Self-help

The Needs of the Heart

By

This book will launch on Dec 19, 2020. Currently, only those with the link can see it. 🔒
Synopsis

First time Author Phillip Anderson writes a self help book through a Introspective lens. In this book, he discusses emotions and principles he believes will enrich the lives of others and make society better because of it. He discusses how in times of need, principles are what guide people past the point they cannot see. While logic, critical comprehension and intellectual reasoning are important, emotions and principles are just as important as they are the guiding force behind our actions. Without them, people individually and humanity in it's entirety would have never become better than the mistakes of its past.

Love

There is a place in our hearts that knows only darkness. There is a place in our hearts that can only accept the hate, the pain, the fury, the vengeance, the loneliness, and the bitterness given to it. There is a place in our hearts that thrives on negativity. It clings to us; it yearns for us to accept it. For its appeal is easy, its results instantaneous, but what it has in store for us will destroy us. Negativity preys on us when we are weak, when we are beaten, when we are let down. It presents itself when we are at our most vulnerable, when we are confused, yet frustrated. It presents itself to us as a source of strength that will eradicate all that pose a threat to us. When we have known such negativity for so long, it is the only course of action we are aware of and the only thing that we believe makes us feel alive. When we experience it, it brings forth all that we have locked away, all the malice and evil we have suppressed for the sake of appearing good on the surface. Negativity can twist our own perceptions in an instant, turning friend into foe and foe into friend. It reasons with us to make it seem as if the light is the dark, and the dark is the light. Once we accept it into our hearts, we become corrupted by it. It takes all that is good within us, all that is decent in us, all that is moral in us, all that is of a positive nature within us and destroys it.

Such negativity knows only hate. Such negativity knows only pain. Such negativity knows only anger. Such negativity knows only rage. Such negativity knows only how to destroy, how to kill, how to wound, how to hurt. All it knows is of a ravish nature, a brutish nature. When we allow negativity into our hearts, it obliterates all of our virtue. Thus, it will seek to destroy all that is around us. Like a storm, it will consume all in its path. It will devour all that lies in its direction. It will take in all that is kind, gentle, pure, innocent, and of a caring nature and leave behind nothing but chaos. The more we embrace it, the more it consumes us. The more we feed into it, the more it saps from us all that made us good. Like a wildfire, one ember from it can spark the fiercest of flames. Negativity can touch the hearts and minds of those far and wide. It can unite people in ways that good never could. It can move the masses in ways unthinkable to the logical individual. It can make people do things, commit atrocities, they never knew they were capable of. It can bring out the savage within them, the brute within them, the feral beast within them. It can take away all logic, all reason, and any shade of morality a person thought they possessed. Like any drug that does damage to the body, it feels good at first. It creates a state of euphoria, it makes us feel as if we have reached the absolute heights of human pleasure.

At first, we do not notice the toll negativity will exact from us, but by the time we realize it, we are too late. We have become addicted to it. We have become reliant on it, dependent on it. While we thought it would help us, in the end, it only made us lower our guard and be the agent of our own demise, forever a slave to something that has penetrated deeper than what the body could ever feel. By the time we are ready to mount an attack to overcome such a plague, we realize that it is too deep. Negativity connects with us in a way that we cannot live without. Its penetrates to a level that is linked to all that we do. Its merged into a realm of our being that is the epicenter around all that we find meaning. For darkness knows the consumption of light. Darkness knows the absence of truth. Yet the opposite of darkness is light. The opposite of negativity is positivity. And the opposite of hate, is love.

Love, the center of the human emotional spectrum. Of all the sensations in this spectrum, love is the most powerful. When one thinks of love, they think of affection. When one thinks of love, they think of a soul mate. When one thinks of love, they think of a connection that runs deeper than the eye can perceive, what logic can comprehend, and what the human intellect is able to quantify. Love is pure and kind. Love is gentle and sweet in its touch. Love is so simple and yet so powerful. Love is something that is simple, yet complex in nature. For the power love holds is that it is the driving force behind all that we do. It is love that gives way to passion and passion that gives way to commitment. And it is the commitment to what we believe in that affirms or reaffirms our beliefs by way of action. It is love that is the driving force of all we do. It is in love that passion is found. It is in love where intimacy resides. It is in love where the most powerful bonds are forged. What makes love so special is that love cannot be perceived as materialistic things can be perceived, yet we know it is there. Love cannot be seen, heard, touched, smelled, or tasted, yet we know that love is the guiding hand that can wipe away every tear, hear every cry, be the comfort we need when in pain, and be the source of our strength to guide us in our darkest hour. At its core, love is simple. It is not found in extravagant wants or desires. It does not need a high level of social prestige to be accepted by the individual.

