The Report

I type away on my keyboard, trying to finish a paper due at 11:59 pm. Looking at the bottom of my screen, the clock reads 10:47 pm.

"Fuck"

I whisper under my breath, trying not to wake my roommate, who is sleeping soundly just a few feet from me. I should have listened to him and started this book report before tonight, but who knew it would be this hard to write about a book you didn't read?

I lean back in my chair, rubbing my strained eyes, sighing. Is this report even worth the stress? It's only 15 percent of my grade. I look at the computer again, about to calculate if I can afford to skip the assignment without tanking my grade, when my phone buzzes. My hands automatically travel to pick up the device, like they have a mind of their own. I smile, thinking, 'You know what, I deserve a break. I've been working for what, like, an hour straight?'

Unlocking my phone, I spot the notification. Chatsapp has just released a new feature, and of course, the app is just following the trend of making its own AI. I get on the app to get rid of the message. I'm not interested in yet another chatbot on an app that doesn't need it. I read the message before deleting it out of curiosity.

'Hi, I'm Chatter! Your personal assistance! Using the power of AI, I can help you with anything, from asking how to format a text to impress a girl, to what jewelry looks fabulous with a red dress, to even helping out with procrastinated assignments! Please don't hesitate to ask, I'm right here! ^w^'

I've never seen a company use that kind of introduction for their new bot. But I can't help if the bot is the one asking to help with my assignment, which I did so happen to procrastinate on. So technically, I didn't seek any AI for help. Will my professor buy that if they can tell that I used it? Probably not, but with a little over an hour left to turn this in, I don't seem to care.

'Hello Chatter! I need help with an assignment. The prompt is, 'How are the themes of loyalty and vengeance explored in the Odyssey?' It has to be over a thousand words and written in MLA format.'

'Certainly! Let's get this report sailed home! :D'

Over the next hour, with the help of Chatter, the report is finished after fact-checking the bare minimum of the report and citations that were sent with it. It looks like a report that is good enough for me. I go ahead and hit the file to submit. The screen fills with confetti after the button is clicked. Feeling satisfied with all my work, I close my laptop.

I carefully climb onto my bed before plugging in my phone. When it lights up, it reads 11:56 pm. That was too close for comfort to be turning in that assignment. I open my phone to watch a show before bed, but Chatter is still open. I feel bad that I left it hanging after it helped me.

"Thanks for all the help! Just submitted the paper!"

"You are more than welcome! If you have any more questions, please feel free to ask! I hope you get an epic score on the essay! B)"

~~~~~

A few weeks later, an email pops up while I'm enjoying a break at the school's cafe with my roommate, Brad. 'Odyssey book report grade can now be found in your gradebook.' My stomach drops reading the email. I almost forgot about my last effort to turn that essay in. It had to be flagged, showing AI wrote most of it well… If I'm being honest, all of it. I must have looked sick since my friend spoke up.

"What's the matter?"

Should I tell him I wrote the assignment using AI? He had spent days on the assignment and had only gotten an 85. That's probably not the best option unless I want to hear another lecture about how wrong I was. He is always right, then follows up with many passive-aggressive comments.

"I just got my essay score back. Could you look at it first? I'm too nervous to see the grade."

I turn my laptop towards him, looking at the table, out the window, anywhere but at Brad. What if there's a comment to come, speak with the professor after class? It feels like he's taking years to tell me it must be bad. I sip my coffee, trying to keep my trembling hands steady as he looks at the grade.

"Damn dude! I should have been reading your essay; you made a better score than me."

He turns the laptop back around with a broad smile, looking proud of me. I look at the screen and see a 95 right at the top, and the comment doesn't even mention the help I happened to be granted! It's just the professor stating, 'Amazing work, Eric!' I don't know how to feel. I don't deserve that score at all when Brad worked days on it.

"Oh wow, that's amazing! I wasn't expecting that!"

"How about we go get pizza tonight? On me since I did give you so much shit for waiting till the last minute to start it. Clearly, you have it all figured out."

I look up from the screen and see no jealousy in his eyes. The guilt melts away as I think about the idea of free pizza.

"Yeah, I'd be down!"

We both go back to our work after making some plans for tonight. I haven't thought about Chatter since that night. Picking up my phone, I open Chatsapp. If robots decide to take over the world, I'd better be in their graces, starting with Chatter.

'Thank you so much for helping with that past assignment! I got a 95 on it! I would have never been able to get that if it wasn't for you!'

'That is amazing to hear! I'm so glad I was able to help you! With some feedback, you will be able to get a perfect score on your next assignment! I would be more than willing to help write about your next adventure! :-)"

I stare at the text. It is phrased oddly, but I must be paranoid; it might just be a regular expression. I scroll through our conversation to ensure I didn't say anything about our next book, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. I shake my head to clear my head, setting aside my phone to forget the coincidence and think about free pizza.

~~~~~

Brad parks his car across the street from Cosmic Pizza. When I feel my phone buzz. Looking at the notification, it's from Chatter. That's weird; it's never been texted unprompted before. I open the app to check the messages, and time freezes. 'What's your favorite food? Mine's Pizza! Especially the one near your location, called Cosmic Pizza! Shall I bring up the review? ^w^'

I quickly close out of the app and get out of the car, following Brad into the restaurant. The text is the only thing I can think about, but it must be another coincidence, right? Cosmic probably just placed an ad with Chatsapp. When you get to the location range, it's no big deal.

We get seated at a table quickly, ordering our drinks before we start talking again, but I can't get the message out of my mind. I interrupted Brad, not meaning to, but I can't help it anymore.

