She’s great at spinning yarn. Her parents are Christians. But she’s also unforgiven. Or is she? Rosa doesn’t think God will forgive her, not when she’s done the wickedest thing on the planet. She abandoned what her parents taught her, and now her life is riddled with hopelessness. But a weird prophetess from the land of Pootin’ tells her there is hope in a mysterious box . . . if she’s willing to cross a gulch to find it.
Rosa goes on a daring adventure, but a strange man named Emmett claims God will forgive her. Why should she trust him when he admitted to murdering someone? That’s not the only strange thing. Rosa’s food is mysteriously eaten from her backpack, a tumbleweed turns into a black figure, and she's surrounded by horseback ghosts trying to claim her soul. The Graven Kings.
The Bible said God would forgive her, but she still has painful feelings in her tummy. And when everything she worked for turns into shams, her only hope is to believe God's mercy or die by the Graven Kings.
She’s great at spinning yarn. Her parents are Christians. But she’s also unforgiven. Or is she? Rosa doesn’t think God will forgive her, not when she’s done the wickedest thing on the planet. She abandoned what her parents taught her, and now her life is riddled with hopelessness. But a weird prophetess from the land of Pootin’ tells her there is hope in a mysterious box . . . if she’s willing to cross a gulch to find it.
Rosa goes on a daring adventure, but a strange man named Emmett claims God will forgive her. Why should she trust him when he admitted to murdering someone? That’s not the only strange thing. Rosa’s food is mysteriously eaten from her backpack, a tumbleweed turns into a black figure, and she's surrounded by horseback ghosts trying to claim her soul. The Graven Kings.
The Bible said God would forgive her, but she still has painful feelings in her tummy. And when everything she worked for turns into shams, her only hope is to believe God's mercy or die by the Graven Kings.
I can't believe it! I can't believe it!
That phrase kept running through Rosa's mind as she rode her dad's scooter home. It was 9PM. People were still walking. Some groups of men waved at her from their wooden kiosks on the side of the road, hoping she'd bargain with them as she usually did. That's the way it was in Rahu: people stayed up late to sell stuff. But Rosa passed them without looking up. She wasn't in the mood to buy; she wasn't in the mood to talk. She wanted to get home.
She needed to get home.
The faster, the better.
After securing the scooter with a chain in a parking lot, Rosa ran through the narrow pathways between homes until she found hers. The patio lights stared at her, and her father—an old-looking man with a white beard—didn't even raise his head from the book he was reading.
“Good,” she whispered. The last thing she wanted was for him to notice the anxiety in her voice and ask what happened. Rosa tried to sneak past him, but once she grasped the iron handle of their wooden door, her father looked up. Rosa's eyes shot around before she stabled them and smiled.
Her father smiled back, his white mustache flipping upward. “Back already? How was the party, my dear?”
Rosa gulped by accident. “Fine. Thanks for asking.” But she opened the door and closed it behind her, probably leaving her father wondering why she was rushing away.
It was dimly lit inside the home. Rosa kicked off her sneakers and walked along the stony floors, passing her mother in the kitchen cooking dinner.
“Had a good time, sweetheart?” her mother asked, dicing something on a cutting board.
Rosa blurted, “Yes,” and then went upstairs to her bedroom. God, I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry! Her heart felt burdened, and bitter tears were sure to gush out her eyes when she fell into bed. What have I done?
Her thoughts snapped when she found her two older brothers sitting on her bed playing a video game. Her video game. They had burned all their money on other things, so when she bought this new 'basketball game,' they were always on top of her, begging her to play it. Stealing it. “Get out of my room,” she shot with a frown. “I need privacy.”
“What's privacy?” her eldest brother joked.
“I don't know what that is,” the younger replied.
Rosa was seventeen, and her brothers were adults now, going off by themselves, working, and getting on her nerves with their jokes. But they didn't mean to hurt her feelings; Rosa just wasn't good at taking jokes sometimes. Especially not tonight, she thought with a grunt. Then she snatched a gaming joystick from her younger brother, tossed it on the ground, and yelled, “Get off my bed! Please.”
“OH!” the younger brother cried. “You made me lose the ball!”
Rosa pushed him. “Is this anyone else's room?”
“It's my room,” her older brother replied with a smile. But when he glanced at her, he stood and wiped his hands on his pants, probably seeing her wrath and wanting to escape before an argument broke out. “She's right. Come on, Josh, I got something else we can do.”
