Oh, what a beautiful morning.

To awake each morning with the excitement of knowing the day ahead is filled with all that brings pure joy and soulful contentment sounds simply divine, doesn’t it? Sadly, though, it is a day that most only yearn for.

But why? Is it not within everyone’s grasp? It costs nothing monetarily. Unfortunately, the perception seems to weigh heavily in favour of the belief that it is an impossible life to attain. Worse yet, most people hold the heart-wrenching illusion that they are undeserving of receiving this joy and contentment. If one only knew the simple secret to living this way is learning self-love, and self-love is simply always looking for things to feel good about.

Respecting and listening to ones inner voice, learning how to feel better and honour those feelings in that moment. That is what I believe self-love is.

When you wake up, what is the first thing that you do? What is your first thought? First movement?

Do you awaken to the sounds of nature, whether outside your window with the sun rising or to an alarm clock set to birdsong (better than nothing, I’d say!)?

Or do you awaken to a loud buzzer that startles you to the point of being slightly shaken? Perhaps you have tried both? Fair enough. But which feels better?

Do you stretch from your fingertips to your toes before your feet hit the ground with a grateful awareness of your very human existence beginning yet another glorious day or

Do you stumble out of bed move in the direction of the washroom, and stub your toe for the tenth time this week only to start your monotonous morning routine?

Do you open your eyes and give thanks for all the wonderful things you have in your life and all that the day will offer you or does your mind wander to the dread of your work day, a relationship you are struggling with or a mound of bills that you must figure out how to manage let alone pay.

We know challenges can exist or arrive every day. However, we also know that we have a choice in our perception of them, and in that intended choice, we can experience the outcome very differently. More so, once we are aware, the results of our choice are much more supportive and favourable: How we choose to feel about the challenge, be it a situation or being, will, in turn, create the experiences that will unfold thereafter.

Picture this for a moment if you will…

a middle-aged man in the middle of the room moving around in a fast-focused manner with seemingly no reasoning whatsoever…

Then, nine people sitting in the room surrounding him all become aware of his actions.

Who do you think will have the correct interpretive story or perceived reality of what he engages in? None or all?

The truth is that all will perceive the reality of what he is doing from their belief system, interpret and then express it accordingly. Simple. The challenges arise when we feel we are responsible for convincing the other person that what we see is the correct narrative. However, some may be more easily influenced to veer away from their own perceived narrative ( from their truth), perhaps due to a lack of self-love, confidence in and awareness of their strength. Regardless, everyone will form their perception based on what they see and feel about the situation in front of them, rooted in their very own belief system.

What do you think will be their reality and experience as a result? Do their opinions of his actions matter to him if he chooses not to let them matter? In this instance, do his actions affect them unless they allow them to?

When asked what he was doing, he said he was dancing to his favourite band, period.

When three people sitting together were asked what he was doing they all had an opinion that he was mentally unstable. Even though one of the three initially thought he was dancing, the views of the others mattered more when it came to the final judgment.

Three more were asked, and they replied that he was so cool, free spirited, being a fool dancing away the night. Although one of the three we learned thought he was a little on the crazy side too, until convinced otherwise….

The other three? Well, they decided after they discussed his behaviour that he must be drunk and/or on drugs. It’s interesting how much time humans spend concerning themselves with other people’s business. No wonder we have that ‘care what everybody thinks’ hang-up.

The bottom line, no matter the opinion of anyone in that room it did not affect the man in the middle dancing because he did not allow it to. However, had he been concerned about any of their opinions, he probably wouldn’t have enjoyed dancing to his favourite song nearly as much, if he even danced at all. You get the point. right?

If not directed, we will form our own opinions based on what we perceive but are heavily influenced by our core belief system. If anyone in that group watching decided in their view, that this dancing man was ‘crazy’ and could harm them, the situation in the room could have changed easily. It would continue to unfold for everyone differently based on their focus and acceptance of the ‘everybody’ aka collective opinion.

So, returning to waking up in the morning, if you are still with me, in those beautiful first moments, which of the above waking scenarios would feel better in your mind?

The bottom line is that, without question, how you start your day every morning will be reflected throughout the rest of your day, your week, your month and even your year.Your choices to always move towards feeling good create the next moments in your experience every time, without exception. So, does it not make sense to ensure you feel good or at least move in that direction every day, even amidst significant challenges?

The big point of all this nattering on is to help you understand that self-love is about your ability to use your feelings as guidance not just sometimes but every single time.

Unless you become aware and start to change those emerging thoughts that are always associated with feelings that create, your life will continue as it has been. So what does that mean? 

Well, it humbles me if you are currently experiencing happiness and living a life filled with pure joy and soulful contentment. I am grateful for you and hopeful that you will lead, teach and share your gifts with anyone ready to receive them. Thank you for bringing your beautiful seasoned energy to these pages.

Or perhaps you are like a few who do know, those who get it but still enjoy the gentle reminders a little book like this can offer. However, if you are, like most, yearning daily for more or even a glimpse of joy, then it’s time for self-love, or at the very least, a step in the right direction on that path. 

It’s time you live YOUR journey… 

It’s time you understand

that how you do one thing… 

is how you do everything.

To experience the change we long for, we must stop doing what has not worked, get rid of the old way of thinking and doing, and commit to a new way that offers self-respect and kindness and honours oneself.

It’s time for self-love.

I think we can all agree that no matter what situation or challenge we are dealing with at the moment if it is perceived only negatively, with hopelessness and being overwhelmed, our ability to be happy or find joy is greatly diminished.

It can be frustrating when we are amid great angst only to hear the oh-so-common phrase “think positive” or just “be happy”. But truly that is the key. Even more challenging is when we lack self-love in that moment. Then feeling positive can be an uphill battle; sorry to say, the lip service just doesn’t cut it in the self-love and creation department. However, here’s the kicker: That’s okay, as all you need to take is the first step. That step is understanding that YOU (no one else) control your life and that joy and contentment will find you when you are ready to start feeling good.

And guess what?!

You have already taken that most important extraordinary first step, as you are reading this little book now. So start. This time, though, mean it and commit (you know what I mean).

The secret to living the life we yearn for is changing our every thought and inspired action to support ourselves. Learning self-love is embracing the most supportive direction we can take to achieve this life. With this little book, I hope you permit yourself to adopt self-love as part of your day, your life, and your being.

Following each chapter, you’ll notice an area

for you to begin your ‘pen to paper’ 

if you feel so inspired.