BOOST YOUR POTENTIAL
At this very moment, someone is talking about you. It could be your boss, a colleague, or a customer. Perhaps it's your spouse, your child, or a parent. Someone, somewhere, is speaking about you behind your backāand they're all wrong. They believe they know who you are, that you're set in stone, unchangeable. It's just "your personality," they say.
We are going to prove them wrong.
The idea that "we are who we are" is a pervasive myth that has deeply influenced our lives, families, communities, and society. You've probably taken a personality test, looking for insights on how to communicate, collaborate, and tolerate different personalities. Not long ago, we believed that our brains stopped developing in our mid-twenties. However, neuroscientists studying neuroplasticity have thoroughly debunked this belief.
These scientists have shown that our minds can continue to develop throughout our lives. This understanding led psychologists to create adult development theories, which have been widely applied in leadership development.
Through these scientific breakthroughs, we now know that what we often call 'personality' isn't fixed. It's just a stage in our ongoing developmentāa stage I refer to as "Potential." In this book, Potential isn't just a theoretical concept; it's your capacity to lead with growing effectiveness. Just as we once saw personality traits as unchangeable, we now recognize behaviors as expressions of Potential. By changing our behaviors, we can transform our Potential, leading others to see us as having 'changed' our personalities.
The notion of 'full Potential' has also been overturned. Our brain's ability to form new neural pathways means we can continuously push beyond what we once considered our limits. This was emphasized by Anders Ericsson, a Professor of Psychology and author of Peak. His work, which inspired Malcolm Gladwell's Outliers, provided a foundational understanding: "The brain is far more adaptable than anyone ever imagined. Thinking of people as born with fixed Potential no longer makes sense. Potential is an expandable vessel."
This book aims to do more than debunk myths. It's designed to help you understand the various stages of Potential. You will identify your current stage, learn how to advance to the next level, and continue growing. This journey isn't just possibleāit's within your reach.
The CEO Conundrum
Ari is the CEO of a tech company with 1,000 employees in the bustling San Francisco Bay Area. In his late forties and married, Ari is also a father to three teenagers on the brink of college.
He is constantly stressed about the future of his company. Debates with his executive team weigh heavily on him, making him feel as if the entire burden of the business is on his shoulders. At home, his relationships mirror his professional struggles. He finds it hard to connect with his wife and increasingly rebellious teenagers, and his attempts to maintain parental authority seem futile.
Ari's days are filled with lengthy discussions on business strategies, while his evenings are consumed by parenting debates with his wife. Mid-life burnout feels inevitable as he struggles with little success on multiple fronts. Two questions haunt him daily: "What's going on?" and "How can I fix this?"
Despite the chaos, Ari remains hopeful. He believes in a better version of himself that can set things right, though he hasn't figured out how to unlock this Potential.
As his company grows, its complexity increases. Rapid technological changes bring both opportunities and threats. At the same time, his personal life becomes more complicated. As his children navigate adolescence, their unpredictable behaviors challenge Ari and his wife's coping strategies.
Ari longs for simpler times when clear solutions exist for most problems. Now, he finds the landscape overwhelming, with countless approaches to each issue. While he believes he knows the way forward at work and home, aligning everyone with his vision remains difficult.
Increasingly, Ari relies on his authority more than he'd like, leading to feelings of inadequacy as both a leader and a parent. He recognizes that people resist decisions imposed without consensus and regrets his impatience in discussions.
No longer wanting to be the smartest person in the room, Ari is frustrated when stress drives him to revert to old, inauthentic behaviors that contradict his values.
At work, Ari deals with opinionated executives; at home, he faces stubborn family members. Both realms demand his attention, but he struggles to excel in either. Although Ari has charisma and influence, his patience often wears thin, leading him to assert unilateral power. Each time, he feels regret and believes he has failed as both a leader and a parent. In these moments, he confronts the limits of his current Potential.
The CEO Transformation
Fast forward 18 months, and everyone interacting with Ariāat work and at homeābelieves he has developed a 'new personality.' The truth is, he hasn't changed who he is; he has upgraded the 'operating system' that governs his behavior. He now views situations from perspectives that were once out of reach.
Today, Ari processes complex ideas with ease, drawing from diverse and often intangible sources. He reconciles conflicting viewpoints and integrates various systems and strategies effortlessly. Energized by his purpose, vision, and values, he revels in his newfound courage and authenticity. His leadership, now aligned with his values, greatly enhances his self-worth.
Ari has transformed his communication abilities. He engages in genuine dialogues with peers and family membersāconversations that were impossible 18 months ago. He now gives and receives feedback effectively, offering critiques without putting others on the defensive and considering advice he previously ignored.
Conflicts, resentment, and resistance dissolve around him. People commit firmly to decisions, allowing him to hold them accountable without coercion. His visionary capabilities foster new collaborations, reducing the need for him to impose his views.
His teenagers appreciate the changes in him. They approach him openly, feeling heard, valued, and respected, even when they disagree. His empathetic listening has revitalized his marriage, offering a fresh start to a relationship that was once in decline.
Ari has created an environment where people at work and at home speak freely and act authentically. This deep connection with his team, board, and loved ones reveals an expansive new capacity to achieve more. He feels fulfilled and rewarded, having evolved into a better version of himself.
