From the Highest of Highs to the Lowest of Lows

Graduation

“Mum, Dad, you made it! And Steven, you came as well.”

“Couldn’t miss my little sister’s graduation, particularly with your success.” Steven hugged Emma briefly before asking the question her parents had on their lips. “Who’s this, sis?”

“This is Flight Lieutenant Tony Smythe. The Tony, I spoke of, Mum.” Emma introduced the man dressed in RAAF uniform. “Steven, I met Tony during my first week here.”

“But you’ve never brought him home for Christmas or for other holidays?”

“Sorry, Steven, Mr & Mrs Glenister but I was never able to get enough leave at those times.” Tony smiled as he put an arm gently round Emma’s shoulder.

As she responded by lifting a hand to hold his arm, her mother gasped. “Emma! Is that what I think it is?”

Emma smiled. “It is. Tony proposed earlier. He says he wanted, hoped, to make the day even more special. I’m not sure if you thought about how, it might have been, if I had said “No”, Tony.”

Tony blanched. “God, I didn’t think about that. But you did say yes, didn’t you. I convinced myself that you would say yes, even if you could have any male in sight.”

George, Emma’s father, took the step needed, not waiting for his wife, Dinah, to recover her wits, moving to shake Tony’s hand.

“Flight Lieutenant, welcome to the family. You obviously make Emma very happy and that makes you fine by us.”

Dinah nodded slowly, still telling herself that Emma didn’t really need her approval and conscious that whenever her daughter had mentioned his name, her voice had changed in a way that had said, without saying it. “I’m in love, Mum.”

Steven, who was not as sure as his father, decided they needed to move. “We’ve only a few minutes before the award ceremony is due to start, Emma. I guess you don’t want to miss it.” He chuckled.

Emma gasped. “Come on, we do need to move.”

A few minutes later the University Chancellor entered the presentation hall accompanied by a woman dressed in a Professor’s gown and there was a buzz of mystery; who was she? Not one of the university lecturers for sure.

“Oh my God, that’s Maeve Stanway, Charlie.” Emma whispered to her friend, sat below her in the row ahead.

“You are joking! How did they get her?”

Emma shrugged, struggling with her nerves. She would have given her right arm to have her as her PhD mentor and she was going to receive her degree from her! “Oh wow!” She muttered.

Professor Stanway spoke briefly before the ceremony started. “I am honoured to have been invited by the University to present this year’s successful students with their degrees. Congratulations to you all. I would add one reminder. This is only the first day of the rest of your lives. Our future, Australia’s future, maybe even the world’s future depends on intelligent people both here and around the globe delivering their best in whatever their field of expertise proves. May I wish you all, good fortune.”

With that, the Chancellor began the roll call and each student stepped on to the stage from a queue of fellows to receive their scrolls and a few words from the Professor. Eventually, the final few reached the stage with Emma at the back. To her consternation as she went forward the Dean, who had been one of those marshalling the process, stopped her. “Wait, please.”

As she did so, the Chancellor turned from the stand, still holding the list of students which he had steadfastly referred to and spoke to the audience.

“We are almost at the end of the ceremony but it would be wrong were I not to acknowledge the role of our guest today. Most of you will know of her reputation as a world-renowned astronomer but many will not be aware that Professor Stanway has a second reputation which she rarely acknowledges.” He smiled at his guest. “For many years, she has acted as a mentor to students seeking to complete their own PhDs. Many of those students have gone on to great things, often leading research projects at observatories around the world. Her reputation amongst undergraduates has meant that she receives dozens of applications to join her group. Typically, she has had four or five studying under her tutelage. Sadly, the Professor has decided that she must concentrate on her own research for the immediate future.”

Emma listened in confusion as her heart leapt with dismay. If the Professor was no longer mentoring, she would have to find another tutor and none of them were as good.

“I am delighted to reveal, however, that, at the University’s request, she has agreed to accept a single applicant this year.”

He then looked down at the list of students. “I am sorry, we have one final student to receive her degree. Bachelor of Science, First Class with Honours in Astrophysics and Astronomy, Emma Glenister.”

Emma, her emotions still awry with the news of the Professor’s plans, almost tripped as she walked up the steps to be greeted by the Chancellor. “Sorry for making you wait, Emma.” And then by the Professor who was now beaming. “Congratulations, Miss Glenister, I have seen the report by your tutors.” She continued with a few quiet words. “Emma, you are remarkable. I look forward to working with you at ASKAP. If you still want to, of course.”

“You mean… I’m that single student? Oh Lord. Thank you, Professor, thank you.” Emma stuttered as she left the stage.

Later that evening, over a celebration meal, her mother asked. “You’ll be going to Perth for your PhD studies. What about you, Tony?”

