The Greyhound breathed cold, sterile air on the near comatose passengers. Vivienne folded further into her seat, her forehead resting against the window despite the chill. She traced a single drop of rain across the fogged pane with a fingertip. Her backpack rested in the seat beside her, a sentinel against the few others that remained on the tall and narrow bus. After a moment, the raindrop flicked away, and Viv dropped her hand. She resettled her black hood atop her head.
The bus had shed more and more passengers as the vehicle wended its way south along I-5, until only Viv and three others remained. The bus driver, a weary but capable woman in her fifties, switched on the PA system.
“Hard Luck, Oregon, in five minutes.”
The PA switched off with a sizzle.
That was her stop. Viv forced herself away from the bus wall and gathered her phone, earbuds, and wallet into a tidy pile before tossing them into her pack. She watched the trees and the underbrush along the road thin, becoming less dense, less green, as signs of human habitation took over. Billboards stood stark against a dark gray sky and promised great grub at Honey’s Diner or a cozy stay at the Hard Luck Motel. As the Greyhound sliced through the outskirts of town, a worn wooden sign welcomed newcomers to Hard Luck, Oregon, established in 1898. The bus slowed, coming to a stop in front of the foretold Honey’s Diner.
The PA switched on again. “We have arrived in Hard Luck, Oregon. If this is your stop, please gather all of your belongings before leaving the bus. Greyhound is not responsible for lost or stolen items.”
Viv joined the short line to get off the bus. Outside, the rain-laden air was damp against her skin. She smelled exhaust, and the cold tainted air stung her nostrils. Viv pulled her hoodie tighter around her body. She watched a mother and a daughter with matching dark rims around their eyes wrestle four enormous suitcases off the bus, struggling to move them onto the nearby sidewalks. Viv eyed the pair. Grief and envy snaked through her. They look exhausted. But at least they have each other.
Once they stepped away, Vivienne ducked into the carriage hold and grabbed her large, navy hiker’s backpack. She waved off the bus driver’s attempt at assistance and shrugged the pack onto her shoulders, holding the smaller backpack in her hands.
Viv felt her phone vibrate and glanced at the screen.
A text from her uncle: At Honey’s Diner. I grabbed a booth.
Viv took in the restaurant in front of her. Well, she wouldn’t have far to walk.
The diner was busy. A line of people trailed out the door and into the parking lot, which housed trucks, Suburbans, and motorcycles. Viv stepped inside, dodging the line and the irate glares cast her way. She searched for her uncle, inhaling the scents of deep-fried foods and coffee.
He sat in a booth by a window, chatting with a man seated nearby. They sported similar outfits: jeans and work boots, with plaid flannel over a worn T-shirt and a baseball cap over thinning hair that had seen thicker days. Viv trudged through the aisles, dodging a harried waitress with a stained apron and ugly sneakers. Stopping in front of her uncle's table, she waited for a pause in the good-natured conversation. After a moment, the stranger in the next booth cast her a sideways, skeptical glance.
Viv knew what he saw: a rail-thin teenager with long brown hair and black eyes, in a black hoodie and blacker jeans, decent work boots — a gift from her uncle — and weighed down by an incongruous hiker’s backpack so full it strained at the seams. Silent and dark, she stood out like an inkblot in the colorful noise that echoed through the diner.
She waited.
Without turning to Viv, Rick spoke. “Tell Honey I'll have the number two.”
“I don't know who Honey is, Uncle Rick,” Viv replied.
Her uncle stilled with recognition. His eyes twinkled as he stood up to hug Viv. She returned the hug with a tight embrace of her own. Not a tall man, Rick seemed even shorter than she remembered. His auburn hair, a family trait on her mother's side, had faded in his middle age, but his enthusiastic manner of conversation, punctuated by wild hand gestures and boisterous laughter, remained the same. Viv remembered how his often bawdy sense of humor had offended her father. Her mother had enjoyed his silliness, though. Viv remembered the pranks Rick pulled in the hospital to cheer her mother up during treatment: rude noises made by balloons and machines, snakes that sprung from a can… Her mother would chuckle until she started to cough. Then her father would frown at Viv and Rick until they fell quiet.
I haven’t seen Rick since the funeral, Viv realized. It’s been a year.
Rick stepped back. “Good to see you, kiddo. Sit down, sit down.”
Viv tucked the hiker’s backpack into the booth, then slid herself onto the bench seat opposite her uncle. The tabletop was sticky with soap residue. She winced to herself. I hope it’s soap. The waitress with the ugly shoes came to collect their orders — a Rueben sandwich and a burger — before Rick leaned across the table.
“How was the ride down?”
Viv shrugged. “It was quiet, for the Greyhound.”
“No trouble at all?”
Viv shook her head. “No. Cold, smelly. It could have been worse.”
“Did your father see you off?”
“He dropped me off at the station.”
Rick frowned at his hands on the table. “Well, how is he?”
Viv rolled her eyes. “Like you care.”
Uncle Rick chuckled. “We’re not besties, but we both love you.”
“You can admit it, he’s kind of an asshole.”
“Hey.” Uncle Rick’s voice sharpened with disapproval. “Be respectful. He’s still your father.”
Viv stared down at the tabletop, her teeth grinding together. Her dentist had wanted her to wear a nightguard. Viv hadn’t cared enough to tell her father; that was the least of her problems.
