Under a Killing Sky

When you play with fire, you going to get burned.

That’s what my old man told me, but I never figured I’d be living it.

Here I am wondering if I’d be better off getting killed like my own family and the rest of people who lived in my neighborhood. Sometimes surviving isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be as I walk along this deserted highway, my bag slung over my shoulder under the killing sky.

It all started eight days ago when trucks filled with army munitions pulled into an abandoned track of land where a base was constructed during World War II. When the war was over, the army vacated the base due to the cost of maintenance and supplies. My kids used to ride their four wheelers through the empty streets, kicking up the desert dust. I don’t even remember the name of the base, but it was a little south of Bakersfield.

“How’s it going, Dale?” My neighbor asked as he passed by my house.

“Not bad, Greg.” I shook my head as I sat in a chair on the porch.

“Have you caught wind of what they’re doing on that old army base?” He sniffed as he put his foot on one of the concrete porch steps.

“Can’t say I have.” I shrugged as I leaned back. “Why doncha pop a squat.” I offered the empty chair next to me.

“Thank ya kindly.” He sat in the chair as I sipped on my iced tea.

“So, what’s up?” I shrugged a shoulder.

“According to my brother Brian, they are testing nukes in the hills.” He leaned back and let his feet dangle over the edge of the porch.

“What do you suppose they’re gonna do with them?” I tilted my baseball cap to the back of my head.

“I haven’t the foggiest.” He shook his head and frowned. “It makes me nervous. I was in the army once you know.”

“So you’ve told me on occasion.” I smiled. “What does your brother think?”

“He works out in that area ya know for the Bakersfield Post Office.” Greg looked around as if we were having a top-secret chat. “He says something is going on for sure.”

“Something is always going on.” I chuckled, “What does he suppose it could be?”

“He’s kind of dull whitted. He just thinks they’re gonna open the base again. Army don’t do nothing unless they have an ulterior motive.”

I just shrugged. People are always suspicious of the government.

Not a single vehicle has passed me while I have been walking the Antelope Freeway towards the San Fernando Valley. There ain’t nothing out in these parts except sage brush and tumbleweeds. The High Desert will kill any living that dares to show itself to the hot sun. Predator and prey don’t dare come out until the sun goes down.

That was Palmdale over there. It doesn’t look as if there’s anyone left. I may be the only living soul who survived. That thought alone is very disheartening. Most folks would think themselves fortunate living isolated from other people, but let me tell you, it gets pretty lonely after just a couple of days on this deserted highway.

There is an empty service station up head off the side of the road. Each step I take, I hear a crunch as if I am walking on glass. When I hear it, I get this uneasy feeling after when I’ve seen in the past few days.

“Hello?” I stick my head in the open door.

No one answers. The cash register is open and there are bills waving in the slight breeze, but all that cash is worthless to me. Nonetheless, I stuff some of the money into my jeans pocket in case just over the hill leading to the San Fernando Valley, there are survivors.

Tears fill my eyes as I clean out the drawer. The sun is the color of blood as it begins to set in between the hills and mesas. There was a time when I would marvel at such a brilliant sunset, but now things have changed. I will never again appreciate the colors like I used to.

It’s been three days now. Three days since there was a flash that changed the world.

“Dale, what are all those jet plans doing overhead?” Debbie my wife asks as she brings me a cold beer as I grill our steaks and a couple hot dogs for Wayne our youngest. I shrug offering an explanation, “Maybe they’re having an air show.”

Debbie scrunches her face at my flimsy explanation as she puts the beer on the table next to me within reach. I no sooner put the refreshing beer to my lips when I see the flash.

“Everyone into the basement. NOW!” I point as I see the mushroom shaped cloud form an ominous shadow near the hills. “C’mon Deb, Sissy, Jason, and Wayne.”

“What is it dad?” Jason asks with his baseball cap pushed to the back of his head.

“No time for questions, bud.” I order him to go with the others, “Just get in the basement.”

The eerie sounds sirens wailing, warning us to take cover.

“Dad, I’m scared.” Sissy whines as Debbie takes her hand.

“C’mon sweetie.” Debbie nearly lifts our child off her feet.

Abandoning the grill, I look around to make sure all the kids are headed inside with Debbie. Satisfied, I begin to follow them to the basement

“Oh God.” I hear Greg howling as he exits his car. In his haste to get inside, he falls. It will be the last time I see him.

There is a wind coming from the direction of the mushroom cloud.

“Everyone accounted for?” I ask as I slam the door behind me. The cellar may not be enough to save us, but it’s all we got at the moment. We have a sink where we can access water. The walls are thick cement and there are no windows that can shatter. I am feeling better about our situation.

“I forgot Mr. Peepers.” Wayne says in a panic. Without warning, Wayne opens the door. I can hear the howl of the wind outside. Wayne leaves the basement.

“Noooo!” Debbie screams and chases after him. I will not see either of them, just their shadows on the garage wall.

There is a big bang as the walls of our home fold on top of us as we huddle together in the basement.

What is that sound, I wonder and then I identify it as people screaming. I put my hands over my ears to block out the sound but even doing that does not shut it out.

Sissy is in tears, “I want mom.”

“Stay here.” I reached out using my arm to block her from leaving.

“I hate you.” Her face is red, covered in snot from crying.

“Dad, are we going to be okay?” Jason asks with his eyes open wide.

“We just have to stay here until this all passes.” I take a deep breath and close my eyes. There is more banging as the atomic wind continues to blow taking down buildings and houses in the area.

With my pockets stuffed with legal tender, I break open a vending machine with a wrench and remove some sodas.