Emma smiled, she knew her Mom was not entirely happy with their engagement news but the question was quite reasonable. “Tony’s managed to wangle a posting not that far from the observatory. It’s a new base. He’s hoping to make Squadron Leader and he’ll be flying missions supporting the coastguard. And, Mum. He really is the one for me.” She added with a smile and hug with him.

***

A Year Later - ASKAP. Wajarri Country.

Emma stirred from her tablet, looking out at the view over the hills. It was a clear night and the Milky Way had risen but it wasn’t that that held her gaze. What she was looking at wasn’t there, not to the naked eye. She knew it was there, she had seen it through the telescope, now she had to understand what it was and, maybe, where had it come from.

“Emma! Have you completed that scan? And if not, why not?” Maeve Stanway appeared at the door to the telescope control room.

Emma grimaced before smiling. “It’s running, Maeve, should be done within the hour. I’ve increased the length. Just to ensure that we don’t miss something. And I’ve programmed a secondary sweep to run five minutes behind the first.”

Maeve looked at her student with approval. “That’s fantastic. Well thought out, Emma. Get some sleep, I know you’re looking to see Tony tomorrow, while he has enough leave to get up here.”

“Thanks, Boss. See you tomorrow night.”

***

Why?

The next morning Emma was up much earlier than usual. Tony would be on his way. Finally, she settled down with a coffee, to wait.

Hours passed and she started to worry, Tony was always on time or, if he was going to be late, he would ring or message. Then, the sound of a car, broke the silence previously only disturbed by the songbirds. Can’t be Tony, she thought, going to the door and seeing a dark, grey, vehicle pulling up. Her heart stopped and as she stood staring, a man got out of the car together with a younger female.

“Emma Glenister?” The woman, wearing the uniform of a RAAF Captain, asked gently and when Emma nodded in dumb terror. “Jane Hawsley. This is Jimmy Hall. Please can we come in.”

Emma led them into her small living room. “Sorry, I’ve only two chairs.” She mumbled.

“Not a problem, I can stand.” The man said, again as gently as his colleague. Emma suddenly recognised his insignia as that of a Wing Commander. He was Tony’s commanding officer!

“Oh God, no. Please, no. Tell me he’s okay, please.” She cried, knowing they wouldn’t be there, if he was.

“Emma. I’m sorry, so sorry. There is no easy way to tell you. Tony is dead. His fighter crashed on approach to the base; he didn’t eject.”

“How? He was a brilliant pilot. He was… he was... oh God; how?”

“How?” The Commander spoke quietly but with emotion. “Your fiancé died, Emma, because he was brave and self-sacrificing. There was a bird strike, a few miles out, which killed his engine. He could have ejected but the plane was still over the town, it would have almost certainly hit a local school, just as the kids were coming out. He stayed in the cockpit, fighting the plane clear before it crashed in the fields. The fireball, had he ejected, would undoubtedly have killed many including children. He saved, maybe, hundreds of lives but at the cost of his own.”

“Why did you come here?”

“Because you are named as his next of kin.” Jane replied. She looked at Emma. “Tony was so proud that you had said yes when he proposed. We have watched him on cloud nine since that day last year.”

Through her tears Emma began to realise that there would be things she had to do.

“I will have to arrange his funeral, won’t I? Collect his things, sort out his bills…” She stopped recognising that she was starting to ramble. “I’m not ready for this, I’m sorry but where do I even start?”

“You need not worry about the funeral. We in the RAAF look after our own. You can argue against it but we wish to provide a full military funeral with a burial at the armed forces cemetery.” Jimmy continued. “We will miss him both as a serviceman but more importantly as a friend and colleague. Jane was in his flight group; he was her wingman on joint sorties.”

Emma looked up at Jane. “I’m sorry, you must be feeling bad but you’re expected to be strong for me.” Then without thinking about it, she leaned forward and hugged her; it was too much for the other who dissolved into tears. Jimmy retreated to the car, where a few moments later, he was challenged by two women, one apparently in her twenties and a second person whom he recognised as Maeve Stanway.

“Professor, pleased to meet you, though I wish it was not in such circumstances.” In response to her glare. “Wing Commander Hall.”

Before he could say anything more, Maeve replied. “Wing Commander! Then it is true the pilot killed was Emma’s fiancé?” Her words were part statement, part question.

“You’ve heard the news, then.” Jimmy growled. “We only got here a short time ago; I had hoped to tell Miss Glenister ahead of anyone else. She was Tony’s next of kin; it was important that we told her first and in person.”

Maeve nodded. “The television news says that he was a hero. He saved people. How has Emma taken it?” She stopped. “Stupid, stupid question. Commander, is she alone? We should go to her.”

