Liz stared hard into the bathroom mirror, trying to find any resemblance of the woman she used to perceive as herself. Sure, the reflection of the petite figure with long brunette curls and bright blue eyes looked familiar, but it was the soul behind the eyes that she didn’t recognize.

“What have you done?” she muttered to herself in guilt. Closing her eyes tightly, her mind shifted to him. It had been six months since the first time they made love. Their initial encounter had been innocent on Liz’s behalf. She’d had no intention of what proceeded to transpire. Their meeting over happy hour cocktails had been muddled with mindless small talk as they stumbled through their agenda, both distracted by the attraction that was generating between them. Their eyes were soft, but focused intently on each other, as if no one else was in the room. One drink led to three, and soon they were both too tipsy to make any sound decisions. As he walked her to her car, the awkward silence was as loud as a New York City street.

“Thank you for the drinks. I think I had one too many though,” she giggled nervously. But as she reached to open her car door, he beat her to it.

“Liz, I should call you a cab,” he commanded, performing the gentlemanly gesture. His assertiveness took her breath away.

There he was, within inches, staring into her eyes, his firm chest covered in a slim fit button-down business shirt. As she looked up at him, there was no denying her desire. His large hands grabbed her face and slid back into her long, dark hair. Pulling her in close, the most delicious lips she had ever tasted were on hers as she felt herself melt into him. Like two teenagers recklessly ignoring all rules and inhibitions, they soon found themselves in her backseat, unbuttoning and unzipping every stitch of clothing in record time. Liz’s legs were wrapped tightly around him as his lips kissed every inch of her they could find. The warning sirens blaring in the back of her head weren’t loud enough to make her stop what was unfolding. She felt him slide deep inside her and neither could help but gasp at how amazing the sensation was.

“Liz, you feel even better than I imagined,” he whispered breathlessly in her ear, sending a chill down her spine that sent her heart racing even faster toward destruction. It wasn’t long before they were both grabbing and clawing, trying to get as close and as deep inside one another as humanly possible. Heavy breathing steamed up the windows, but it wasn’t enough to hide them from the rest of the world. She had crossed the line, one she never dreamed she would trample over. But in that moment, she didn’t care. They looked passionately into each other’s eyes and paused, silently acknowledging their nervous leap into each other’s soul.

He was, and would forever be, her Favorite Mistake.

"Liz? What in the world is taking you so long in here?"

Like a lightning bolt, Liz was zapped back into the present as her best friend, Cassie, slung open the door to the ladies’ room. Music from the band billowed into the small, tiled space as chatter from the wedding guests roared in the distance.

“Sarah and I have been looking all over for you. We thought you fell in.” Cassie laughed a tipsy laugh, but Liz knew Cassie sensed her awkwardness.

“Oh, I’m sorry, Cas. I got a little emotional. You know, weddings. They always make you think back to your own. I went a little overboard reminiscing about mine and John’s wedding day. It’s probably the alcohol making me so sentimental,” Liz nervously justified to her fellow bridesmaid. Faking a smile, she grabbed Cassie by the arm, thwarting any further interrogation, pulling her back into the enchanted bubble of wedding reception bliss. She hoped her rationalization was convincing enough for Cassie. The last thing she needed was a suspicious, prying best friend to chastise her infidelity. She had enough of her own guilt to stifle.

“Let’s find that hot bartender and get another round of those yummy concoctions he whipped up for us,” Liz yelled over her shoulder as the two women held hands, weaving through the crowd of guests. They spotted the bride waving them over to the bar. Cassie seemed satisfied with Liz’s ability to emotionally rally back into celebration mode and for that, Liz was relieved.

“Geez. Where have you been?” The new Mrs. Lutz held up her shot glass and impatiently slid two more down the bar to the previously-missing-in-action bridesmaids.

Clink. The ever so sweet sound of celebration. The three best friends beamed as they toasted the evening, tipping back shot glasses and indulging in liquid caramel heaven.

“To Sarah,” boasted Liz. “May your marriage be as fulfilling as a Bradley Cooper movie, your favorite vibrator, and chocolate chip ice cream on a Sunday afternoon.” Cassie and Sarah laughed and shook their heads at the per-usual cynical and inappropriate toast from the petite brunette. 