“Vivienne.” Her uncle gentled his tone. “I’m sorry to be short with you. You both lost your mother, and I feel for him. It’s not easy.”
Viv looked up. “You mean, it’s not easy to lose your wife and gain a loser for a kid.”
His lips firmed into a thin line. “That’s not what I meant. At all. I’m just saying the man means well.”
“I got a Reuben and a burger here.” The waitress and the sandwiches had arrived.
Grateful for a distraction, Viv dug into her burger. They ate in silence. Viv was pleasantly shocked by how good the food was. Or maybe I’m just hungry. She hadn’t expected much from Hard Luck, Oregon.
As the food dwindled away, the tension returned. Viv fiddled with a French fry.
Rick broke the silence. “You ready for this, kiddo?”
Viv studied him. Worry marred his face, and his thick auburn brows pleated with concern. His beard had so much silver that he had a roan rather than rust coloring.
He deserves the honest answer. “Probably not.”
He let loose a gravelly laugh. “That’s comforting.”
Viv gave a half-smile. “How did you even find this program, anyways?”
Her uncle sipped from his coffee mug before answering. “Working for the Bureau of Land Management, I encounter a lot of third-party contractors and nonprofits tied to land conservation and stewardship.” A pause for another sip of coffee. “Your program is loosely based on the Civilian Conservation Corps from the 1930s, part of the whole New Deal environmental initiatives. But it’s different because it focuses on helping kids get back on track, expunge their records, and the like.” He focused on Viv, his tone hard. “From what your father shared with me, this program is your only chance. Don’t waste it.”
Viv dropped her French fry onto the plate as a tremor shook her hand. She leaned back against the booth seat, grateful for its solidity. She thought about her nights in the juvenile center in Portland, only weeks ago. After the first night on the thin, hard mattress, she simply didn’t sleep. She couldn’t relax. She didn’t trust any of the others in the ward. Viv had napped during the day, but that was hit or miss. The concrete walls, tile floors, and metal bars across the windows had wrapped around her like an unwanted quilt. The very air had tasted of astringent cleaners, body odor, and somehow, anger.
Then there were the other girls. One of them, a large girl with unnaturally yellowed hair and teeth, had pinned Viv to the wall and breathed foul imprecations into her ear while choking her with a single hand. The ward guard had been slow to intervene, irritated by the extra fuss rather than concerned for Vivienne.
She hadn't stopped shaking that day.
Viv had almost sobbed with gratitude when her father picked her up a week later.
He hadn’t noticed anything unusual. But then, he never did these days. Not since the funeral.
Viv refocused on her uncle. “I only have to get through these six weeks, right? Then I get to go home?” She cleared her throat. “I don't go back to the detention center?”
She saw sadness seep into her uncle’s gaze, like he could see inside her head. “This program is literally a Get Out of Jail Free card. You just got to do the work, okay?”
Viv nodded.
Her uncle cleared his throat. “You want something else to eat?” he asked with forced cheerfulness. “You’ve got to put some meat on those bones if you’re gonna do trail work.”
Viv shook her head.
Her uncle checked his phone. “When do you check in with Helen Whiteaker?”
“4:00 p.m.”
“We should get going then.”
Uncle Rick carried her hiker’s backpack as they walked to the Bureau of Land Management office and commented on the limited points of interest in the small town. Many of the buildings along Main Street were decorated in the Wild West tradition, with false balconies on the second floor and signs inscribed with Ye Olde West typeset. They strolled down the old-fashioned walkway, covered in wooden beams fixed together in a snug fit. A large billboard of a miner with a pan of gold rose above the main drag of shops and stores; the town's main street doubled as the freeway that wove through it. The overall result was a calculated attempt to cash in on the nostalgia for the town’s historic appeal.
A tourist trap. Aside from the tourism angle, the town seemed to have one of each establishment: one diner, one general store, one hardware store, one gas station.
Viv shivered. The day had grown chilly.
“Wait.” Rick’s sudden command interrupted her thoughts. “Your sponsor. For NA. They know you’re here?”
“She knows. We text and talk when we need to.”
Rick seemed doubtful. “And that will work for you?”
Viv shrugged. “It will have to, won’t it?”
Rick lapsed into silence, worry and skepticism veined across his face. Viv studied him with a sideways glance, and her heart sank within her chest. He doesn’t trust me. Not anymore. She swallowed hard the sadness that tickled up her throat.
Fog had settled on the mountains surrounding the town, cloaking the green with gray. Just past the post office, Viv saw the Bureau of Land Management office. Reminiscent of a log cabin, the building was obviously built to retain the rustic Old West aesthetic, with a low roof and log walls. Only the small metal overhang that projected over the glass double doors modernized the structure. The American and State of Oregon flags flew at top mast, rising from a manicured lawn.
They paused before the double doors.
Her uncle scrutinized her. "If you need anything, you call me.”
Viv nodded. “Sure.”
Uncle Rick dropped her backpack, then wrapped Viv in another hug. He smelled of Reuben sandwiches, coffee, and soap, and his beard was soft against her forehead. Viv leaned into him, grateful for the warmth. He felt like home. She hadn’t felt that sense since her mother had passed.
“You're gonna be fine.” His voice was gruff as he released her. He sounds like he’s trying to convince himself.
Viv didn’t respond.
Time would tell, wouldn’t it?