On the hydraulic rack is the remains of a Ford Explorer. The car is covered with that dust that is radioactive. I consider taking the car anyway, but decide against it since I have witnessed what the radiation is capable of doing.

“Is it over?” Jason asked as he cracked open the basement door as Sissy peered over his shoulder.

There was no wind and it was calm.

“You may leave but just be careful.” I warned both of them with a shake of my finger. As I stepped into the open, I saw the devastation was total.Not a single home was left standing. Some of the vehicles parked in the street had been melted to the ground.

“Hey look, the swing set is still standing.” Sissy ran to her favorite swing, but when her hand came in contact with the swing, she screamed and burst into flames. The horror of watching my daughter cremated right in front of my eyes, was more than I could handle. Falling to my knees, I vomited into what was left of my lawn.

“Dad! Dad!” Jason was by my side, “Sissy is gone.”

“I know.” I vomited some more.

“Is everybody…” He looked all around at what once was out neighborhood.

“It appears so.” I wiped my mouth with my sleeve.

“What are we going to do?” He gasped.

“We are going to spend the night in the basement and when we wake up, we are going to see if there are any more survivors.” I took a deep breath, but as I looked around, I began to seriously doubt there would be any survivors.

“All my things…” He shook his head as tears rolled down his cheeks.

Things? Two of his siblings and his mother had perished. Standing in my yard, I could see that things meant so very little.

“Jason, you go to the basement while I have a look around.” I began to walk down the driveway.

“I want to go with you.” He wiped his tears.

“I’d rather stay so I know you’re safe.” I shook my head.

“What difference does it make, dad? I don’t want to be by myself after this.” He held out his hand over the smoldering ruins. He was right.

“Alright, but don’t go running off.” I nodded.

“Running off? Seriously dad.” He chucked as we walked together down Greentree Avenue what used to be the street we lived on.

For as far as my eyes could see, there was no one else. As darkness crept in, I began to become wary of the creatures returning to claim their nocturnal domain. From a distance, I could hear coyotes howling as I felt my legs grow weary. I had experiences with Mojave Green Rattlesnakes that were no pleasant. Once I had pissed off one of them hanging out in the garage a few years ago.

The air was cooler, perfect for hunting prey. If I didn’t know any better, I would think everything out here was the way it should be, but that was so deceiving. There were places on the road that were warm as I could feel it through the soles of my shoes as I continued to walk. I also knew that the radiation was still a danger, but I had little choice.

“What happened?” I heard a voice inside my head ask.

When I was growing up, the teacher would go over the “Duck ‘n’ Cover” drills where we’d get under our desks and pretend we were going through a nuclear attack, but the truth is our desks would not save our lives. It was a futile exercise and we all knew it. We all lived in the shadow of the mushroom cloud.

How many times had we come close to nuclear annihilation? How many people in the position of leadership had been tempted to push the button? Why today? What caused all this? My wife and our three children gone. I had no desire to be alone. If I didn’t find another human being, I was going to walk into the ocean and let the tide take me. Or maybe I’d fall victim to the killing sun.

“Dad, wait up.” Jason jogged to catch up to me. He was exhausted already. It was early in the morning and already the sun beat down on us as we moved down Highway 14.

“Alright.” I paused to let him catch up.

“Can we find somewhere to rest?” He asked putting his hands on his knees trying to catch his breath.

“I don’t want to rest.” I told him, “Just in case we see another survivor.”

“I get it, but I am feeling like I’m gonna pass out.” He closed his eyes.

“You can’t pass out.” I shook my head, “I’m not strong enough to carry you anymore.”

“If we find some place on the highway…”

“We won’t. Most of the places along the highway are no more.” I shrugged, “And the sun is not about to get any cooler.”

“I’m thirsty.” He complained.

“Do you see any water?” I held out my arms upon the barren landscape. “You have a small bottle. Drink it sparingly.”

“It’s warm going on hot.” He sighed.

“Warm is still wet.” I was getting frustrated with him. He had never ever gone without as long as his mother was there. Now she wasn’t and he was bitching that the sun was hot and the drinking water was warm. He was spoiled. We have given him everything he needed and when we could no longer fill his needs, he was struggling. Just looking at his face made me angry. Tell me Jason, what do you want from me?!”

My voice echoed in the empty place we were in.

“I don’t know.” He answered bitterly, his face twisted and contorted.

There was no comfort here. The fact was clear; we’d both be better off dead like all the others. Why did they leave us alone in this stumbling across this dead land? This poison landscape?

“Water!” He yelled and ran off the road over a slight incline.

I saw it too, glistening in the sun, a blue tint and promise of much needed refreshment. Before I could stop him, Jason put his face into the small pond. Before I could do anything, he emerged his face into the water. The next thing I heard was a piercing scream as he pulled his face from the water.

By that time, I had reached him. The skin on his face was scarlet red.

“Ah IT BURNS!” His scream was echoing as he thrashed around in the dirt. His skin had severe burns from the radiation still in the pond water. There was nothing I could do. Even pouring the rest of my drinking water on his burning shin could not soothe his pain. I held him cradled in my arms until he stopped breathing. Now I was all alone.

I had watched my wife, and three children die ghastly deaths to the point when I found myself envious that they had left me behind.

Theat was two days ago, and I still have not found a single survivor. This morning I reached the San Fernando Valley. It is strange, let me tell you to see the Los Angeles freeway completely deserted. What is also mind-boggling is the silence I am experiencing. I still have no idea what caused this to happen, because I have not seen anyone to tell me what took place. And why. When I began my descent on Highway 14, I let out a couple of vociferous shouts and only heard my own echo answer me back along with the emptiness of the wind under the killing sun sky.