Hot sex. Naturally. Hot sex is understood universally. No translation needed. Hard. Wet. Eager. Carnal. It’s the biological design of the human body, but that won’t come naturally unless we care for it.
The million-dollar question is: how do we nurture great sex? How do we ensure that our bodies consistently experience optimal sexual function? The answer lies in the very foods we eat. Great sex is certainly an experience of the mind. Within our bodies, though, it explodes when our nerves, blood vessels and hormones operate in synchrony. Modern research has shown that diet affects this trifecta of great sex. It can increase or thwart pleasure.
Ancient Chinese medicine has always known this. Through diet and lifestyle, we can restore balance to yin and yang—and nurture the essences of sex. Here modern science and traditional wisdom merge, showing the pathway to great sex. When our bodies are well-nourished, desire comes naturally, pleasure comes naturally, and orgasm is effortless.
Diet for Great Sex unlocks the secret to promoting blood flow, hormonal balance and strong nerve singling to and from our genitals. In caring for our bodies this way, we unleash all that is possible from our own sensual physiology.
It was their third date. Based on the steamy texts and innuendo they’d shared for weeks, Carla and Dan knew that sex was in the cards tonight. But as they flirted their way through chicken alfredo and crème brûlée, they both began feeling a bit nervous about the main event. After all, it would be their first time exploring their sexual compatibility, and that was always a gamble. They arrived at his place and headed straight for the bedroom, falling into the sheets. Their desire and enthusiasm led the way, but as they undressed, something else took over.
Immediately, Dan couldn’t help wondering what Carla was thinking as she gazed at his body. It would be easier for her to see my dick if my gut weren’t in the way, he thought, suddenly hearing a lifetime-long chorus of dick jokes materialize in his head. Does she think I’m inadequate? I’m sure her other boyfriends were packing way more heat.Suddenly he noticed his sheets smelled rank and hoped she didn’t notice too. He moved to start caressing Carla’s naked body, making his way down between her legs.
As for Carla, she really liked Dan, and hoped he liked her just as much. She wanted the sex to be perfect, but as his hands made their way down south, she became increasingly self-conscious about what he was thinking.
Carla, suddenly conjuring a highlight reel of perfect porn-star genitalia snapshots in her mind’s eye, imagined Dan would discover she was less waxed, bleached and youthfully sculpted down there and more like a finely aged USDA beef—dry aged. The juices weren’t flowing on command. She knew climax for her was far more likely with a long-term boyfriend, as it is for many heterosexual women, but she would’ve been more than good with successful penetration. He probably thinks I’m not into sex. Frigid. That’s just what turns a guy on, a woman who can’t get off. Her libido had always been on the low side, too, which had led to a lot of frustrated partners in previous relationships.
Thanks to the wine with dinner, they did finally make it to sex, doggie style. Here, Dan felt a bit awkward again. What to do with his hands? Should he grab her hips? Ass? Put them on his own hips? Go slow? Try a bit of roughness? He caught a glimpse in the mirror of his gut slapping against her ass and cringed. His erection began to soften.
This was a new development. When he was twenty, his erections had been like concrete at the mere hint of sex, but now he had to work at it a bit more, and at a recent check-up, his doctor said that his testosterone was low.
Dan and Carla were certainly experiencing first-time sex jitters, always a possibility between new partners. But as an acupuncturist and herbalist, I saw something else lurking in those sheets: hormonal imbalance, which was affecting their game in bed. Their dinner — fatty, salty and rich—was just the sort of food that was working against their efforts at pleasure. Because diet affects hormonal balance, nerve integrity and vascular health—the holy trinity of great sex. And a crappy diet will hamper the physiology of great sex faster than Dan can grab a cold shower or Carla can hope her vibrator batteries still have life left in them.
***
I treat patients like Dan and Carla in my acupuncture practice, where I work with clients individually and as couples to cultivate healthy nerves, healthy blood vessels and hormonal balance. I treat patients with acupuncture but always combine this with an individualized dietary strategy to support sexual function as this is the single best way to maintain sexual health.
Acupuncture, an ancient Chinese form of healing therapy, operates on the nervous system, stimulating nerve pathways to improve sexual function. The nervous system in turn, affects the levels of every substance produced by the body. Science has shown that acupuncture affects a broad range of chemical messengers from dopamine, norepinephrine and the fight-or-flight hormone cortisol, to histamine, a compound critical in immune response. Sexually speaking, acupuncture has also been found to affect both free and total testosterone in the body,[1] as well as estradiol, a form of estrogen, both of which are key players in our sexual function.[2]
Medical jargon aside, though, the takeaway is simple: Hormones affect sex, and diet affects hormones. Certain dietary habits improve hormonal balance, while others derail it mercilessly.
So even when you address the insecurity, unfamiliarity, lack of skill or good old-fashioned nervousness that plagues us all from time to time in the bedroom, hormones and diet are two critical elements of sexual function. When ignored, they can make for bad sex. But tame them both and you unlock the key to sexual satisfaction. (Though you’ll still have to wash your sheets.)
First, the hormones.
