The End is Where?

The End. Sorry you thought this was supposed to be just another story that would be told around campfires and sung in songs at day camp.

It came quickly and was known to give you chills up and down your spine. The hair on the back of your neck stood up and applauded. It was those knots in your stomach moments that had you running smack into what was causing these feeling of uneasiness.

Your eyes widened. You screamed silently. You were afraid like never before and no one could hear, like being in a silent movie with bad directing and no producer worth the time or make the efforts to do so.

It was the worst feeling that you could get like when you ate something that smelled ok and then you ran to meet Mr. Toilet, who was all too happy to make your acquaintance. You were trying to be cool and looked like it would be another year of being a clown in tryouts for Barnum and Bailey Ringling Bros circus.

You fell. You got back up to run again and then you look down to see your shoes are stuck in hot asphalt while you are running faster only to feel yourself sinking in quicksand. It was the moment you said, "Uh OH!!" "This is not the way the movie is supposed to end." "This has to be a dream."

Then you hear screams and the loud explosions. People are running and knocking things down as they are hit by driverless cars and are bounced off AI trampolines. Boing!!! The trampoline speaks, "Sucker." Playing, "Another One Bites the Dust."

It looks as if the calculated guesses were nowhere near the actual mark, even with the tattooed X marking the spot with sirens and a loud airhorn, blaring. The planes fly themselves. The robot armies run amuck and are laid to waste in the heated sun too close to earth's atmosphere. It is every one person out for themselves to find the last wearable tank of hydrogen. To breathe and to survive.

The monkeys and tigers at the local zoo have been warring with each other, while the undead are amazed at the urban legends that made them out to be the bad people, all they wanted was some edible long lasting human food. Forget Planet of the Apes. You haven't seen anything yet until you experience real life and the Apocalypse in the War started by drones and flying cars that are being navigated by the Independence Day Mother ship.

Its self-supported and had its mind rewired with a criminal brain from a psycho who is filled with anger and revenge. It can make a million Frankenstein, a million vampires and a million mummies that are not human or natural. It will read your mind and hate what you are thinking while it decides where to place you, the corner with the dunce hat is no longer an option.

You look up at the bright lights and think it will take you away from this. You are not sure how long to look up, when you are toasted like a marshmallow and played with like a soccer ball that will not go in the goal but bounces off wildly and hit the kicker in the stomach.

The reports are exaggerated and falsified in many ways. Even the conspiracy theories are fibbed. No one was where they claimed to be. They were too busy robbing Peter to pay Paul to pay Mary all the while the church was hiding its ill-gotten gains with food stamps. They claim that the invisible money was sent but no one will admit that it went missing with the stock market crash of both 1929 and 1980. It was never recovered, and it will remain on the AWOL list for many centuries to come and go.

Then the many people who were bought with plastic baseball cards to be trade for trolls and gnomes, who were set in cement were never able to hold their positions for any length of time as they found a new religion, that most will swear by, but this is prohibited. Hand gestures serve the same purpose but only to be used on bi-weekly Mondays, Wednesdays, and alternating Fridays unless a new holiday sports a baseball bat and catcher's mitt.

If your name is filled more vowels than proper verbs, you may be yet to be named, and you better be a card-carrying animal too. No exceptions to this rule, one of the only rules needed to be followed daily except on Saturday and odd Sundays on the Martian and Saturn running rings calendar.

You spin on your head in one direction, your body spins opposite and they separate at the waste, two midgets are found drunk in the emergency misty foam tank. They wake up with foam on the mouth, and they are sprayed for rabies. They went missing at the fingerprint counter at Walmart, while they are photographed at the local Olan Mills Picture studio, while watching movies at the local drive-in theater. No umbrellas provided when it rains. You have to come to the snacks and more diner, to purchase an umbrella for the low price of $69,999.

You will be carded at the beginning of, during the time of and at the end of the movie before you will be allowed to leave the premises. All trays will be placed in the upright position, and you will refrain from removing your shoes and socks at the discretion of the movie projector provider. Bob retired so no freer anything. $29 dollars is the going rate for extras that cost a buck ninety-nine at the local 2 dollars and more stores that are in the worst places possible.

If you claim to know everything, I want proof that you can know everything and still not know how to wash dishes or laundry on your days off. If you are smarter than the average bear, then the intellectual genius who is twitting his thumbs is all thumbs plainly seen. The picnic basket will still be trapped, and no goodies will be passed out after Halloween. Only after Thanksgiving unless you bring an unwrapped gift for the tree of life to use.