Write Your Transformation Story
If Ari's story resonates with you, you're not alone. If it inspires you, you're exactly where you need to be. Transcending your current Potential can have a lifelong impact.
This book will guide you in transforming your consciousness, effectiveness, and performance. I'll introduce you to the seven levels of Potential and explain how each level impacts your effectiveness and performance. Using this framework, you'll identify your current Potential and learn how to elevate it for yourself, your team, and your organization.
Leaders often feel overwhelmed by the many personal, team, and organizational development frameworks available. A unified framework promotes consistency and harmony.
Do you often feel lost or struggle to piece things together as they constantly shift? Enhancing your Potential aligns opposing forces and resolves conflicts in complex strategic decisions without relying on unilateral power.
The framework in this book has helped my clientsāCEOs, executives, and their teamsābecome extraordinarily effective amidst hyper-complexity.
Walk in the Park
I thought my promotion to CEO would be a walk in the park. With a dose of arrogance, I believed I could handle the job effortlessly, even with both hands tied behind my back.
I was profoundly wrong.
After three years as COO, a lengthy board deliberation promoted me to CEO. I had already taken on many CEO dutiesāso what could one letter in my title change?
The difference was monumental. I had underestimated the shift when all my former peers began reporting to me. I hadn't anticipated the complexity of managing twelve board members, each with their own vision of what kind of CEO I should be.
If navigating these new professional waters wasn't challenging enough, unforeseen problems began to surface. It seemed like everyone was against meāthe executive team, the board, business partners, and even the economy, as we entered the 2008 Great Recession. Misconceptions about my compensation caused unrest among my team, while rumors of layoffs destabilized the organization.
I blamed everyone for their apparent lack of support. My wife grew weary of my constant complaints. It never occurred to me that I might be the problem. I had reached the limits of my Potential, though I was unaware of it then.
The role was both familiar and utterly different. The multi-layered relationships were more complex and crucially more important than I had realized. I had not yet evolved my consciousness to the level required for a CEO of a multinational company.
Three months into my tenure, I hit rock bottom despite reasonable business growth and promising new product lines. My leadership team, composed of my former peers, demanded a heart-to-heart conversation. They were blunt: "Dave, we are fed up because you aren't listening to us."
Their feedback mirrored that of my wife, Ainsley, who said, "Dave, I don't feel heard." Given that Ainsley avoids confrontation and my team does not, their aligned complaints were a clear signal that I needed to listenāand act.
I realized my issue wasn't just about performance. I had behaved like a general, failing to collaborate across the company's ecosystems.
The turning point came when I finally took ownership and decided to change. I began to observe, reflect, and act based on those reflections. Progress was slow and painful. I didn't have a coach or know the most effective ways to alter my behaviors. I was blind to the underlying fears, mindsets, assumptions, and belief systems driving those behaviors.
It took another five years to make substantial changesāstill far from what was expected of a global leader. Only years later did the pieces of my leadership puzzle begin to fall into place after I learned about developmental models and underwent developmental 360Ā° assessments. I wished I had known about the faster, more effective path to growth earlier.
I realized that my challenging first year as CEO stemmed from a subconscious need to prove my worth. This need drove me to push myself and others excessively hard. Here's a quick illustration:
During my first annual convention as CEO, I revamped the marketing team's presentation for a product launch, aiming for the most impressive debut ever. I modeled my presentation after Steve Jobs' iconic iPhone launchānot original, but effective. The event was a "success," and I basked in the recognition I craved.
However, months later, quality issues emerged. Responsibility slipped through the cracks because it was "Dave's product." My controlling tendencies had strained team relationships, and the product ultimately failed.
My fear of inadequacy led to assumptions and beliefs that hindered true leadership. Despite my reputation as 'Dave the Brave,' earned from years as a fighter pilot, my inflated ego, both from my military career and corporate roles, did not serve me well in thoughtful leadership.
After a diverse career across various countries and sectors, I continue to piece together leadership lessons from my past. The Leadership Potential Indicator assessment revealed I was only midway through the Potential continuum. This humbling insight has driven me to dedicate my life to reaching what I call Unitive Potential and helping other leaders accelerate their transformation.
This book is not just about personal growth; it aims to create a ripple effect of unity in a divided world by expanding leadership Potential. The framework you are about to learn transcends individual, team, organizational, and societal levels.
I've documented transformative changes and high performance in teams and executives. I've coached at companies like eBay, Netflix, Airbnb, Marvell, 10XGenomics, Stripe, FICO, Bill, Intuit, Udemy and Dolby, among others. This book shares the impact of this work on thousands of leaders worldwide, demonstrating the profound effects of expanded leadership Potential.
Let's Get Started
Now that we've set the stage, it's time to dive into transcending your Potential. I offer my unconditional commitment to your growth, avoiding the usual clichƩs found in 'transformation' books.
But before we proceed, I need your commitment. Are you ready to do whatever it takes to transcend your Potential? True transformation demands dedication and accountability. This journey is not for the faint of heartāit's a life-long path.
This book supports your growth, one Potential level at a time. The development process spans years, making this book more than a one-time readāit's a lifelong guide. Let's get started. Together, we'll explore the depths of your Potential and transform your effectiveness and impact.
