Tilden Home Owners Association

Murder most foul. What if murder is nothing more than a ritualist human sacrifice? Of all the sins, in my estimation, murder is the most heinous act there is, especially when it is premediated and planned.

When Sally and I moved into the Tilden neighborhood, it was a step up from the condo we lived in the west side of the city. After our wedding, we moved into our dream condo, but over time the crime rate seemed to climb exponentially, and the neighborhood became a haven for crime. When Sally became pregnant, I decided it was time we moved to a safer neighborhood after one of my neighbors was murdered.

“Yeah Jim, I heard Tilden was a gated community.” Scott told me as we ate lunch in the employee breakroom. Scott was a supervisor in the IT department of Kingston Inc. He seemed like a straight shooter who lived in a remote part of town up in the hills where most of his neighbors were doctors and lawyers. “They have a HOA, but from what I heard they are a fun-loving bunch nerds.”

He laughed and shook his head.

“I’m not sure.” I sighed.

“Look most HOAs are a pain in the ass, but I’ve heard nothing but good things about this one.” He tilted his head as he gave me a sidelong glance. “You should get in contact with them. See whatcha think.”

I did. I met with Roger Harrison who was the president of the HOA. He told a few corny jokes we both had a chuckle over before he offered to show us the house we would eventually buy.

“This is a sweetheart deal.” He showed us a two-story faux Victorian three-bedroom home. I could tell Sally fell instantly in love with the place since there was plenty of room to put in a garden in the backyard. There was a two-car garage with enough room to put in a workbench. After viewing the house, Roger had us sit at a table in the kitchen to look over all financial details.

Driving back to our condo, Sally touched my arm, “Jim, that place is a dream house.”

“Yeah, it seems like a great deal.” I agreed.

“Roger Harrison seems like such a great guy.” She added.

I chuckled thinking about the jokes he told during out introduction.

So, that’s how we moved into this house. The police officer nodded as he wrote this in his pocket pad. He put the pencil to his lip and said, “So, Mr. Young, continue.”

“I don’t know which one of us began to notice odd things about some of our neighbors.” I glanced over at Sally as she bounced the baby on her knee.

“Could you give me some examples of odd.” The officer requested.

“Hey, are you our new neighbors?” The man peered over our privacy fence still holding his garden hose.

“Yes, I’m Jim Young and this is my wife Sally and our baby, Sarah.” I introduced us to our neighbor.

“I’m Hal Gregaret.” He put out his hand to me, and I shook it. “I am the president of the Tilden Home Owners Association.”

“I see.” I nodded.

“The Tilden HOA is a very prestigious organization.” He said with a great deal of pride.

“We are both glad to be a part of your HOA.” Sally smiled as Sarah wiggled to get free.

A few weeks later Roger showed up with his wife Trudy. He brought over some champagne with cheese and crackers.

“We thought we’d have a get-to-know-the-Youngs.” Roger said as Trudy laughed on cue. Before you know it we were having a great time with lots of stories that made us all laugh. Roger told us about a professor he had in college who was rather odd in a funny way. He also told us about a HOA get-together event that he wanted us to go to.I instantly agreed we would.

“What did you think of Trudy?” Sally asked as she removed her makeup sitting at her vanity. Sarah had gone to sleep without much of a fuss.

“I dunno. She seemed alright.” I shrugged one shoulder as I removed my socks.

“She seemed stiff to me.” She glanced over at me.

“How so?”

“She would laugh at our conversation, but she never had anything to add.”

“Maybe she’s shy?” I suggested.

“I don’t think so.” Sally shook her head, “She kept staring at me. It made me feel uneasy.”

“Sorry sweetheart, I did not notice.”

“It could be I’m still self-conscious.” She shrugged.

“Perhaps.” I didn’t think much about it after that.

But when we had the get-together as Roger’s house a few weeks later, Sarah was having a difficult say so Sally decided to stay home. I went bringing an ambrosia Sally made and put it with the dishes on the dining room table the other guests had brought. I must confess, the other dishes were exquisite.

“Glad you could make it, Jim.” Roger patted me on the back as I placed the ambrosia among the other plates.

“Glad to be here. Sarah is having some difficulties keeping her formula down, but Sally insisted I come anyway.” I smiled.

“You do not want to miss one of these get-togethers.” He wined as he nodded, but his smile seemed insidious for some reason.