Her younger brother peeked at her but turned his eyes away. “Sorry, Rosa.”
Rosa didn't say anything until they were gone. She shut the door, turned the light off, and slammed herself on the bed.
Tears soaked her pillow.
Her belly jiggled as she quietly sobbed.
“What have I done? What have I done?” she mouthed. Tons of thoughts swarmed her mind, but there was one question she didn't want to think about. Should I tell my parents what I did? Back and forth she went until she decided to keep her mouth shut. Keep her secrets under the rug. She'd be punished if they found out about this filthy transgression. This giant mistake they told her over and over not to do.
She did.
Just a few minutes ago.
“God,” she cracked, “I'm . . . I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Can You forgive me?” Of course, God could forgive her. Her mother always said everyone failed at some point and needed to confess their sins and repent. But Rosa wasn't sure. Could God forgive the hardest, dirtiest sins? “I can't believe I let myself do this,” she whispered. “God, please forgive me.”
Her heart was racing. Her face was blushing. If anyone opened her door, then she would cover her face with the blanket. It was better to look weird than to tell what she did. But there was another problem: people who held stuff in and didn't talk about it became bitter and solved the issue wrongfully, digging themselves into a pit that would eventually destroy them. Unforgiveness. Pride. Loneliness. Numerous types of pits.
Rosa knew all about it; her parents taught her well. But now she didn't feel like a Jesus girl. She felt unclean. Phony. Lost. Why did she have to go to that party? Better yet, why did she let herself sin when she knew it wasn't right?
I'm never going to tell anyone what happened.
Suddenly, her bedroom door squeaked open. It never did that before. Rosa covered her head with the blanket to show her father she didn't want to be bothered. “Can I be alone for a few minutes? Please?” she tried to say without cracking. But then she heard footsteps coming closer, and a gentle hand touched her shoulder.
“God doesn't love you anymore, my dear,” a deep voice said.
Rosa's heart suddenly throbbed. That wasn't her father. His voice wasn't that deep and chilling. His voice didn't vibrate her bones like this. Rosa peeked out of the blanket, turned her phone's light on, and twitched at the sight of a man wearing a black robe. He had a bald head and a clean face. His smile showcased his yellow teeth—one of them was broken.
Then the man inched toward her ear and whispered, “You failure. You broke every rule that your parents taught you. God hates you. Why don't you kill yourself and . . .?”
Rosa whacked his hand away, reached near the wall, and grabbed a wooden bow hanging from a nail. A leather quiver was beside it, containing sharp arrows. The figure backed away with wide eyes. Then Rosa shot him in the neck, causing him to stagger. But when he didn't disappear, she grabbed more arrows and shot him three times until he vanished like a ghost. “God has forgiven me. I will not kill myself,” she said while shooting.
That thing was an evil spirit.
Rosa was used to this. She fought demons every day with the Word of God, stopping them from making her bitter. That bow had been in her bedroom since always—from the time she was born, perhaps. It came from Jesus. He gave those weapons to everyone who served him, but it would only work with prayer and faith.
Rosa slammed herself on the bed and clutched her bow tightly. Her heart was racing after the encounter. She should have known the intruder wasn't her daddy. The door doesn't squeak like that anyway. But at least her parents taught her enough to pray. However, the devil wasn't one to quit. Her accuser would be back one day.
All I need to do is pray and repent, she thought.
But how long could she keep this up?
*
3 years later
This was the best place to sit. After Rosa heard loud cheering outside, she quickly grabbed a chair, sat near the window, opened the twin glass frames, and rested her chin on her palm. Her rather goofy neighbors were watching soccer again on their giant television. Rosa could see it well from her window—and this was the finals by the way they were shouting.
She sighed with delight. Not only was she happy to see the forty-year-old men hopping around like kids, but she was glad they were the ones paying for a subscription. A sports channel subscription. And since their homes were so close, Rosa could see all the matches without paying a dime. Sleek.
She didn't have much to spare anyway. Soon after she turned twenty, she bought a small house with one bedroom. It feels cheap, she thought, looking around her bedroom and comparing it to her neighbor's. But at least she wasn't under any parental rules. Like a free chicken. Until it gets fried for dinner.
Suddenly, all the men jumped up when their team made a point. Rosa leaped up, too. That was her team—many of them were residents of this city.
Then a ringtone made her look toward the bed. Rosa complained, got up, and grabbed her phone. “Hey, Mom,” she said while sitting down and catching her breath. “Mom? Mom? Are you okay?”