“Yes, here’s to Mrs. Hal Lutz.” Cassie smiled endearingly at Sarah, leaning over to kiss her cheek. Sweet Sarah. The giving one. She had the patience and heart of Mother Teresa. She was destined to be the pediatrician out of their physician posse. Adorned in her ivory one-shouldered—goddess style—draped bridal gown, she was Athena on Earth that evening.

“You guys are the best.” Sarah grabbed both of them, kissing their cheeks in maternal grandeur. “I can’t believe this evening is finally here. Did I seriously just get married?” Sarah shook her head in disbelief as the three late-thirty-something, polished, and professional women squealed and giggled, jumping up and down like teenage girls that had just spotted Bieber.

“Girls, I’m sure this is the beginning of a chain reaction of good things to come for all of us.” Sarah smiled compassionately, directing an unintentional glance toward Cassie.

“Yeah, Cas, you know they say it happens when you least expect it. You and Rick are here in this romantic place with plenty of time on your hands,” Liz proclaimed sarcastically while throwing out a sexy wink and hip sashay. “Who knows, maybe you’re already knocked up.” Obviously not believing her own statement nor caring for the potentially unborn, Liz motioned for the bartender, catching a glimpse of Sarah and Cassie’s locked eyes as they acknowledged each other’s observation of her apathy.

“I’m pretty sure that’s a negative, Ghost Rider,” Cassie replied matter-of-factly. “Let’s not bring this up right now. Today is Sarah’s big day.” Cassie raised her arms and gave her best Vanna White pose to frame the open-aired cabana-style St. Lucia venue. “Besides, you all know that I have my cycle down to a science thanks to all of the gazillion fertility apps out there right now. And I’m supposedly fertile starting tomorrow, so Rick gets no action until my fertility app alarm says he can.” Cassie snapped her fingers in true diva style. The three women tried not to look suspicious as the topic of their conversation approached them.

By Cassie’s account, Rick had been fairly nonchalant about the whole family planning process over the past few years. She had on multiple occasions expressed resentment that the stress of it hadn’t seemed to faze her husband. “A typical man for you…completely detached and self-absorbed. I bet he’s loving all of this extra action he’s getting. Of course, Rick and his super-size ego are one hundred percent certain that his soldiers can get the job done. But me and my underproductive, dysfunctional ovaries ain’t so certain, ladies,” Cassie had admitted to Liz and Sarah.

Liz watched in envy as Rick approached his wife like a prowling lion moving toward his prey. She didn’t understand how Cassie could ever muster the strength to turn him down, even if it was to preserve her strict conception agenda. It certainly wouldn’t be difficult getting in the mood to make love to him. He was beautiful with his tall, fit frame and perfectly chiseled jaw line. There wasn’t a woman in the world who would turn their cheek to him, not even Liz.

“Mrs. Lutz.” Rick nodded and bowed, acknowledging the new bride. “Why are you ladies empty-handed? We need to take care of that.” He motioned to the Lucian bartender, unaware of the minute time lapse since the trio’s last round. He then changed his attention to his wife, pressing up behind her, wrapping his arm around her waist and planting a provocative kiss on the back of her neck. Liz heard Sarah snicker beside her. He was bound to get nowhere with his efforts up against Cassie’s uncompromising objective.

“Mr. Buchanon, are you trying to get me drunk?” Cassie accused as she playfully unraveled from his grasp. “I’m certain that you’re not trying to sabotage our fertility schedule. Must I remind you that we have to save your swimmers for tomorrow? It’s game time and I need you to be fully loaded.” Rick grunted in defeat and playfully smacked her backside while Sarah rolled her eyes at Rick’s crude display of affection.

​            The air was knocked out of Liz’s chest as she tried to hide her jealousy. She quickly changed the subject, attempting to regain her internal composure. “On that note, where are those drinks you suggested?” Liz inquired. The prompt return of the handsome bartender carrying three freshly-filled shot glasses was a much welcomed distraction from her covetous thoughts. “What’s this shot called by the way?”