HORMONES AND SEX
The endocrine system is our chemical communications system that produces hormones or messengers in the body. Think of them as the messengers who shape the very narrative of our well-being, controlling our blood sugar, our energy levels, our stress response, our sleep schedule and even our fertility. They are the town criers of our bodies, telling us when we are hungry, when we are full, when we are sleepy and, most importantly to my clients like Carla and Dan, when we are horny.
They are key players in sexual function. Arousal? It all depends on hormones such as testosterone and estrogen, among numerous others. Libido? Hormones. Erections? Hormones. Lubrication? Hormones. Pleasure? Say it with me: hormones!
While it isn’t essential for the layperson to grasp every hormone’s complex function in the body or the bedroom in order to gain a little mastery over them, what’s important to grasp here is how critical they are to great sex, and how much control we really do have in aiding them in their goals.
Ancient Chinese medicine awoke to this reality long before Western medicine took notice, observing hormonal balance as the continual interaction between yin and yang. Yin and yang are the way of heaven and earth, through which one can understand all phenomena in the universe, including sex. Yin is the cool, feminine dampness of a winter night. It is the earth. Yang is the hot, masculine scorching of a summer day. It is the heavens. Heaven and earth became disconnected in us, but in sex, yin and yang essences merge once again between us and within us.
Please note that even though I’m using feminine and masculine here in line with the way traditional Chinese medicine (TCM) does, we all contain yin and yang within each of us. For this reason, Chinese medicine also has a unique advantage in treating and aiding everyone, including the gender fluid, because it focuses on how these elements differ in the individual and can be calibrated within us, no matter our identity or orientation. (For the sake of presenting medical research, I’ll use the terms “male and female bodies” to refer to subjects’ born biological status. This is important in understanding the working force of hormones within the body on the biomedical level, which, again, can be calibrated based on the individual.)
The continual interaction between yin and yang can also be observed via modern science through the complex interplay of hormones. We see it in the monthly temperature changes that accompany menstruation, which cycle through a cool yin phase at the month’s outset, culminating during ovulation, where yin transforms to hot yang, bringing basal body temperatures higher for the remainder of the month. In medical terms, estrogens and androgens also dance to enhance sexual arousal, peaking at ovulation and at the follicular phase of the menstrual cycle.
Hormonal balance is undoubtedly connected with great sex. For example, optimal testosterone means stronger erections in males and easier, more satisfying orgasms in females. Scientific research now helps us understand how we can enhance this relationship for increased sexual satisfaction. For instance, we can naturally optimize testosterone levels through diet, weight training, walking and other activities, as I’ll discuss later in this book.
Testosterone is produced by the testes, the ovaries and also by the adrenal glands, which sit right on top of the kidneys. In TCM, the kidneys are understood to be the root of the essence, with male essence being sperm and female essence being menses. The kidneys, then, are thought to be at the center of sexual and reproductive health.
Males generally have higher testosterone than females. This is a very important physiological difference, as it affects a number of sexual features including libido. However, often misunderstood is that estrogen is also very important in males, who have an enzyme, aromatase, which converts testosterone to estradiol, a form of estrogen. Again, optimal estrogen is also associated in males with better and more sex, higher libido, improved ejaculation and orgasm and more night-time erections. This is because estrogen is needed to trigger the pituitary gland to release gonadotropins—hormones that stimulate the activity of the testes. It is also a major player in male fertility.
That said, optimal levels of androgens and estrogens are different for males and females. In relation to great sex, males do better with higher androgen levels and lower estrogen levels, while for females it is the opposite.
Of note, there is a difference between total testosterone and free testosterone. Most testosterone in the bloodstream is bound to a protein called sex-hormone binding globulin (SHBG). The remaining 2% is free and available for our bodies to use.
Adequate free testosterone is important because it improves memory, mathematical reasoning and cognitive ability. It also increases muscle mass. Low androgen levels increase risk of cardiovascular disease and insulin resistance. Improved testosterone levels can increase one’s sense of well-being. Males with low free testosterone commonly complain of loss of libido, dysphoria (a state of unease and dissatisfaction with life), fatigue, irritability and depression. They also deal with weaker erections. These symptoms overlap with signs and symptoms of major depression. There is a significant inverse correlation between bioavailable testosterone and depression score in elderly males.
Both testosterone and estradiol have been shown to be important for female sexual desire. In females, estrogen supplementation typically increases libido, with a two-day lag, while progesterone consistently reduces it. However, in normal human levels, progesterone facilitates female sexual behavior.
Progesterone therapy has been used to control libido in felony sex offenders. However, in typical levels present in the body, it actually enhances masculine sexuality, stimulating sex behaviors.
Growth hormone and prolactin are not sex hormones per se, but they play a role in everyone’s sexual function. Prolactin is a hormone associated with milk production in females but is also produced by males. Levels increase following orgasm in everyone and may affect subsequent arousal following orgasm. Prolactin is also believed to exert influence on erectile strength, and genital sexual response. High prolactin is associated with hypogonadism and lower arousal across the board.