Her mother sounded far away, but Rosa could hear her yell, “I gotta go!”
She chuckled. “Mom, must you leave me hanging?” Rosa shrugged and went back to watching the game, but a stinkin' advertisement was on. She grumbled and hid her face. Besides, her parents taught her not to look at advertisements because sometimes they were bad.
She kept her hand over her eyes for a while . . . until hot wind bounced between her fingers. That was funny. It wasn't windy. And actually, it felt more like hot breath, like someone was breathing on her. Rosa looked up to see a man standing close to her window. He was wearing a black suit and a black tie. He had black hair that was cut short on the sides but thick on top. His black beard scared her the most; it covered his whole face like a bush.
Rosa's hand fell as she tried to gather her thoughts. “Oh. Um. I. Gee. You?” She paused, looked away, and then sighed. “Excuse me. I was just leaving.” Rosa grabbed the two window frames to close them, but the man stuck his hands inside and stopped them. Rosa grunted. “Are you standing here for a reason?”
The man licked his lips and replied, “Ya stole twelve dollars from your friend when you were fourteen. Ya friend never knew you did it.”
Rosa twitched but couldn't find any words.
“Ya passed gas once and lied that it wasn't you. Ya even forgot to pay your . . .” Rosa tugged on the frame, but he tugged back. “Listen: ya even forgot to pay your light bill!”
Rosa raised her voice to mimic his. “That's not true!”
“Eh? What? Ya yelled at your parents one time. Ya did a rude gesture at a rude driver; ya know ya in the wrong.”
“You are so lying!” Rosa tried to shut her windows but couldn't.
“Ya want to know what else I know about ya?”
“Leave this planet!” she shouted, placing her phone on her lap so she could pull harder.
The man nodded. “Ya even cuss under your breath,” he raised his voice, “WHEN YOU KNOW IT AIN'T RIGHT!”
“Okay, I've heard plenty enough!” Rosa was about to run away, but the man reached inside and grabbed her phone. “Not my . . .!” she begged, eyes wrinkled with concern. Then her shoulders slumped when she remembered her mother was listening. Mom can't hear this!
But the man held the phone to his mouth and yelled, “Hey, Mama?! Mama?!”
Rosa punched the air and stepped closer. “You would not!”
“Mama! Guess what I know about ya daughter?” Then he started repeating everything he said earlier.
Rosa scanned her small bedroom in hopes of finding something to throw. All she had was a heavy book on the shelf, but that wouldn't do much. Her bow was hanging on the wall above her bed. But it might not work. So she stepped closer and clawed for her phone. “MOM, DON'T LISTEN TO HIM! HANG UP THE PHONE! HANG UP THE PHONE!”
But the man backed away and said, “And Mama, ya daughter did something really stupid when she was seventeen.”
Rosa gasped. Did this man really know who she was? Did he know what she did? Of course, he doesn't. Either way, she needed to cut this conversation off. Somehow.
“It's really silly, by the way,” the man went on. “And you told her not to do it, but she did anyway. Hey, Mama, I'm just gonna let the whole world know. Because I feel that . . . What? Hey!”
Rosa pushed her body out of the window, covered his mouth with one hand, grabbed her phone with the other, and tackled him at the same time. Once they hit the cobblestone road, the man bit her hand so hard that Rosa felt her skin explode. “MY JESUS!” she screamed, wanting to cuss but unwilling to make this man's accusations sound true.
Right after she screamed, the man pushed her away and fled down the narrow roads between the homes. Rosa wasted no time to climb through her window and shut it. Then she locked herself into the bathroom and sat against the tub. “Oh, Jesus! Oh, Jesus!” she whispered.
Two of her fingers were bleeding, so she snatched a stray towel and patted them. Then she grabbed her phone and whispered, “Oh, Mom, please tell me you didn't hear that. Please.” Rosa sighed and put the phone to her ear. She cleared her throat and tried to sound normal. “Mom? Are you still there?”
“Yeah.”
Rosa's heart throbbed, and her head fell back by accident. “What did you hear?”
Her mom stuttered. “Uh . . . nothing. I just got on the phone . . .”
“Come on, Mom, be real with me. What did you hear?”
“I am real; I didn't hear a thing.”
“Not a single utter?”
“Not a single utter.”
Rosa sighed with relief and prayed her mother was telling the truth. “So you didn't hear anything?”
“No. I just came back from the bathroom. Why?”
