Self-help & Self-improvement

Bulimia Sucks!


This book will launch on Feb 5, 2021. Currently, only those with the link can see it. 🔒

Bulimia Sucks! an inspiring, practical book written to empower people to break through the barriers stopping them from taking that first step to freedom from bulimia. With astounding new approaches and techniques, to learn how to reprogram their mind to freedom.

In the book, I teach astounding new approaches to reprogram the mind and discover how to:
• Stop bingeing & purging, abusing laxatives, diuretics & compulsive exercising.
• Breakthrough negative thoughts, feelings, triggers and urges.
• Improve negative body image & reach and maintain an ideal weight without starvation.
• Stay motivated to propel them into your bulimia free future.
Personally suffering 15 years of horrific bulimia and anorexia, and now 25 years entirely free from both. Thanks to various therapist’s help, I decided that I would like to help others.
So, 21 years ago, I trained as a psychotherapist, hypnotherapist, and NLP practitioner. I then continued to train in many other therapy areas, one being an eating disorder therapist. Helping my clients overcome their anorexia and bulimia completely.

This subject needs to be shouted from the rooftops! In the UK it's a bit cold out there for such an event .... so, here we are....




It all began with one breath. A simple sentence! As easy as that.

Growing up, I was always a skinny little rake, without the spikes. As a teenager, I started to fill out slightly, and some would say, "developing into a shapely woman!" But it was a stark, dark change for me.

One fateful day, I invited a friend over for dinner. We finished our exceptional cuisine delight and, as girls do, we discussed our weight, calories, food, and everything to do with our non-existent weight issues.

Suddenly, her voice rose excitedly. "Did you know if you were to eat a Mars bar, then made yourself sick afterward, you won't put any weight on?" For me, it wasn't just a light bulb moment but a luminous multi-colored neon strip light moment. What an ingenious idea! I grabbed it with not only both hands but also my feet and ran with it as fast as I could!

Even Princess Diana stated in transcripts of tapes published by The Daily Mail, "The bulimia started the week after we got engaged [and would take nearly a decade to overcome]. My husband [Prince Charles] put his hand on my waistline and said: 'Oh, a bit chubby here, aren't we?' and that triggered off something in me."

Oh, how powerful one suggestion can be!

In this first step on your pathway to freedom from bulimia, you'll be:

•    Learning the causes of why you're bingeing and making yourself sick.

•    Understanding what your functions or "needs" of your life-threatening destructive behavior are.

•    Understand how you can transform your focus and begin to visualize how you want to be in your future to freedom.

•    Also, discover how you can start to reprogram your incredible mind to transform your negative thinking to positive, powerful motivational thoughts and feelings.

As you work through this book, rather than flying through each step, I want you to make deliberate, specific slow steps and learn how you're going to completely break all the chains linked to why you have bulimia.

There's a lot to learn, so let's begin…


When I had bulimia, this was a question that baffled me. Why on earth would I make myself sick? I must be crazy. I was so confused and didn't believe that I could stop this pattern.

But let me tell you here and now, YOU CAN STOP YOUR BINGEING AND MAKING YOURSELF SICK; it's true. I haven't binged or made myself sick for 25 years, and with the right tools, you too can change now.

If only recovery were that simple!


There are multiple reasons why you've ended up down this dark, scary path, and you're now going to begin to learn what has kept you hooked into this destructive behavior.

As you deprive yourself of food, the bingeing and purging cycle begins, the causes and the multitude of feelings connected to these causes are put on hold. As you binge and purge, providing some sort of fleeting pleasure and instant relief or release, no longer feeling guilty for having the food in the stomach, some say they're on a high and feel relaxed. Unfortunately, this is only temporary because then the guilt, secrecy, and physical side-effects begin to build up again. The exhausting painful patterns begin all over again. It's like being on a roundabout that's spinning so fast; you can't see a way off and round and round you go.

If it were that simple just to stop bingeing and purging, then you would have done this already! But, usually, many factors in a person's life are preventing them from stopping now.





