Self-love is not a waiting game. Who are you today, and how can you honor that person with love, support, and self-acceptance amid struggle, confusion, lost loves, career shifts, health crises and all the beauty and complications of life? We never reach perfect perfection; we are just perfectly imperfect people that are fabulous in our complexities.
I have been that island girl running barefoot in her yard, the confused immigrant trying to navigate primary school in a new country with her very strong Jamaican accent, and the African-Caribbean-American student trying to find her identity and place on the college campuses of Penn State University and Boston College Law School. I have been the introvert trying to figure out how to function as a lawyer when I hate meetings, small talk, and being in the spotlight. I have been the “living life like it’s golden” girl—restaurant hopping, Caribbean carnival seeking, free-spending, with a live-and-let-live spirit. Speaking of Carnival seeking, I have played mass for two days in Trinidad in full costume, going two days without sleep to enjoy the festivities, and I have been to Carnival in Jamaica and Barbados, and I have taken road trips to almost every city in the United States (Miami, NY, Baltimore, DC, Atlanta) and Canada (Caribana) that had a carnival. Most of us can’t be placed in a box, although society tries awfully hard to do so.
I appreciated being the carefree 20-something, the career-driven young adult just looking for the next ladder to climb—and now, the single mother of three boys. My mission is to try to manage home life and work-life as an administrative law judge without losing all my hair and finding some time for my writing, which has always been my passion. I have fallen many times and struggled to find my way back up, but with each fall, you learn that you are strong and resilient and love and appreciate yourself a bit more. Be grateful for every step on your journey and always root for yourself.
is a journey from
will they like me to
will i like them to
i am who i am
no affirmation needed
i am enough.
Eventually, you get to the point in life where you declare: I am who I am, I love me, and there isn’t much, if anything, that I want to change about myself. I am open to personal growth, but I fully embrace where I am on my journey. Wow! The road to this type of confidence and self-acceptance is usually long and rocky. Along this road, try to be mindful of every step, be kind and forgiving to yourself. See each mistake as an opportunity to learn more about yourself and the world. Use your mistakes as stepping stones to a higher place, and celebrate every victory—both the ones that you labored for and the ones that the universe blessed you with. Don’t compare yourself to others because no one else is on the same journey. Most importantly, love who you are today!