Home and back again

Home is an interesting thing. Some people’s home is a house. Some people have an apartment for a home. Some people call the underside of a bridge home. Home is a state of mind, not a place. And finding that state of mind, for some, can be impossible.

Take Rachel for example.

Rachel doesn’t like to go home – which happens to be an apartment. She prefers the quiet sanctity of the office, for all its flaws as well as its charm. Rachel doesn’t find that she necessarily has to even be working while at the office. For instance, there is coffee in the kitchen, as well as snacks and treats. There is a full gym downstairs, complete with shower and bath facilities. There is a shop across the street that sells the kind of food that Rachel likes. When in an especially good mood, Rachel even patronizes the coffee shop connected to the gym. All in all, the office may as well be her home away from well, the apartment that is, to be fair, two blocks down the street.

Rachel hasn’t done much traveling either. Having grown up in the city, she’s probably only left the main island once, and by mistake. Now, at 22, she’s got a cozy little apartment that is equidistant from her college and her place of work. There is no need to go anywhere at all when you have it all within walking distance. And Rachel is quite aware that this is normal for most people in the world. However, for Rachel, her brain itches to be anywhere but inside the concrete walls of her city for once.

She’s felt trapped, lately, all because of the amount of pressure she’s been under with school, the internship, and friends. She has almost no time to do anything other than a handful of self-care activities, maybe once or twice a week. Something has got to give and that something is her sanity. Not give out but give in to the fact that she needs a break. Rachel then decided that what was best for her was not to continue to bang her head against the proverbial wall, but to let go and breathe for a moment. Of course, with school that comes with timing.

These last few weeks Rachel has been studying and preparing for finals week. Seven courses as well as the internship all have excessive deadlines and they’re all at once. Much like real life, things just have to happen all at once. Now, with one day before finals begin, she was pulling another all-nighter studying the brain chemistry of dolphins while also preparing for her trip to the Rockies. Seven days until she leaves, and she can’t be more stoked.

Putting down the dolphin book for a moment, Rachel stretches out her arms and stands up from her desk. She looks around the room at various desks all shoved up against one another, head-to-head, making corporate America look eerily similar to sweatshop layouts – only with more tech and less sewing machines. The lights on the desks were all off aside from hers, one of the only solitary light sources in the building. Of course, in the middle of New York City, you don’t really need the lights on in the office at night.

Rachel moves to the window and looks down. Cars honk and dodge through the streets as rain pelts the ground softly. Looking at her hands, she takes one of the parked cars between her thumb and forefinger.

“So tiny” she says, sizing the car up like a small bug. “Aren’t we all just so tiny anyway?” She sighs and looks up. The moon shares the skyline with a thousand rooftops. “Imagine. Space. Ha!”

Rachel turns back to her desk and begins to pack up her retro JanSport backpack when she hears a clashing noise somewhere in the distance. Sirens and horns can be heard outside, but this sound was inside.

Looking in the direction of the sound, she sees nothing.

“Hello?”

No one responds.

“Is anyone there?”

Still, no response.

“Huh, must have been the A/C,” Rachel moves to put her backpack on when she hears the sound again, this time closer.

“Hello?” her heart is thumping as she looks around, trying to find the source of the sound.

Another crash, this time behind her. “Who the hell is there? I know Jiu-Jitsu!” She says, only somewhat confidently.

“Behind you” a voice from behind her says.

“Oh god!” Rachel spins around, fist first, narrowly missing the strange man standing behind her, who ducks just in time to save his face.

“Whoa! I come in peace!” The stranger laughs, but the laugh sounds mechanical and fake to Rachel.

“How do I not believe that? Who are you and how did you get in here?” She backs up with her hands up, providing plenty of space between her and whoever this dude was.

“I’m Sam. I, uh, kind of work here.” Sam says, scratching his head and shrugging his shoulders.

“Sam. How come I’ve never heard of you, Sam?” Rachel puts the last Sam into air quotes. “I’ve worked here for six months. I’ve gotten coffee for nearly every employee here. I’ve never gotten you coffee before!” She continues to back away from Sam.