You may have an idea of why you have bulimia, or maybe you don't. My brain was one complete muddle of confusion as to why I was engulfed in this uncontrollable behavior. Having a clearer understanding of how you've gotten there will be so incredibly powerful in helping you to clearly see how you're going to break all your negative habits and patterns.

Let's begin by looking at the reasons why people develop bulimia.


Most people with bulimia have been preoccupied with dieting and food for many years. Their binge and purging behavior may be triggered by trauma from abuse. From multiple studies taken, there's a higher possibility that if you've been sexually abused when young that you'll develop bulimia. And with that comes colossal feelings of shame, guilt, and need for a way to numb the emotions connected to that memory. It could be a way to punish themselves, or it could be a kind of comfort or protection, for when someone has been sexually abused, the world can then feel unsafe.

When people are sexually abused, their boundaries of themselves have been violated, which can have a detrimental effect on their eating habits and body image. This also can have such an immense impact that it can become challenging to recognize feelings of hunger, tiredness, or sexuality.

So, turning to food is a way to cope with their feelings and to release a multitude of negative emotions that actually have nothing to do with real hunger. The bubbling confusion and uncertainty about themselves brings their focus to food.

You may feel a loss of control over your safety. With bulimia, this pattern of behavior will be providing relief from distressing feelings, unconsciously regaining feelings of control and safety. Your intention isn't the pain but the good emotions or pleasure that you get from this. You're looking for ways to relieve the pain by bingeing and purging to get that "high" or pleasure afterward.

As you read in the memoir, I was sexually abused when I was young. The multitude of feelings I had in connection with the abuse was buried so deep within me, and this pattern continued for 25 years until I was ready to face it, talk about it, work through all the beastly feelings, and then let them go.


What is body image?

 Body image is identified as your thoughts, opinions, and attitude about how you look. It's sadly not uncommon to dislike your appearance, and people who develop bulimia are more likely to report higher levels of body image dissatisfaction.

A negative body image is a distorted view of your shape. Plus, along with this comes all those self-destructive feelings of self-consciousness, shame, and anxiety.

A positive body image is a realistic view of how your body looks. Feeling comfortable and confident about what you see, accepting your natural body size and shape.




What is body dysmorphia?

Body dysmorphia, also known as imagined ugliness, in which your imagination, as powerful as it is, goes wild and becomes extremely confused with how you look. You could have a minor flaw, say a pimple, that you embellish into an ugly beast, then scratch it to increase the ugliness.

Body dysmorphia can also include:

Continually asking for reassurance on your looks

Changing your clothes constantly

Becoming obsessed with grooming yourself

It can become so extreme and distressing with the flow of never-ending feelings of shamefulness that you may not want to be seen by anyone.

Many people have areas of their body they aren't happy with. But research shows that approximately 80% of people with body dysmorphia report they have experienced suicidal thoughts, which is 10 to 25 times more intense than the general population.


Many people with bulimia suffer from body dysmorphia symptoms. Usually, the focus is on the body weight or the shape and checking their body for any flaws, intensifying the negative feelings and thoughts you may have about your weight and shape.

I remember when I was in the depths of bulimia, every time I looked in the mirror, all I could see was a bulbous fat lump! This wasn't true; I was skinny and totally distorted what was in that mirror. So, for your recovery, it's essential that you now stop looking in any mirror. They're doing you so much harm and will hinder your fantastic vision of recovery.




What is low self-esteem?

Having bulimia is terrible enough, but along with this comes low self-esteem, which is struggling with:

Feelings of Inadequacy

Looking at faults in your character

Feeling incompetent in some way

Feeling unlovable

Low self-esteem causes you to think and feel as if you aren't good enough in how you look, how you perform at school or work, and how you relate with friends and family. It's as if your life had no value and purpose.

Do you think you have low self-esteem?

If you do, it will take time to change; these negative thoughts and feelings may have been there for a long time.

Although, if you're still starving yourself, your brain and your body will be malnourished, and you'll find it difficult to change your thoughts and feelings connected to low self-esteem rationally.

Working through the steps in this book, you can begin to learn how to value and believe in yourself, and appreciate YOU for the incredibly wonderful, beautiful individual you are.



Oh yes, you're surrounded by stunning slim models with the ideal body everywhere you look, in magazines, posters, TV, and social media.