Low prolactin levels are associated with reduced erectile function, sexual satisfaction, and reduced quality of orgasm in males. In females, elevated prolactin levels were associated with depressive symptoms and reduced sexual desire, arousal, lubrication, orgasm and sexual satisfaction.[3]
As males age, and body fat increases, testosterone and DHEA (dehydroepiandrosterone) levels fall, while LH (luteinizing hormone), FSH (follicle-stimulating hormone) and SHBG (sex hormone-binding globulin) levels increase.[4]Smoking, age and obesity all affect sex hormones. Cigarette smokers have higher levels of DHEA, DHEAS and cortisol levels which, when in abundance, can wreak havoc. Alcohol consumption also increases cortisol levels to negative affect.
Diabetes, Insulin and Sex
A bit more about the effect of diabetes on our sexual function: Humans knew thousands of years ago that having diabetes caused ineptitude in the bedroom. Medieval Persian writer Avicenna wrote about diabetes in The Canon of Medicine (c.1025), describing “abnormal appetite, the collapse of sexual functions and the sweet taste of diabetic urine.” Insulin is a hormone which allows our cells to utilize sugar, but, in the case of diabetes, the body is either resistant to it (Type 2 diabetes) or doesn’t produce it (Type 1).
Wasting and Thirsting Disorder, as diabetes is called in TCM, is understood as an extremely deficient or blocked yin. Adequate yin substance is essential to fill the vessels of sexuality. For the numerous people with diabetes, this problem of yin causes sexual complaints. Diabetic patients have lower levels of sexual desire, sexual arousal, have sex less and less sexual satisfaction. Diabetics also have higher risk of erectile dysfunction. Those with the worst control over blood glucose levels have the most severe problems.[5]
One of the reasons diabetes affects sexual function is due to its damage of blood vessels, including those leading to the penis, clitoris and vagina. Diabetes and insulin resistance interferes with both nitric oxide and testosterone production.[6] Blood flow is essential for pleasure and function in all of us. To make things worse, diabetes injures nerves. As diabetic damage occurs, nerves leading to and from the genitals lose their ability to send those crucial signals of pleasure and arousal. This, too, has a remedy: Diet can drastically improve Type 2 diabetes and its sexual side effects.
Serotonin and Dopamine
There are a few additional, critical chemical messengers involved in our sexual health. Serotonin is a neurohormone produced by our bodies which helps us to feel a sense of well-being. When injected in certain parts of the brain, serotonin will delay ejaculation, while in other parts of the brain, it will cause ejaculation to occur. In general though, increased serotonin will prolong the time between erection and ejaculation, which is why it is sometimes used as a treatment for premature ejaculation.
The pharmaceutical class of antidepressants, selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRI’s) increase the availability of serotonin to improve mood. For this reason, SSRI’s can reduce libido. Like serotonin, dopamine stimulation can cause ejaculation to occur, and certain classes of drugs that block certain dopamine receptors make ejaculation difficult or impossible. Other types of dopamine interference can cause premature ejaculation.
The level of one hormone influences levels of other hormones, so when they are out of balance, this can have a global effect on the body and hence, our sexuality. Hormones are rarely out of balance in isolation. For example, when we see unbalanced testosterone, we usually see unbalanced DHEA, estradiol, and vitamin D, among others, which is part of something called multiple hormonal dysregulation.
These hormones and chemical components should be acknowledged, tended to and fed well, and there is scientific research to show us how to do this effectively. In turn, with yin and yang in balance, sex, my friend, is a heavenly delight.
[1] Ren Y, Yang X, Zhang Y, Wang Y, Li X. (2016). Effects and mechanisms of acupuncture and moxibustion on reproductive endocrine function in male rats with partial androgen deficiency. Acupunct Med. 2016;34(2):136-143.
[2] Fu H, Sun J, Tan Y, et al. (2018). Effects of acupuncture on the levels of serum estradiol and pituitary estrogen receptor beta in a rat model of induced super ovulation. Life Sci. 2018;197:109-113.
[3] Krysiak, R., Drosdzol-Cop, A., Skrzypulec-Plinta, V., & Okopien, B. (2016). Sexual function and depressive symptoms in young women with elevated macroprolactin content: a pilot study. Endocrine, 53(1), 291–298.
[4] Araujo, A. B., & Wittert, G. A. (2011). Endocrinology of the aging male. Best practice & research. Clinical endocrinology & metabolism, 25(2), 303–319.
[5] Anwar, Z., Sinha, V., Mitra, S., Mishra, A. K., Ansari, M. H., Bharti, A., Kumar, V., & Nigam, A. K. (2017). Erectile Dysfunction: An Underestimated Presentation in Patients with Diabetes Mellitus. Indian journal of psychological medicine, 39(5), 600–604.
[6] Knoblovits, P. , Costanzo, P. R., Valzacchi, G. J., Gueglio, G. , Layus, A. O., Kozak, A. E., Balzaretti, M. I. and Litwak, L. E. (2010), Erectile Dysfunction, Obesity, Insulin Resistance, and Their Relationship With Testosterone Levels in Eugonadal Patients in an Andrology Clinic Setting. Journal of Andrology, 31: 263-270.