Chapter 1

“My fellow Americans: I am very humbled yet emboldened by your vote to elect me as your president. I thank you for your support. I’ve earned your vote, and I will now embark on the task of securing your continued trust. I intend to do that by delivering on the promises I made during my very contentious campaign with Secretary Goodman. To accomplish these promises, we, the people, have to be vigilant and bold. We have to take this country in a new direction.

“This new direction starts with securing our borders. Under our current immigration system, our borders are porous, wide open for drug dealers, rapists, murderers, and terrorists to enter our country unchecked, able to move about freely to do all kinds of terrible things to law-abiding citizens. Other countries are not sending the best and brightest to our country. They are dumping ‘human toxic waste,’ and it is my job to clean up the mess. 

“Furthermore, my ineffective predecessor has enacted recent unconstitutional restrictions on our citizens’ right to bear arms through a series of illegal and unethical executive orders. These restrictions have left our citizens virtually defenseless against deadly, terrorist threats. 

“My first order of business as your president will be to rescind these executive orders, restore full Second Amendment rights to our people, and encourage all of our law-abiding citizens to purchase weapons to defend against the scourge caused by our current, extremely ineffective, immigration system.

“My second order of business will be to secure our borders. No longer will drug dealers, pimps, pushers, rapists, murderers, or terrorists be able to freely enter our country through our southern border. I will build a second-to-none border defense system across our southern border, impenetrable border walls, and I will make Mexico and South America share the cost. I will do the same along our northern border. Canada will pay for our northern border defense system and help police it. If either or both refuse, we have ways of convincing them to ante up. These countries, indeed all countries in the free and not so free world, rely on trade with the United States. We are their largest customers and trade partners. Let’s see if they prefer tariffs on all goods entering the United States of America. We also provide serious aid and military support to many of these countries, and they will soon begin paying for that support or it will be terminated. There will be no free rides from the John administration.

“The third order of business will be to beef up law enforcement in this great country of ours. We will increase border security and immigration and naturalization enforcement. We will create a new federal police force within the Department of Homeland Security answerable only to its secretary and to me. This force will be the finest of its kind and will be tasked with protecting our citizens from foreign interests seeking to destroy our country and our citizens.

“We will make America beautiful again. We will modernize our airports. We have the worst airports. Third world countries have better airports than we do. We will make our country’s airports the biggest, brightest, most technologically advanced, and beautiful airports in the world. We will repair and replace our crumbling roads and bridges. Our crumbling infrastructure will be replaced using state-of-the-art equipment manufactured right here in the good ole USA.

“We will put America back to work again, as these tasks will be performed by American-born workers. Advanced technology systems will require workers with twenty-first-century advanced technological skills. In with the new, out with the old, I say. Our natural resources will once again take center stage in the global economy. No more political correctness in energy production. We will put people back to work in Pennsylvania and West Virginia and produce energy for our people at a fraction of current cost. How will we do this? By producing energy right here in America and curtailing our dependence upon foreign sources, especially those sources that sponsor terror. We will focus on price and American pride rather than the junk science and political correctness, which has driven up the cost of our energy and ignores resources we can mine for-profit and supply to all corners of the globe. It is high time for America to assume its rightful role as a global energy leader.

“Finally, we will round up and deport all of those who have entered into and remain in this great country illegally—round them up and toss them out. I have no use for criminals, and these illegal immigrants are a huge part of the criminal element that makes all of us law-abiding citizens less safe in this country. 

“We will combat terrorism and the global terrorist threat by taking the war to the shores of the terrorists and by banning all current and future immigration from any country I deem to be a sponsor of terrorists and terrorist activity. And, we will create jobs by assembling and training the best and the brightest national immigration and deportation force in the world. We will beef up federal, state, and local law enforcement departments, which will create more law enforcement jobs, manpower necessary to tackle the problems of local, state, national, and international crime. It is time to prioritize safety in this country. We will be the law and order capital of the world.

“We will make America safe again. We will make America strong again. We will put America first again. We will make America secure again. We will make America prosperous again. We will make America pure again. With your help and God’s will, we will succeed in making America a shining city on a hill once again. Thank you . . .”