You're influenced to think that these women are of average weight and body shape, and this is where we get the belief that being thin is going to make us popular, happy, and successful. But alas, this is an unrealistic view of life. These images become unconsciously seeded into our minds, even though part of us knows that the images are inaccurate.

A study of Fiji islanders is a great example:

In 1995, the island of Fiji had no reported cases of bulimia, anorexia, or weight problems because they had no access to television, which was marvelous. But once the TV was introduced and after three years of watching American and British TV shows, more than two-thirds of Fijian girls had learned how to diet, and three-quarters of them felt "too fat." Such negative learning for these girls is a perfect example of the life we live in.

So much research has shown that this exposure leads us to body dissatisfaction and striving to replicate the unrealistic slim models, which then causes eating disorders, including bulimia.



Many of my clients discuss how they were bullied when younger, particularly as teenagers. With hormones floating where they shouldn't, they can often become extremely conscious of their physical appearance.

Consequently, if they are bullied about their weight, size, shape, or looks, huge painful emotions can sweep in, causing feelings of shame and sadness and leading to further unruly thinking, such as insecurities, low self-esteem, body image, and depression.

Nowadays, with so much social media, teenage discussion, and peer pressure to look a certain way, to fit into what they think others find appropriate, they feel they must take action, and in steps the big B - bulimia.

Being bullied can bring on feelings of being out of control. Developing bulimia gives them a sense of control back, so at least they can control one area of their life, even if it's detrimental.


Dieting is one of the most influential risk factors for developing bulimia. It affects your brain, influencing mood changes, increasing the preoccupation around food and negativity around body issues. Focusing on dieting can become a great escape to what? Oh, yes, to what you are genuinely thinking and feeling.

If you want to fail… then diet!

Any thoughts of dieting must stop; diets don't work. Some lose weight dieting. But they end up putting all the weight back on and usually with extra rolls of fat also.

That's because they haven't addressed the real reasons why they were reaching out for foods when they weren't hungry. Plus, they haven't explored the unconscious triggers, links, and patterns of their real thoughts and feelings.




 Stress is how your body responds to different pressures from a situation. Too much stress can affect your attitude, body, and relationships and can vary from person to person, making you feel anxious or grouchy.

It could be connected to a significant change in your life, such as:

·        A change of job

·        Move to a new home

·        Maybe a relationship issue like rejection from a boyfriend or divorce

·        Death of a loved one 

Significant changes like these could increase the risk of developing bulimia.

For me, apart from my abuse when younger, I believe one of the reasons I developed bulimia was because at the age of 17, I was released from the strict but relatively stress-free confinements of boarding school. I was then suddenly faced with the stress of coping on my own in the big overwhelming lonely town called London. My mother, remarried, sold our family home and moved to another area.

For more information on stress, see Step 5.



Are you perfect? I hope not!

Perfectionism is setting unrealistically high expectations for yourself, which is difficult ever to ever achieve because, no matter, it could always be better. And if you haven't achieved this goal, then, here comes your evil voice to beat you up. If you try to be consistently perfect and portray an ideal image, you cannot be genuine; you can't be true to yourself.

Focusing on assignments, work deadlines become overwhelming as you create pressure on yourself to achieve and make perfect. And when this isn't met, the great FoF comes in – Fear of Failure.

If a perfectionist is trying to lose weight to have that "perfect" appearance, whatever that may be—but I don't think it actually exists—the pressure piles up. If they aren't achieving their weight loss goals and put on a pound, then in swarms the huge FoF. The feelings of low self-worth engulf them, which then can lead to:

·        Compulsively exercising

·        An increase in laxatives or diuretics

·        Counting calories

·        Bingeing and purging



Oh, we love our families, or do we! Unfortunately, we can learn their harmful habits and behaviors. Studies of families have found that if a parent or sibling has an eating disorder, this can increase a person's risk of developing an eating disorder also.


If they're forever discussing their weight, size, and shape or over-exercising, the child will learn this is acceptable behavior and follow likewise.


