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Not your usual serial-killer story, but a compelling and elegantly told tale from a convincing narrator

Synopsis

A disillusioned young woman. The world she’s lost faith in. And the killer she comes to love.

Sometimes abrasive, often at odds with others, but mostly just ill at ease, Elliott struggles to feel a sense of place or purpose in life. When a fateful night of insomnia leads to a chance encounter with Jason, a volatile relationship begins between them. Despite herself, Elliott finds Jason’s steadfast acceptance of her invigorating and she lowers her guard, settling into the everyday comforts of their dynamic. 
 
But as Jason earns Elliott’s trust, she learns of his troubled past and a chilling detail—he’s a serial killer. Yet the shock of the revelation fades. And while Elliott embraces their shared animosity towards a broken world, she gets caught up in his lifestyle, and her own instabilities ignite. Grappling with the truth of who she is and what she’s capable of, will Elliott realize she’s gone too far … or not far enough? 
 
Gutted is a story of alienation, human frailty, and the choices that define us.

Note: Gutted is the first book of a series. The sequel is forthcoming.

Elliott is a survivor of an abusive family. She has escaped them, but what she went through growing up has ‘resulted in the gutted, empty state I lived in on a daily basis.’ When she meets the enigmatic Jason one sleepless night at the all-night diner, there’s an immediate connection. Learning about Jason’s murderous past (he thinks the term ‘serial killer’ is unimaginative) doesn’t stop her from pursuing their relationship, but as that past becomes present, Elliott has to decide what she can live with, and what she is prepared to do.

 

Elliott’s voice is an effective one, delivering the unusual story effectively. The portrayal of the almost hypnotic quality of Jason’s attraction for her was particularly well-done: you could really feel how she was pulled into the relationship. She isn’t always an especially sympathetic character, sometimes coming across as self-pitying and as rather unconcerned about the moral issues with Jason’s behaviour, but she is consistently an interesting narrator.

 

The only downside I found to Gutted was the rather sudden ending. I am as much of a fan of an inconclusive ending as the next person (Daphne du Maurier’s My Cousin Rachel is a favourite), so the way that Madorsky avoids wrapping everything up in a neat, Dickensian bow isn’t the problem. My issue with the ending is that it leaves major issues unexplored, not least the interesting question of how far Jason’s account of his rules for murder is actually true. Is he less principled in his selection of victims than he makes out? And if so, does that mean we can trust any of the story he has told Elliott about his past?

 

Madorsky’s decision to leave the reader hanging on these points left me feeling disappointed as well as intrigued, but it was the only flaw in what was otherwise a compelling and elegantly told story.


Note: I've subsequently been told that this is the first in a series, so hopefully these loose ends will be addressed in the next book. I still feel though that even the first in a series should leave the reader feeling satisfied with the ending so far, as well as gagging for the next installment.

Reviewed by

Elaine Graham-Leigh is an activist, historian and qualified accountant (because even radical movements need someone doing the books). Her science fiction novel, The Caduca, is out now and her stories have appeared in various zines. She lives in north London.

Synopsis

A disillusioned young woman. The world she’s lost faith in. And the killer she comes to love.

Sometimes abrasive, often at odds with others, but mostly just ill at ease, Elliott struggles to feel a sense of place or purpose in life. When a fateful night of insomnia leads to a chance encounter with Jason, a volatile relationship begins between them. Despite herself, Elliott finds Jason’s steadfast acceptance of her invigorating and she lowers her guard, settling into the everyday comforts of their dynamic. 
 
But as Jason earns Elliott’s trust, she learns of his troubled past and a chilling detail—he’s a serial killer. Yet the shock of the revelation fades. And while Elliott embraces their shared animosity towards a broken world, she gets caught up in his lifestyle, and her own instabilities ignite. Grappling with the truth of who she is and what she’s capable of, will Elliott realize she’s gone too far … or not far enough? 
 
Gutted is a story of alienation, human frailty, and the choices that define us.

Note: Gutted is the first book of a series. The sequel is forthcoming.

Introduction

My formative years didn’t so much scar me as gut me from the intestines out like one lethal claw swipe by an enraged grizzly bear. So by the time my path crossed with that of the equally unwhole and marginally more unwholesome Jason Stillman, the fact that he ritualistically killed strangers seemed little more than one of life’s exercises in morbid poetic symmetry. 

   I’d like to make a disclaimer here at the outset of this peculiar story that I am as reliable a narrator as any. You may not agree with the nature of my feelings for Jason—in fact, you may feel a certain disgust for our relationship, but its salience in my life is an immutable fact. I only hope to relay it with some coherency, and I ask to be forgiven for any installments that may feel like a train wreck of badly stitched-together reflections. It was, after all, a lot to absorb. And at the end, if you are still compelled to play judge, jury, and executioner with me, don’t hesitate. Just remember I’ve already survived being gutted at least once. 

   I avoid using the term “serial killer” because he hated it. He felt the word serial indicated something bland, repetitive, lacking in passion and imagination. He argued that a serial number on a DVD player cannot convey the full experience of all the hours spent and all the emotion stirred in just a string of nondescript digits, and I agreed. That was one of many satisfying things we had in common: a deep respect for language. Many cups of coffee at the all-night diner would be emptied and refilled during impassioned conversations detailing theories of the precarious rise and impending fall of language in human civilization as the world around us continually monopolized and bastardized it in a bid for control of our minds and perceptions. 

   After all, what one family called “love” resulted in the gutted, empty state I lived in on a daily basis. At least when he killed, the evisceration was not preceded by the mandatory family rhetoric claiming to love, cherish, and protect.

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About the author

Anna Madorsky was born in Leningrad, Russia. Part of the wave of Soviet Jewish émigrés, her family settled in Houston, Texas. When she’s not writing or educating others, she makes music, some of which has found its way into film and TV. She enjoys nature and unwinds with a good show and cup of tea. view profile

Published on May 16, 2023

Published by

80000 words

Contains mild explicit content ⚠️

Worked with a Reedsy professional 🏆

Genre:Psychological Thriller

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