At its core, love is found within the heart. It is not found in dollar bills. It is not found in fancy jewelry. It is not embodied, epitomized in the form of sex. It is found within the heart. It is found within the hearts of those who share it intimately. Love can be found in the king of kings as well as the lowest of peasants. Love can be found within the mad man as well as the rational man. Love can be found within the sinner as well as the saint. Love can be found between those who have so little and those who are known to have all that is attainable by the decrees of the world. Yet no matter where love can be found, its true strength comes from the understanding of those who share it. True love comes from the acceptance and the understanding of the two who share it. It comes from the acceptance of their faults, their flaws, their short-comings, the insecurities of their partner, and the growth that comes out of it. Such a perspective does not come from the crowd, the standards of others, or the opinions of society. It does not come from the masses or, the ideas of the times, but from the longing of one’s hearts. Love can only be attained by a person when they understand in their heart what it is they call love.

Love may have one definitive meaning, yet at its core, it has an endless depth. Love cannot be quantified, calculated, or measured by the degrees of human intelligence. Love has no limit; there is no limit to what an individual will do in the name of love. There is no boundary, no line a person will not cross to protect/defend/cherish whom they love. Love is something one does not know but feels. It is something you cannot tie to a specific date or point in time, but a feeling that grows more and more as one chooses to embrace it. It is something that you can feel when you have it. It comes from a deep place, a special place, an intimate place, a childlike place in our hearts. As paradoxical as love is, it is something we all need yet deny ourselves. Therefore, a question that all people must ask themselves (but never get the chance) is this: What does love mean to me?

Love is what makes a man lower his masculine guard, and love is what allows a woman to express her femininity. Love is what can bring together two people from different walks of life and allow them to understand each other in ways that would imply they knew each other their whole lives. Love is what can give two people the courage to do what others would consider impossible and make a way when there is no way. Love is what makes a house a home. Love is what makes a meal at the table a memory to be savored for a lifetime. Love is what makes a neighborhood a community. Love is what makes a group of people of the same blood or of different backgrounds a family. Love is what gives sex that much more passion and intimacy. Love is what makes the hardships endured worth going through. Love is what makes going through hell for those we love worth bearing. It is in love that we understand we are human and not machines. It is in love that we cry, we feel, we embrace, we fight, we long for/yearn for something that materialistic possessions could never give us. It is in love that life can be created a-new. It is in love that a moment of pain can be a memory by which an everlasting bond can be forged. It is in love that all we do has meaning. It is in love that one word, one action, one thought can give way to something totally beautiful. It is in love that beauty can take form. It is in love that passion can rise. It is in love that intimacy can be such a binding, powerful, sensual, and unexplainable force housed between those who share it. It is love that makes a king’s reign over his people truly justified. It is love that connects people to their leader and a leader to their people. It is love that connects a parent to their children. It is love that makes a husband put his wife before anyone else and forsake all others. It is love that makes a wife love her husband before anyone else and forsake all others. It is love that brings a husband home to his wife every day and night, and it is love that brings a wife home to her husband every day and night. It is love that cooks a meal that can feed a whole family. It is love that is found in each ingredient. It is love that keeps a family together, and it is love that allows the lessons learned from one generation to be passed on to the other. It is love that allows a man or women to accept a child that is not theirs by blood but love them as if they were their own. It is love that gets a parent up early in the morning, to go to work day in and day out so their child can have more than what they could ever have had. It is love that allows us to call something sacred or precious to our hearts and regard it in the way that we do. It is love that can allow a man who has known nothing but negativity his whole life to be easy around the women he loves. It is love that allows a woman who has been hurt by so many to put her trust in a man that she loves and allow him to be the head of the household. It is love that allows a compassionate heart to give back to those who know only selfishness. It is love that makes everything seem possible. It is love that makes a parent stand up to defend their offspring in the face of certain death. It is love that makes us human, that gives us the ability to feel something more than baser instinct and impulsive desire. It is love that makes people more than the machines they create. If we could but search our own hearts, we could see that at some point we can no longer live only for ourselves, but also for others. If we could look within ourselves, could we come to the realization that such an emotion, such a feeling, such a deep and intimate part of our human nature is not a weakness, a hinderance, but a source of our strength? For without love, what are we?

Love, it is so powerful yet always misunderstood. Is love truly sacred? Is love something that speaks to the higher state of being an individual, where they can achieve, if they choose, to be more than their baser instincts? Is love part of the human soul? Does love have to come from a divine place or a divine entity? Was love intended for us mere mortals to have? Were we meant to possess a force so powerful, so rational yet irrational, beyond our comprehension? Were we truly meant to wield such a powerful yet deadly force? As lovely, gentle, sacred, kind, and pure love is, how do we know if the love we seek in our hearts can not only be shared, but understood in the eyes of others? How does a person truly know when they have found the one for them? How can a person know just by looking at another person that they have found true love? Even if we have feelings in the moment for another person, how do we know that such feelings will last forever? How does a person know if their views of love can be embodied the same way by the person they love?