If they're judgmental about others and their weight, the child will learn then that how they look in their body is a measure of self-worth, and they could worry that they too will be judged or worry about a poor body image.

If they're overprotective and wanting perfection, they'll put pressure on the child, having high expectations for a huge achievement


Then if they can't live up to all that's wanted from them and they can't control all they need to do. The FoF slithers in, and they may look elsewhere for something that they can control, which is dieting. That could lead them to binge and purging. And the whole bulimia cycle begins.

Troubling issues within the family may also be the cause of bulimia; if a person is from a family with many negative behaviors, such as alcoholism, drug addiction, marital fighting, divorce, or domestic violence, these could contribute to bulimia.

Having looked at the causes of your bulimia, let's begin to address what the function of your bulimia is.


By this, I mean the purpose, need, reward, or reason for behaving the way you do. So, for the sake of simplicity, I call it the function of your bulimia.

Once you begin to understand why your bulimia is serving a function, it becomes much easier for you to know why it's so difficult to stop the patterns of behavior—and how you're going to begin to learn to replace this function positively.


Let's start to break down your pattern of behavior. I want you to tune into and specifically think about how to identify the possible functions that bingeing and purging serve.

To begin with, look through the list below and see if you identify with any?

It helps me to cope with an enormous amount of negative thoughts and feelings.

It's a way to punish me for reasons, only I [JP2] may know.

It's an attempt toward perfectionism.

It's my only way to gain comfort in my life.

It's the only way I can have any kind of control in my life.

It's a way to control my weight.

It's a way to distract me from the stress of daily life.

It's my way to shout for "Help."

It's a way to relieve boredom.

It's a way to suppress traumatic memories or feelings of anger or anxiety.

It's a way to gain relief or some sort of freedom.

It's a way for me to rebel against the "Good Girl."

Great! Having read through the list, now make up a list of your personal functions of your bulimia.

Complete the FUNCTIONS OF YOUR BULIMIA TABLE in Step 1, in your workbook. Then zip back here and continue. Otherwise, grab your notebook and list the functions of your bulimia.

Well done, but you may be surprised that your bulimia isn't about weight loss so much, even though that's a significant concern. So much more is going on that's keeping you clutching to this pattern of behavior.

Thinking about your list and creating your own functions, you can then become:

•    More aware of your eating triggers, patterns, and habits.

•    More aware of your values and desires.

Now that you've written out your detailed list, here's the exciting part; we need to reevaluate the function causing your bulimia.

Thinking about your list of "functions" now, write down what you could do differently to begin to satisfy these.

Complete the TIME TO CHANGE TABLE in Step 1, in your workbook. Then zip back here and continue. Otherwise, grab your notebook and list:



Fantastic, now you have a clearer idea of what your functions are and how you can begin to replace them. We'll be working with those functions throughout the book.

So, let's continue on your exciting new journey of changing the functions of negative thoughts, feelings, and limiting beliefs that have led you down this dark tunnel. Into new positive ways of thinking, feeling and learning about your incredibly powerful mind and how you can begin to use it to change how you think and feel.



As an eating disorder therapist, what I've learned over the last twenty-one years is how incredibly powerful your mind is, and this is what I am going to teach you. So you can truly get the help you need to begin to take back control of your life.

Let's learn about your incredible mind. Actually, you have two minds: your conscious mind and your unconscious mind. They both have different functions, so let's look further at the differences between the two.

Your conscious mind?

Your conscious mind is your everyday thinking mind, your logical mind. It constantly whispers in your ear, saying, "You’ve had such a stressful day. Go ahead and binge and purge; you’ll feel better afterward.” It consists of 10–12% of your mental capacity.

It’s the mind that takes care of physical reality life and is governed by the senses such as sight, hearing, touch, taste, and smell.

Your unconscious mind?

Your unconscious mind is when you’re on autopilot. It keeps you breathing regularly, beats your heart for you, and does everything you don’t think about to keep you functioning healthily.

Your unconscious mind is always listening and is like the bus driver of your mind.

Your unconscious mind consists of 88–90% of your total mental capacity, which registers everything. You have approximately 60,000 different thoughts every day. Your unconscious mind remembers everything, but your conscious mind doesn’t.

