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Weekly Contest #57
He Did Get Around By Bob White Not sure there is ever anything funny about going to a funeral, but seeing as how it’s old Burby’s funeral, might change all that. This thought keeps poking at my brain like a rubber-nosed woodpecker in the petrified forest as I”m driving into the old town in what old Burby would call “a damn half lectric Tye Oter” and say “they killed all doze people at Pearl Harbor and…here we are giving back all deez jobs and money” and then he’d shake his big ol balloon head and say “damn Chop Suey Heads.” The man was a p...
Weekly Contest #56
The Dead Window By Bob White The only time I really had the dream, I was crying and scared, mom and daddy screaming at me! “Find it, find it…Find It!” they hollered! “I can’t see it.” I cried, as they tried to show me a picture…but, I couldn’t, I couldn’t see it, and then I couldn’t see them. Being probably about ten years old, at that age where dirty feet, black ringlets around my neck, missed baths didn’t matter. What was important was farts, shortcuts through the neighborhood, rock paper scissors, and looking up to older boys w...
Weekly Contest #55
The Ultimate Nimrod By Bob White Well trying to clean up all the loose ends, retire with a clean slate, zero open cases, no calls to clear up, nothing I might have left behind, or missed, maybe just stuffed in a pile, because even though I am a very successful attorney, I could be a poster child for disorganization. I am the person who swears organized people are just too lazy to look for stuff. I tried to steer Mr. Oliphant to a new attorney, but with his being sort of an oddball, and his having been a longtime well-paying client made m...
Weekly Contest #54
Forty Nine By Bob White I never would have guessed that forty nine years ago driving away from this quaint town in an old Ford station wagon, with a four finger bag of seedy ass Mexican, about two hundred dollars cash and oh, cannot forget my four hundred eight tracks. Little did I know that I would not return for fifty years or so, and that my return would be in an electrically powered car? My birthplace, my little league park, my first skateboard park, my first heavy petting memory, my public education, so many things that helped it be ...
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