I ended up talking with Dawn and Darron Oberman as they joked about their alliterative first names. The conversation seemed almost manic as if they stopped talking something bad would happen to them. When I couldn’t take anymore of their chatter, I moved to the couch that was vacant. As a man passed by with a tray of goblets filled with red wine, I snatched a glass and began sipping it. It was so dry, my mouth began to crave water. Leaving my wine, I wandered into the kitchen where Trudy stood at the island cutting raw meat.

“Do you need a hand?” I asked.

“Oh no.” She shook her head and wiped her hands on her apron. “This is what I do during one of our get-togethers.”

I could not help but noticed how bloody her apron was.Whatever she was cutting was leaving quite a trail of blood behind. She put the raw meat on a metal sheet and into the middle shelf of the oven.

“There, got that done.” She said triumphantly. “What do you need, Mr. Young?”

“Call me Jim.” I nodded, “Some water, please.”

“Roger would not like me calling our guests by their first name.” She chuckled.

Why the hell not? I wondered. Even my subordinates at the company called me Jim. Sally was right, Trudy Harrison was odd. She poured water from a place on the refrigerator and handed it to me.

“Thank you.” I nodded as I took the glass from her hand.

“Dinner will be ready shortly.” She smiled as I took a sip.

“Good.” I smiled, “I’m getting a bit hungry. What are you serving?”

“Our usual.” She beamed.

Usual? I must admit, however, it did smell good. Feeling hydrated, I walked back into the dining room.

“There you are.” Roger said as soon as I emerged from the kitchen.

“Just needed some water.” I held up the half empty glass.

“We were just about to get started.” He smiled.

“Started with what?”

“As we wait for our dinner to cook, we play a game of Bingo. I do the honors calling the game.” He slapped me on the shoulder.

I got a Bingo card and sat in one of the folding chairs at a long table.

“This is going to be so exciting.” The woman sitting next to me shook with anticipation.

I had played Bingo plenty of times, but I did not see it as a very exciting game. I did know people who take the game quite seriously. I am not one of those people. If I am playing, I am playing it just to be part of the crowd. That’s what I was doing as Roger began to call numbers. Everyone marked their cards as quickly as Roger called the numbers.

“You’d better keep up.” The lady next to me told me from the side of her mouth.

“Bingo!” I heard.

Roger called the next number and someone in the back of the room yelled, “Bingo.”

“What’s this?” I asked.

“Shush.” The woman next to me put her finger to his lips.

“When someone yells, ‘Bingo.’ That’s the end of the game.” I put my open hand to my head and leaned on it.

“This is strange.” The officer whistled and shook his head. “Everyone there was playing Bingo?”

“Hang on, it get weirder.” I grinned.

“Keep up.” The lady whispered, “Otherwise…”

“Otherwise, what?”

“You may be the one.” She spoke out of the side of her mouth again.

“One what?” I was getting nervous about this whole game.

Next number called, the woman next to me yelled, “Bingo!”

“And now what?” I asked her.

“I will not be the one.” She smiled. “Do you need help? It looks like you have not been keeping up.”

“I’m fine.” I pulled my card away from her and her marker.

“Bingo!”

“Dinner will be ready when you are done, honey.” Trudy entered from the kitchen.

“Is everybody hungry?” Roger scanned the room.

“Yeah!” Everyone joined it.

“These get-togethers are what make the Tilden HOA a real happening event.” He sat down in the chair he had called the game from, “We will be eating shortly. I have six more people who are still in the game. May I remind you how important it is to mark your cards correctly in order to make this a fair game.”

“So, what happened next?” The police officer asked.

“It got very weird in a hurry.” I answered.

“According to your report, dinner was a bit appalling?”

“Indeed, officer.” I buried my head in my hands.

“Are you sure about this? It has been reported to me that the Tilden HOA is a very well-run organization.”

“I can understand that. Everyone is afraid to talk about what goes on there.”

“Well Mr. Young, what goes on there?”

I called, “Bingo!”

“We have five left in the game.” Roger smiled. “We will see who will be the one.”

And so the game continued as four more people yelled Bingo.

“Noooo.” The last player left in the game moaned. He was an elderly man named Jack Noonan. Jack was the only player who did not yell Bingo.

“Well Mr. Noonan, it looks as if you are the one.” Roger chuckled. Everybody else joined in laughing as Mr. Noonan pleaded with Roger. So pathetic was his pleading, I began to feel a mix of my own emotions. I felt sorry for Jack, but everyone else was laughing. I had no idea what was happening. Jack stood up.

“I’m going home.” He pouted as he crossed his arms across his chest.

“Don’t be a poor sport, Mr. Noonan.” Roger laughed, “The game was fair and square.”

