Love At First Sight

Some people don't believe in love at first sight, but Naomi and I are proof that it exists. From the very moment our eyes first locked, we both knew nothing would be the same.

We met when I was young. I'd been through a lot in the short time before she came into my life, but I'm grateful for every second of hardship because it all led me to her. And she is my everything.

I'll never forget that first day we met, our walk through the park together. It was a beautiful spring day and the scent of fresh flowers was thick in the air. There were souls all around us flocking to the warm rays of sunshine after a long winter without. We sat on a blanket overlooking the water and despite the crowds it felt like we were the only ones there. We shared a vanilla ice cream cone with sugary sprinkles and a kiss that was somehow sweeter. My soul sang in harmony with her laughter and I knew then, without a doubt, that Naomi was the one. The one I wanted to kiss every day for the rest of my days. The one who would love me truly and never hurt me, never leave. All of my fears, all of my heartbreak, all washed away by the promise of her.

From that day forward we made a promise to each other that we would stay together no matter what. I am hers and she is mine. If she goes, I go. And so it has gone for many years.

Every day starts and ends with us. When she is sad, my shoulder is the one she always cries on. When I am hurting, her touch is the only one that I can bear. We laugh together often and find comfort in each other's company even on the hardest of days. We spend countless hours cuddled up at home, hiding from the world in the cocoon of affection and unconditional acceptance we have built together over the years.

We met when I was young, but that was a lifetime ago. Now I am old and full of aches and so very tired. She cries more than she used to lately but I sleep more than I used to so I don't mind the salty dampness from her tears too much. I want to make her laugh so she doesn't feel sad but the medicine makes it too hard to stay awake. She is my everything and I dream only of her.

Now, I cannot do the most simple of tasks without help from Naomi. She has to help me in and out of bed, help me use the bathroom, help me eat, help me take my medicine. I can feel the toll it is taking on her and it breaks my heart. I'm supposed to be her protector, her source of strength and joy. Now I am her burden but there's nothing I can do except hope that this is the dream and maybe I'll wake up soon.

I have to go to the doctor more often now and today Naomi helps me into the car for another appointment. I hate going to the doctor, but it's our tradition to get vanilla ice cream after - just like that first day - so at least there is that to look forward to. I can sense a heavy sadness from her so I give her reassuring kisses and tell her I love her before I resign to resting my head on her shoulder, a crease of worry forming between my brows. This seems to simultaneously bring her comfort and more sadness, but it's all I can offer so I nuzzle in a little closer.

To my pleasant surprise, we stop for ice cream on the way and I get a brain freeze from eating it too fast. Naomi laughs at my brain freeze face, she always says it's one of my silliest and one of her favorites, but her laughter soon disintegrates into tears and then it is time for my appointment.

Soon, we are in the doctor's office and I am on a bed. Naomi is lying with me, holding me close and caressing me while she speaks in hushed tones with the doctor. She's crying but trying not to and then she turns her attention to me, holding my head in her hands and giving me lots of kisses.

“My sweet baby boy.. do you remember the first day I brought you home? When we walked through the park and ate ice cream?” Her eyes go distant as she smiles sadly at the memory. “You had ice cream all over your face like the silly little goober you are and then you gave me the coldest, sloppiest kiss and it was the first time I had laughed in almost a year. You were such a good boy and I knew you'd be the best boy a girl could ask for-” her voice breaks into a sob and I feel the warm drops of her tears in my hair. She takes a shaky breath and leans in to kiss my cheek.

“You were the best boy, Ziggy,” she whispers through the tears, stroking my head. “You're such a good boy. I love you so much, buddy. I'm staying right here and after your shots we'll go get ice cream like we always do, okay Ziggy? You're a good, good boy...”

I'm so focused on Naomi’s touch and voice, and so used to the vet’s poking and prodding at this point, that I barely notice the needle sliding into my arm. A slow warmth begins to spread and I assume it's from Naomi’s tears which now soak my face and shoulder and my eyes get so heavy I can't keep them open.

The last thing I feel is the caress of her hand running through my hair.

The last thing I smell is the vanilla on her breath as she whispers to me.

The last thing I hear is her shaky voice telling me what a good dog I am, how she'll miss me more than I could ever know.

The last thing I see is her beaming face bathed in golden sunlight, laughing at me over an ice cream cone in a crowded park.

The last thing I remember is feeling safe and whole, wrapped in the all encompassing embrace of Naomi's love.