“Oh, well, I don’t come in often. I usually work from home.” Sam drops his hands and puts on a soft smile. “I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“Startle? You scared the shit out of me.” Rachel has moved her backpack off her back and now holds it in one hand, gripped to swing at a moment’s notice. “Who moves around like that? I didn’t see you until you were right behind me!”

“Yeah, sorry, I’m really awkward around huma- people. I’m really… uncomfortable!” Sam crosses his arms, “yeah, that’s what it is, I’m uncomfortable. That’s why I work from home so often!” Sam smiles and nods his head. “Yep, that’s me. Tell me about yourself!”

“That’s you?” Rachel’s face contorts into disbelief. “Tell you about myself? What are you smokin’ bro? I don’t want to get to know you.” Rachel turns and heads for the elevator banks. “And I’ll just be going now.”

“Rachel, wait,” Sam calls out to Rachel.

“No way, dude, I don’t even know … wait a second,” Rachel stops two steps before the elevator switch and turns back to Sam, “how did you know my name?” Her eyes narrowing on this all-too-suspicious character.

“Oh I know more than your name, Rachel.” Sam smiles, opening his arms. “But it’s like I said, I come in peace!”

“Okay, guy,” Rachel snorts, “who are you, Mork? Oh wait, I shouldn’t assume… Mindy?”

“For someone so young, I wouldn’t have expected you to know Mork and Mindy. I suppose I don’t know that much about you. Just what you’ve posted online.”

“Oh, yeah, I don’t really post about my love of Robin Williams. That’s for me.”

“You see, we’re getting along swell.” Sam smiles.

“Stop it! What do you want with me?” Rachel stomps her boot to the ground.

“I may not be Mork, but I am a visitor. And from what I’ve seen, you’re the one I want to take with me on an interstellar trip around the universe!” Sam throws his arms wide and a shower of what looks to be projected stars emits from his hands. “I could show you some crazy stuff, Rachel.”

Rachel, rolling back in shock, stares at the starscape bewildered. She looks to Sam, who’s eyes are no longer pale green, but bright white and glowing. “My god am I dreaming right now?” Rachel rubs her eyes and looks back to Sam, still holding a small galaxy in his hands. “And I’m sorry but did you just offer to Dr. Who me?”

“Dr. … who?”

“Yes.”

“What?”

“Huh?”

“What doctor?”

“Dr. Who!”

“Who?”

Rachel throws her hands in the air dramatically. “Oh, I give up!” She shakes her head. “No, I do not want to travel around the universe with you!”

Sam’s galaxy falls to the ground as the light sputters out. “Don’t want to go? But why not?”

Rachel takes a step toward Sam. “Oh so many reasons. But let’s start with the fact that I have finals this week? And, even if you were a space alien with a tiny telephone booth that transformed into a spaceship and carted me around the universe, what makes you think I’m worthy of all that?” Rachel crosses her arms.

Sam taps his finger on his chin as he thinks, “Well, that’s a good point. I just thought you were cute and chose you because you seemed kind of nerdy. Thought you might like the space thing.”

Rachel shakes her head “No. Nope, not going to happen.” She looks back to Sam, “I’m sorry, I’m just not interested. Plus, I have planned a trip to Colorado. Gonna’ hike in the mountains. No time to go galaxy hopping.”

“No time to go galaxy hopping?” Sam stares at Rachel with an open mouth. “What… I’ve never… No one has ever chosen hiking the mountains over hiking the universe. That’s wild.” He shakes his head in disbelief.

“Sorry, dude, I’ve been planning this trip for months.” Rachel shrugs her shoulders ever so slightly. “Not to mention, it’s quiet. I can only imagine the type of chaos going with you would entail. I’m good.”

“You’re good? You’re good!” Sam throws his hands up. “Okay! No worries! There are plenty of fish in the sea, Rachel!” Sam turns around and begins to walk away before turning back and saying “But it’s not a telephone booth, it’s a Cybertruck. Thank you very much.” And with that, Sam dissipates into thin air.

Rachel stares blankly to where Sam disappeared. Throwing her backpack over her shoulder and turning to the elevator button, she laughs out loud. “Men are the same no matter what galaxy they’re in.”

She pushes the down button, looks up, and waits for the elevator to come. Space might be nice, but at the end of the day, it can’t replace home.