“It doesn’t feel like it.” He shook his head.

“Of course not, when you are the one.” Roger said raising his eyebrows, “But it’s been that way since I took over. The game offers a sense of suspense, don’t you think?”

“I am leaving.” He walked toward the door.

“We will see you for our annual celebration.” Roger added just as Jack opened the front door.

“Unless I move to somewhere else.” He was close to tears.

“We will find you.” Roger laughed. As everyone joined in the laughter, Jack walked out the front door, slamming it as he did. “There you have it. A poor sport. Everyone who plays takes a chance that he or she will be the one.”

I could not get this whole scene out of my mind.

“Aren’t you glad you’re not the one?” The woman next to me grinned. Her grin seemed fake to me.

“So, what was Mr. Noonan so upset about?”

“He was the one.” She answered as if I was imposing. She gave me a shrug with one shoulder as she made her way to where Roger was still sitting.

“You’d better turn in your card.” The man sitting on the other side of me said. “If you don’t you could be disqualified.”

His smile seem just as fake as the woman sitting on my right.

“Time to eat, everyone.” Roger pointed to the table that Trudy had set up as a buffet.

“Oh my, this looks exquisite.” One of the guests commented as she passed the plates line up on the long table covered with a plain white cloth.

When my eyes fell on the meat platter, I could tell there was something very strange about the way it looked, but I could not quite put my finger on it.

“Help yourself. You’ve got people waiting behind you.” The woman who sat next to me during the game told me.

“I’m a vegetarian.” I shook my head.

“Fine, but please keep this line moving.” She was losing patience with me.

I nodded and picked up some salad with the server to put on my empty plate. The dressing, however, was thick and red. As I looked at the other offerings, nothing seemed very appetizing and the woman behind me was becoming agitated with me as I passed many of the dishes without digging in. When I came to the end of the table, I only had the salad without the dressing. I sat down and began to eat the plain salad, but it too had a strange aftertaste.

“You reported about a ritualistic ceremony in July?” The officer asked. “Can you tell me about it?”

“Yes. This is why Jack Noonan was so distressed.” I closed my eyes since the memory was still lodged tightly in my mind.

It was a warm summer evening. The sun had set and there were tiki lamps set all over this large flat stone. Trudy was calmly setting up Tupperware containers all around the stone.Everyone was dressed in a white robe except me. I was still the newest member of the Tilden HOA and therefore still not required to don the ceremonial robe like everyone else.

When Roger appeared, he was wearing a large headdress with plumes of feathers extending from the headdress.

“I wish to welcome everyone from the Tilden Home Owners Association to our annual summer ceremony.” He paused, as everyone became silent, “Tonight we will preform our ceremony as Jack Noonan has been fairly chosen to be the one.”

When he pulled out a curved knife from its sheath, I did a doubletake. Then I watched as four members lead Jack Noonan out in chains.He was not screaming of hollering like I would been doing, but when I looked closer at him, I saw that he had been drugged. The four members laid him down on the flat boulder face up and wrapped his shackles around four posts.

Roger mumbled a few words in a language I did not recognize before running the blade of his knife across Jack’s throat sending up a fountain of blood which Trudy collected in her Tupperware containers.

“We are members of the Tilden HOA.” The crowd began to chant as Roger held the unsheathed knife above his head and repeating words from a language I had never heard before. Jack lay dead on the stone. Roger did not call what he had done a murder, rather a sacrifice to a god I had never heard of. He was praying to that god to keep the Tilden HOA protected from those outside the community who would shut down the HOA if they knew what took place.

“Well Mr. Young, I think I have enough to put this guy away.” He slapped his notebook closed and put it in his pocket. “I wish you a good evening and best of luck in your new community.”

“Thank you, officer.” I waved as he walked through our front door past all of the packing boxes.

As soon as the officer left, I heard a scream followed by a knock at the front door. When I opened it, Roger was standing there with his knife dripping of blood. I knew right away whose blood it was.

“I know you are not planning to desert the Tilden HOA.” He leaned on the door frame. “If I suspected you went to the police, you would become the next one. The ceremony we preform here is based on an ancient druid rite. It is as old as the dawn of time.” His laughter exploded in my mind. He was the high priest of a Druid cult that still preformed human sacrifices like the one I witnessed with Jack Noonan.

Roger tilted his head and stared at me with his sparkling blue eyes, and I knew he had selected his next victim. His lips betrayed a hint of a smile before he turned and walked away.

As the silence overcame me, all I could hear was the sound of the beating of my own heart.