 The tanned and glistening provider of the liquid heaven answered, “A buttery nipple.”

            “Well now, that sounds appropriate,” Rick boasted. “I will leave you ladies and your nipples to yourselves, per my wife’s request.” Cassie gave him a sweet kiss on the lips and a reassuring squeeze of the hand. The three women watched as Rick moseyed onto the dance floor with his proverbial tail tucked between his legs.

“I hate turning down that gorgeous man of mine, but he will get his fill soon enough. I have to stick to my guns, girls,” Cassie chuckled, flashing her best Charlie’s Angels double pistol. Laughter thankfully broke the awkward air of the baby-making conversation. No sooner had the second round of buttery nipples hit the back of their throats, Sarah had Liz and Cassie by the hands, pulling them onto the dance floor. Liz’s heart sank deep into her chest as the all-too-familiar scene brought her back to when their friendship began nearly twenty years ago.

*****

​Eighty-nine nervous bodies gathered in the auditorium. Some lame professor was lecturing on and on about how the next four years would be the best and worst of their lives. Liz looked around at the unfamiliar faces, disappointed and thinking for certain she was the most normal of anyone in the room.

     “Mom, it’s horrible. I’m surrounded by complete nerds. It looked like an ant farming convention in there,” she’d cried over the phone on her lunch break. But to her surprise, the bar at the class social that evening provided the perfect spot for finding some classmates with similarities. Liz, miserable and desperate for a drink, bellied up to the bar next to two other seemingly-miserable females, waiting on their complimentary drinks as any normal, poor students would do.

“Thirsty, ladies?” came a surprisingly charismatic voice from behind her. “I would offer to buy you drinks, but it’s an open bar. Can I at least have the pleasure of ordering for you?” he asked in gentlemanly character. Liz and the charismatic blond made immediate eye contact. Instantly, she changed her mind about wanting to drop out of medical school. He was gorgeous with his wavy, surfer hair and just enough of a tan left from summer to highlight his bright green eyes and perfectly white teeth. Liz vaguely remembered noticing him in the auditorium that morning in orientation. He was by far the best eye candy in the geek-filled room.

“Ugh, I hate open bars. Terrible house liquors and wines, and we all know this is adding to our ridiculously high tuition. I’m Liz, by the way,” she said, extending her hand toward the blond hottie for a proper introduction.

“John Hamilton. Nice to meet you. I assume you ladies all know each other already,” he stated, smiling at Liz and the two women to her right. Liz was so distracted by John’s appearance that she almost forgot she was amidst other company.

“No, we haven’t been introduced yet,” replied the bubbly, wavy-haired blonde. “I’m Cassie Campbell. Nice to meet you, John.” They all three turned to the shy, petite blonde awaiting her introduction. Liz couldn’t help but instantly notice her warm eyes.

“Sarah. Sarah Lowe,” she replied softly, but with a sense of self-confidence. This girl could be fun with a few drinks in her, I bet, Liz thought to herself.

“Now that we’ve all been formally introduced, I propose a toast to Emory Medical School’s class of 2005,” John cheered as he distributed the subpar drinks that had finally been served. They toasted in unison, drinking to their futures, oblivious to how entangled their lives would become.

“Have you guys heard about the new club that opened downtown? I was hoping to break in their dance floor tonight. Something tells me that we’re not going to find too many compadres here to join us.” Liz scanned the room at the stern-faced gunners with their intentions set on being top of their class.

“I agree,” John replied with a smug grin. “Looks like a bunch of damn Tarzans to me. They might as well beat their chests and swing from some branches.” The four of them laughed at the ironic truth to John’s analysis. It was confirmed that they were way cooler than the rest of the people in the room and so decided to ditch the scene and head into downtown Atlanta to Cosmopolitan.

Cosmo’s was where their friendship story all began. It was eerily similar to this evening with the four of them drinking and dancing—besides the perfect St. Lucia venue, of course, and a few more wrinkles on their faces and dollar bills in their wallets. But their friendship had been tainted. There was no way to hit the reset button. And Liz didn’t know if she would do that even if she could.