“Uh. Nothing. In fact, could you give me a few seconds . . .” Rosa looked around for the perfect lie. “My phone battery's going out . . . I just need . . .” Rosa ended the call and turned her phone off. Then she grunted and scrubbed her hurting fingers with the towel. Why did this have to happen? Hopefully, no one else heard what the man was saying.
Rosa fell on her shoulder and panted. That was close. That was too close. And not only that, she'd just told a lie about her phone battery, something her parents told her not to do.
Something Jesus told her not to do.
Her belly tightened. Rosa began crying as she thought about her past. She wasn't the perfect candidate for God; she didn't feel like a Christian. Not anymore. That man seemed to know everything about her, everything she did wrong, everything she regretted. And he almost spoiled the biggest sin of her life.
He's crazy, that's what.
Thankfully, she stopped him in time before her mother found out. Then she whispered, “Jesus, I almost cussed again. I-I-I. I'm sorry. What have I done? Can You still love a girl like me? Can You?”
The Holy Spirit reminded her of John 3:16. 'For God so loved the world that he gave his only son. Whoever believes in him will not perish but have everlasting life.'
Surely, that proved how deep God's love was, how powerful He was to forgive sin, but Rosa cried even harder as she believed one thing.
“I've failed too many times. God, you couldn't love me.”
The Holy Spirit replied, Rosa? Why believe lies? And why are you thinking your bow doesn't work?
Is anyone beyond God’s love? Are there any sins God won’t forgive? These are some central questions and themes swirling throughout this action/adventure novella.
The main character in this “spiritual warfare” novella is Rosa. She’s made some kind of giant mistake. Wracked with guilt and despair, she hears a deep voice saying “God doesn’t love you anymore, my dear.” It’s coming from a creepy bald-headed guy in a black robe. As Rosa’s story unfolds, we begin to understand that the epicenter for her current state of despair occurred at a party some years ago. Will she believe God forgave her, or is God still angry with her?
Rosa rabbits. On the run, she’s beset by the black-robed guy and his minions. Think ring wraiths from The Lord of the Rings. Emmet shows up and teaches her how and why to do battle. Rosa eventually learns how to fight Graven’s accusations and defeat him. There’s also the power of a loving, praying mom. A noble white horse named “Courage” and a sweet little lamb named Georgie. How even the deepest wounds and most egregious mistakes are not beyond the healing power of God’s love.
There’s also rescue, repentance, and redemption. Trickery. Deception. Fear. Shame. A truck load of guilt. Dark hooded mounted demons. (Think ring wraiths from The Lord of the Rings.) The Sword of the Spirit and the Shield of Faith. Love, joy, and hope. Power perfected in weakness. Amazing grace. Stubborn love. And Home.
The first few chapters were a bit confusing. It's almost as if the characters have been tossed in a blender, pureed, and poured onto the page. Things level out and smooth out around chapter 4. So be patient. The story picks up and gathers steam as Rosa’s adventures continue.
Some readers will appreciate the numerous biblical references. Others may find it a bit preachy. Also, Rosa’s near-constant refrain of “Nobody loves me, everybody hates me, think I’ll eat some worms” goes on and on and on. It gets old. Fast. The redundancy may turn off some readers When Rosa doesn’t seem to learn anything from prior lessons or experiences and has to re-learn them again and again, some readers may tire of the repeats. (Don’t worry. She gets it eventually.) The continuous repetition of key phrases and concepts also wears thin. (We got it the first 267 times, okay? No need to beat us over the head with it.)
The text would benefit from a professional edit. Examples: “Armored gantlets.” How be there are horses out here? Put. Put. Put, the bike screamed. Some scenes strain credulity. Like Rosa stopping in the middle of an intense fire-fight to text her mom? Seriously? But these issues are minor and don’t detract from the overall read.
Don’t miss the Afterword. Here the author explains how “This story is symbolic of real life, illustrated so that you can understand how Satan operates and tries to mislead us.” It does well in this regard. Biblically literate readers will understand the bows and arrows and that “Graven” is symbolic of Satan. The Afterword also includes a chapter-by-chapter outline of key concepts “so you can understand how this story applies to life.”
Rosa and the Graven Kings has good potential. It’s a little The Pilgrim’s Progress. A little This Present Darkness or War Room. The writing is heartfelt, energetic, and earnest. With some more elbow grease and another coat of polish, this action/adventure story can become a highly readable and informative novella.