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Weekly Contest #367
They say ya bleed harder from the head than anywhere else but, for a softy like me, I say it’s got to be the heart where you pump the red juice from the worst when ya get cut open. Because right now, I barely feel whatever’s pouring down my mug. I’m more concerned about the crocodile tears welling up in the corners of old Auntie Shelly’s eyes than about my own crap condition. She can’t let them spill over, of course. Wouldn’t want that mascara runnin’. Got to look good if the news crews show up. It isn’t often that a firetruck t-bones a guy ...
Weekly Contest #365
For real, eulogizing one of the homies, one of the greatest performers I’ve ever seen take a stage, is probably an honor that should’ve been reserved for a better man than me. And while it is an honor, it is simultaneously a tremendous tragedy. It’s one of those things where you wonder what others will have to say about you, yourself, once your time has come and gone; but you’re mostly relieved that you’ll never have to hear any of it.Oh, it’d be too sad.Things I don’t want known about me are going to be exposed.Only God knows what.But Shiz ...
Weekly Contest #362
One pound of white asparagus Five ounces of porcini mushrooms Five ounces of golden chanterelles Four cups of water One cup of milk Butter, salt, black pepper, and onion powder to taste One migraine and a heaping helping of nausea Carla held the tanned and wrinkled scrap of paper her grandmother had always promised would one day be hers. It never seemed like much of a gift or reward. In the kitchen, here today, it felt like a punishment. A lifetime sentence. Carla groaned as she walked towards the cabinet. She rummaged through the rack of sp...
Weekly Contest #361
Mrs. Lawson stomped down the steps in front of her hilltop mansion. “I ain’t going!”It had been so long since I’d heard that voice. I was reminded of the last time I had, almost a decade ago, when Mrs. Lawson had called to tell me, “Your services are no longer needed.” Having worked for Mr. Lawson for almost twenty years, I was shocked when I was let go, but not as much as I was shocked to hear that the Lawsons were suddenly in need of my services, now.“Come along, dear,” the familiar, yet noticeably wispier, voice of Mr. Lawson replied. “Th...
Weekly Contest #359
If it hadn’t been for Em’s promise of covering her tab, Mel would have been anywhere else that night. Mel figured that a few mixed drinks would help her overcome any regrets she’d come to have for partying at ArtistCon’s kickoff celebration. The combination of anime fight scenes being projected onto the walls and the dj spinning songs sung by synthesized vocalists was making her second guess the choice she’d made. Additionally, not that any of the men in the room were particularly appealing to her, it wasn’t helping her situation that the gi...
Weekly Contest #358
Paisley finally called, said she’s with her lawyer and they want to chat. Can’t afford no representation of my own so I guess the jig is up. It’s been up for a while now if I’m being honest and I guess this is the day I “pay for my sins” or whatever a “good Catholic boy” like me is supposed to believe. I don’t really know what I believe these days. No time for theoreticals and so called divine judgements, anyway, when man’s laws are about to shaft me.I’ll admit, I deserve this. My penance. What I don’t deserve is to be stuck in all this traf...
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