Everyone has wants, desires, dreams, goals, aspirations. Everyone has their own opinions, points of view, ideas, interests, conceptions, perceptions of what something is to them and what it means to them. Many follow the ideas of the era as to what love means. Some people love one another based on what can be obtained, quantified, and calculated. So many see it only in the form of sex. And so many do not know what love is to them. Living by the ways of the world, it is easy to lose oneself to the ideas and perspectives that guide humankind. In trying to fit in and conform to the modern era, we so easily forget what we deeply cherish and neglect our true feelings. So many are romantic and regard love in such an idealistic fashion, but with time, become realistic and pragmatic. So many want a house, a wife, a husband, and a family. But adhering to the norms and philosophy of a society that emphasizes extravagance can cause an individual to see love in the same manner (Over time, this can force them to neglect their view of love for one acceptable to society). So many see life in a lavish manner, yet to them love is simple. They do not desire love to be so over the top that it loses its elegant touch. Yet the demands of their lifestyle and perspective on life are in conflict, causing uncertainty in how they should go about love. They are conflicted by their environment, their desires, their wants vs their needs, their expectations, the expectations of others, and the demands of the current situation, all of which prohibit them from taking the time to ponder what it is love means to them. Love is so misunderstood because it is put into a box. Love is a need of the heart. Love is a longing of the heart. Because love cannot be seen, love cannot be bound. Because love has no end to its depth, there is no image of how it should look or who can find it. Love is not bound by race. Love is not bound by religion. Love is not bound by sex. Love is not bound by color. Love is not bound by region. Love is not bound by socio-economic status. Love is not bound by the traditions of the past. Love is not bound by the ideas of the times. Love cannot be bought, compromised, sold off, nor bargained with. Love is not something that separates two people but brings them together. Love is found in the heart, and because every human being has a heart, every human being is capable of love.

Within the human being is something powerful, something rational, something that no machine can ever feel from its depths because it does not possess it… that is the ability to love. Love is an expression that is too raw to capture, yet it is sophisticated. Love is something that is diametrical, of a dual nature, a contradictory force that is known yet interpreted differently by the light and the dark. Yet love comes from a childlike place in our hearts, an idealistic place that refuses to accept things as they are and to pursue them for what they mean to us.

Love is something that so many deny due to the cold and pragmatic ways of the world. Love is something so many reject and neglect within themselves so as to avoid heartbreak. So many numb themselves to love that they may never feel it. So many have not experienced a love of their own for so long that they may never understand what love is for themselves. So many have come to accept a common consensus of what love is that they may never find it on their own. So many have been tainted by lust that they may never know the difference between the two. No matter how much we deny it, love is something that we all need. Love is something we all long for and desire. While lust is a void that can never be fulfilled, it is love that makes us whole. Yet we settle for lust, for satisfying our base desires. Are we wrong for doing this? Are we wrong to give into the desires of our flesh as they are as much a part of us as the capability to feel love, an emotion that runs deeper than anything we can ever explain? It is the love that we leave behind for our children when we are gone that they remember us for. It is the deeds done in love that people remember us by. It is love that draws others closer to us. It is the deeds done out of love that commands respect. It is love that makes everything we do genuine. It is love that reminds us that we have a heart. No matter who we are, what rank or title we have, what number of resources we have access to, what level of social prestige we may acquire, we all desire love. We all desire that companion who can understand us, know us, see us, love us in a way that only they can. We all want the warmth, the affection, the intimacy, the passion, the attention that only a soulmate can give us. We dream about it from the time we know what it is, we long for it as we get older, and the urge gets stronger the older we get. Yet, we must take the time to understand what love means to us on a basic level, on an individualistic level. We must each search the depths of our own hearts to understand who we are so that we may discover what love means to us. We must learn to let go of what is commonly known or accepted as love and come to our own comprehension of what it is before we compare it to the views of the world. It is only when we have reached our core, our depth, the essence of our soul that we can truly understand our character. And only at that point can we understand what love truly is.

About the author

Phillip Anderson was born in 1995 in Queens, New York. Phillip Considers the pursuit of character, self-discovery, and living a spiritually fulfilling life most important to him. He is a middle school Substitute Teacher positively impacting the minds of the future generation in his community. view profile

Published on December 08, 2020

Published by

70000 words

Worked with a Reedsy professional 🏆

Genre: Self-help

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