London
13:07 Mar 16, 2026

Wow, the visuals here. Lots of action!
I liked the twist with Evan. I have to wonder exactly how much force it takes to kill an immortal, haha! My question is: if Evan was an immortal as well, why was he frozen along with everyone else in the church in the beginning? Was it simply that his powers were not yet awakened?
Overall, nice story!

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Mike Weiland
17:24 Mar 14, 2026

Thanks Helen. I’m glad you enjoyed it. It was a lot of fun to write this one.

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Helen A Howard
17:10 Mar 14, 2026

An unexpected start to married life - to say the least. Something both wonderful and terrifying about immortality. I can see these two finding a way to coast through every hurdle life throws their way. Enjoyable.

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