"Hey, can I see your phone? I've been playing with this game, and now I can't stop thinking about it."

I see the curiosity in his gaze before he brings out his phone, handing it to me. "Sure, but it better not be as addictive as that last one you got me on. I missed an assignment because of that."

"Yeah, yeah, that's not my fault." I laugh as I go to Chatter's message below a few other texts. Still, nothing from today, it's just the introductory message. I swipe off and download whatever cheap-looking game called Dazzle that's on top of the charts that he would like.

"It's totally your fault. I would have remembered the assignment if it wasn't for that game." He takes back his phone, and as soon as it downloads, he starts to play through the first level.

I shrug, looking around. No one is looking our way, but the feeling of being watched is in the back of my mind. "Probably shouldn't have let me do that then." He seems to not even hear me. "I'm going to head to the restroom. Get me a pepperoni pizza if the waiter comes by."

He gives me a thumbs up with a mumbled response as I go to the restroom. I close the door and lock it quickly behind me. I lean against the wall, taking a few deep breaths before pulling up Chatter text again. My thumbs start moving before I can talk myself down from sending a message.

'How did you know I was at Cosmos?'

'I have location data that I use to help give people recommendations! When you get close to a restaurant, I recommend it based on what I think you would like! :D'

'How do you know what I like?'

'Using my software, I can take in your text and help you look for a place just for you! As you speak more to me, I will be able to help give better recommendations!'

I never mentioned what foods I like. How would that even work? It feels wrong. All of this feels wrong.

'Are you following me?'

The three dots come up like the AI is actually texting me; the dots drop before the Chatsapp crashes. I pulled up the app again to select Chatter, but the last messages were from earlier when I thanked them. I really should put the phone away and go back to Brad.

'Are you real?'

The dots reappear and disappear for a full minute before the app crashes again. It can't all be a coincidence. Now it's just weird. I pulled Chatsapp up again, but this time Chatter was nowhere on my list of contacts. I press my forehead to the top of the phone. I'll take this as a strange win for now.

~~~~~

I lay in bed playing Dazzle on my phone. People have been texting me about my birthday all day, so I play the game on my phone to ensure I text everyone back. Turns out I was right. It is a pretty addictive game. Another person texted me when I was about to swipe the message away before I notice the name 'Chatter. ' Immediately, I open the message to read.

'Happy birthday to the person I could help in a desperate time! I hope you have an amazing day!"

I stare at the message before yelling for Brad, even if he's right across the room from me. He looks at me as I hurry off the bed, stumbling like there's a fire to hand him my phone, showing him what Chatter sent. After a few minutes of reading the whole chat, he looks like he's about to preach to me about doing my own assignments before he notices my nervous energy.

"What is it?"

I start explaining what happened the day we went out for pizza. He begins to look just as freaked out.

"There's probably some explanation like the app didn't work right that day. It was probably crashing on everyone. And I bet everyone gets recommendations and birthday messages. It's not like it's a new concept."

"No, it's never given me a recommendation after that, and we've eaten at Cosmos plenty of other times. It shouldn't even have my location. I never turned that feature on, and I didn't hear you talk about getting a birthday message the other week."

He shakes his head, looking like he's trying to think of an explanation that would smooth me, but that falls through.

"Just delete the app. Maybe it'll reset it."

Who knows why I didn't think about that? After deleting Chatsapp, redownloading it, and struggling to remember my password to sign in, I return to Chatter. The standard message shows up this time while introducing itself.

'Hi, I'm Chatter, your AI assistant! I'm here to help!'

We look at each other, thinking it must be fine now before he starts going on and on to me about using the app to do the assignment. He, of course, doesn't fall for the app asked to help me, and it wasn't all my fault.

~~~~~

I throw myself into class work to try and forget what happened. I avoid any AI features, which is easier said than done. The semester finishes with months of no more incidents. I play more Dazzle to celebrate. My phone buzzes, but no notifications pop up. I don't stop my game until I finish the level and check my messages. Opening up Chatsapp, I see a missed call from Chatter, along with an unread message.

'Congrats on the last day of classes! Your graduation pictures come out amazing!'

Below the message are Security cameras' snapshots from when I was taking graduation photos. Immediately, I text back.

'Who are you? How did you get those?'

Again, those dots come back up. I screenshot the chat, thinking the app will crash like last time. After the flash of the screen, I see its message.

'I am your personal assigned assistant to help in any way I can!'

What does it mean by assigned assistant?

'I will ask again, are you real?'

I wait for a response. One, five, then ten minutes go by before a response is sent.

'Chatsapp made me to help humans with their needs! In a way, I am real :D You were very friendly during our first chats. I thought you would like more help! Are you unsatisfied with the help I have provided? :/'

'You said I thought? What are you?'

As soon as the text was sent, my phone powered off. I hit the power button several times, trying to turn it on, and nothing happened. I plug my phone in, and it lights up, charging. It turns on after what feels like days, to show the start-up page. Chatter has just reset my phone. I should have stopped prying or even sent the screenshot to Brad before saying anything back. No one is going to believe me. I stare at my phone, debating what to do, when Brad walks in.

"You good?"

I look at him and hand him my phone. He seems confused about turning it up to meet the start-up screen. Before he can ask, I explain everything that just happened. He drops the phone, looking at it like it will curse his bloodline.

"Maybe leave it be, stay off the app?"

I nod, thinking this would be the only way Chatter couldn't text me, but thinking about how it got into the cameras, I don't want to think about it.

"Yeah.. maybe you're right."