New Beginnings

It was just another day. I had just finished my shift at TJ Maxx and was waiting at the bus stop to get back home. It was raining heavily and I cursed myself for wearing trainers instead of rain boots as I fidgeted from the cold and the impatience of waiting for the bus. I couldn’t wait to get home and get into my warm pajamas.

These days, it felt like the only good thing in my life was that brief moment when I got out of my day clothes and got into those pajamas. Ever since my mother died two years ago, my life felt like it was going downhill. I had to drop out of school and the part-time job I had for some extra money became a full-time job for survival. I lost my friends because I couldn’t bother making any effort and their patience had finally run out. And you know what? I was happy. Not happy as in joyful, happy as in, I can finally be miserable in peace.

These past two weeks though felt a little tougher. It was around this time that I had lost her. We were out shopping and I had insisted that we stop at that little Italian restaurant I had discovered with my friends. It was a hidden gem and it had the best lasagna, which was my mom’s favorite. I told her it would be my treat as I had just received my first paycheck. She resisted at first but she finally caved and let me treat her. She deserved to be treated, she had practically raised me herself. I felt so grown up. I guess I was technically an adult at the time, having been eighteen years old. But she didn’t feel that way, in fact she tried her best to keep me as her little girl and I was completely happy with that. Well look at me now, mom. I didn't grow up, not really, but here I am all alone.

Bitter tears welled up in my eyes as I angrily held them in. This world is unfair. The bus should’ve been here already. I checked the app for any notifications and saw that the bus was going to be delayed by twenty minutes. Unbelievable, I muttered to myself. To make matters worse, my battery was at ten percent battery. I decided a thirty minute walk was better than a twenty minute stand in the cold, despite the rain and my wet trainers.

The sky was getting darker and darker as I walked. So I walked faster and faster, wary of the people around me. I checked my maps as I was always messing up directions, which was one of the few things I had inherited from my mom. The rest came from my dad.

I lost my dad when I was very young. I couldn’t really remember much about him, and my mother didn’t like speaking about him, even though I tried my best to get any information I could about him. She’d always shut me down quickly and I knew it was a sore subject for her, so I’d let her. And despite the deep desire to know my dad, she was enough for me.

As I followed the directions, it took me into an empty alleyway. It was dark and there were no sounds, except for the pattering rain on the concrete and the faint sounds of cars and buses from nearby streets. I walked rapidly. It was in the middle of the alleyway that I heard footsteps behind me. They were heavy and almost clumsy. I walked as fast as I could without running, but the footsteps did the same. I suddenly felt hot, despite the cold, and sweat began to bead on my face and neck.

Keeping my breath in check, I continued as fast as I could. But the voice yelled at me, “Hey girl, slow down, why are you running?” And he snickered. I felt my heart beat so fast. His voice was deep and I could tell that he was at least twice my size. From pure instinct, I started running. I ran and ran like fucking Forrest Gump. “After her!” Screamed the man, as if desperate not to let his prey get away. There were two men, not one as I had initially thought. And they laughed. They laughed, as if my fear was the funniest joke they’ve ever heard. I felt so out of shape, I was panting so hard and I didn’t think I’d ever run so fast in my life. And just when I thought I had made it to the busy street, I tripped. Right then and there, I knew it was over for me. Whatever those fuckers had planned, I didn’t think I would be able to stop them. I felt frozen in fear, so frozen in fact that I wasn’t able to get up and I kept my face buried in my hands. I guessed this was where it would end. I began a prayer in my head.

“Get the fuck out of our way old man, this is none of your business,” said the other man.

I looked up, confused, and as if by a miracle, a third man stood in front of me, with his back towards me. He didn’t budge nor respond to their threat. “We said, get the fuck out of our way, or else,” the first man threated again. My savior, at least my savior in this moment, looked like he opened his coat and revealed something because the two men quickly scrambled away.

After making sure they were gone, he turned back to me, his face a shining light in the dark street. He held out his hand, gently, and I took it and he helped steady me up. All the time, I couldn’t stop looking at his face. Something inside me felt strange. I couldn’t pinpoint what it was but he felt so familiar and my hand refused to let go of his.

I didn’t know his face, but his presence felt familiar and there was something in his eyes that called to me, as if calling me home. “Have we met?” I asked.