“She isn’t alone, one of my colleagues is with her, although they were both in tears a few moments ago. I felt I should let them have some time before we must return to our duties.”

Maeve nodded again. “Then we will relieve your colleague, Commander. It seems a little trite but I am truly sorry for your loss.”

***

In the following days, Jane spent as much time as she could with Emma, often comforting her when she fell into spells of tears and anger.

“Jane, I’m sorry but why has it taking so long, after all it’ll only be a small service. I mean I know that you and your colleagues will be there but otherwise there’s just my parents and brother.”

“Emma, it has taken longer and I’m sorry but there were other things we had to handle.” Jane looked at her, now, friend. “I don’t think it’s going to be that small either. Tony’s sacrifice touched countless people. The funeral cortege will have to pass through the town.”

Emma froze. “You mean….”

“Yes. Emma, you should remember that Tony could have ejected. If he had the plane would, almost certainly, have hit the school or at least crashed right next to it. If it had, dozens of children might have died or, at best, suffered terrible injuries. Parents and teachers would also have been among the casualties; they saw Tony fighting to fly the plane clear. They aren’t ever going to forget it.”

“Jane, will you be there?”

Jane smiled, sadly. “I’m sorry but I must be on duty. I will see you at the wake, I promise.”

***

The Funeral.

The day of the funeral arrived with bright sunshine and, apart from a few scattered clouds, clear skies. As Emma prepared to leave her apartment with her family, a limousine pulled up in the square carrying RAAF insignia.

“He’s going to get one hell of a send-off, love.” George commented as he hugged his daughter. “Time to be strong. To the outside world anyway.”

Emma nodded, while gritting her teeth.

It took almost an hour to reach the town, even though every junction was kept clear by police motor bikes. As they reached the outskirts, they turned aside to enter a small square where a guard of honour waited alongside the hearse that would lead them to the cemetery.

As the RAAF personnel boarded a coach, Emma left the limo, walking to the hearse. “Please. I need a few minutes alone with him before…”

The driver and his colleagues nodded and withdrew. Emma reached inside and touched the coffin, draped in the flags of Australia and of the air force. There were four wreaths, hers, her family’s, one from the RAAF and one from the townsfolk.

“Tony…Tony you were everything to me. I love you. I don’t understand why God had to take you before we could live but I do understand why you acted as you did, even if it meant I lost you. Rest easy, my darling.”

With that she nodded to the driver and, squaring her shoulders, returned to her parents. A few moments later the cortege moved off and slowly drove through the town along streets lined with silent crowds. Emma’s heart broke again and her tears fell unheeded as she saw the people who stood to honour her Tony.

The service in the military chapel was, thankfully, short before the walk to the graveside accompanied by an honour guard, this time of Royal Marines. As they stood next to the coffin, Jimmy, in full dress uniform, stepped forward with his own few words.

“In these times of peace for our country, it is easy to forget that we must always be ready to fight to retain our security. Flight Lieutenant Tony Smythe embodied the bravery and honour that our people need from our servicemen. He gave his life that others might live and he will be remembered.”

As he finished there was the roar of low flying aircraft and a flight of F-35s flew across the cemetery. As they did so a single plane broke from the centre of the group climbing away to leave a break. The Missing Man Formation, their last honour to a fellow pilot.

Emma, struggling with her emotions again, turned to Jimmy. “Wing Commander, Jane told me she was on duty. That was her, wasn’t it?”

He nodded. “Yes. Here she comes again. Watch the wings.”

The lone fighter swept past waggling its wing tips before climbing away.

Back at the airbase, the atmosphere was subdued, especially when Emma arrived. “Too downbeat.” she thought, as she greeted Jane.

“Jane, can you get their attention?”

Jane laughed and picking up a bottle from the bar used it rather like a gavel. “Listen up, you horrible lot! Our guest of honour wants a word.”

The buzz of subdued conversation died, as Emma spoke. “Everyone, you’d think we were at a funeral! Tony, my fiancé, lived his life to the full. He enjoyed living. Please let us celebrate that. Celebrate him, don’t weep for him he wouldn’t have wanted that; and I’ve done enough of that for you all. Now. Let me lead the way. Everyone got a glass, a full glass, I mean? Silly question, I know, but raise them please to Tony, one of your own, like you, a hero. Tony!”

Her words, rather more than she had intended to say, did have the trick and the gathering relaxed and began to enjoy remembering the good times.

***

Afterwards.

Four months had passed since the funeral but, while Emma’s work continued at a pace, she found herself suffering periods, short though they might be, of depression.

“They say that finally burying a loved one allows closure.” Emma said to Maeve, not for the first time dissolving into tears “I miss him. I know we weren’t even living together but now I wake up every morning with the same thought – why isn’t he here with me?”