Your unconscious mind always tries to help and protect you. It learns lessons quickly from different experiences you may have. For example:

When I was young, consistently being told I was stupid, my unconscious mind learned from this. It then began to help me to think like this and believe that I wasn’t smart.

Your habits and thinking

Your unconscious mind stores all your habits of thinking and acting, memorizing all your comfort zones and works on keeping you in this bulimic pattern.

So, all the various techniques I’ll be giving you in this book will help reprogram your powerful unconscious mind. You can change your old habits and patterns and focus on how you want to be positive in the future.

Imagine your conscious mind as the garden where you plant seeds. And your unconscious mind is where the seeds flourish if nurtured and fertilized.

So rather than planting bindweed, you can begin to plant poppy seeds that will flourish into spectacular huge red poppies.



When you think of the specific process of how you do anything, you’ll see it has many different factors called submodalities. These are the building blocks of how you think, feel and react to certain things. It’s taken from the fantastic therapy called NLP (Neuro Linguist Programming), which is how you can reprogram your unconscious mind to empower yourself to begin to change the way you think and feel.

Learn to master your mind and negative behaviors, including creating a new healthy self-image and shifting your focus into a new healthier you.

NLP is based on the techniques created by Richard Bandler and John Grinder.

It’s time to start being aware of how and what you’re thinking, what you’re saying to yourself that sweeps you into the harmful thinking that then drives you to binge.

Once you begin to notice all those thoughts rattling around in your brain, then you can start to change the way you’re thinking.

When we think, there’s a pattern to our thoughts, we either:

Think in pictures

Think in words

Think in feelings

Think in tastes or smells

Most people think in both words and pictures; maybe for you, one is more dominant than the other.

If I were to ask you how you bought this book, did you skip into a book shop and make the purchase there, or did you hop onto (but not literally) your computer or phone to make the purchase?

When you think about that, there will be different elements or steps of how you found your way to the answer…

You would have had:

•    An image of you hopping or skipping to the shop to make the purchase.

•    A verbalization of where you bought it.

•    A feeling about buying it, maybe an exciting feeling?

Let me explain further what submodalities are and how they’re going to help you

Your submodalities are the representations of how you view your world. They form the basic building blocks of how you think, feel, and react to certain things; people or events. We’ll be working with submodalities throughout the book, so listen up…

Submodalities are made up of five different types; corresponding to the five senses:

Visual Submodalities (Pictures)


It’s the picture you have in your mind, which could be:

·        A movie or still picture?

·        In panorama or a framed picture?

·        In color or black and white?

·        How bright/dim is the picture?

·        Focused or blurred?

·        Associated or disassociated?

·        What’s the size of the picture?

·        Close up or far away?

·        Are you in the picture or looking at the picture?

Auditory submodalities (Things you hear)


If you hear a sound in your mind, possible characteristics include:

·        Words or sounds

·        Tone

·        Constant or intermittent

·        Loud or quiet

·        High or low pitch

·        Timbre

·        Duration

·        The direction of the voice

·        Tempo

Kinesthetic submodalities (Feelings and sensations)


This is your feelings and sensations; they may include:

Location - where it is in the body




Temperature - Hot or cold

Texture – rough or smooth


Constant or intermittent

Still or moving

Steady or intermittent


Breathing rate


Gustatory and Olfactory Submodalities (Taste and Smell)


·        Sweet

·        Sour

·        Aroma – strength

·        Bitter

·        Fragrance

·        How strong is the smell?

Are you still listening up? Because you’ll be zipping back to this submodalities page often as you work through some of the techniques in this book.



A real key to helping you to take back control of your life is with another NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) technique called anchoring. Anchoring is the connection between a trigger and a change of mood.

Your life has been affected by anchors all your life, even though you haven’t created them intentionally. For example: If someone were to smell freshly mowed lawn, that could remind them of when they were young child, a summer day, and Dad had just cut the lawn. Or when you hear a specific song, it reminds you of a past experience or person. These are NLP anchors.

So, whether the anchor is positive or negative and where you are now, you have many problematic anchors that are creating negative responses. Still, the good news is that they work instantly and don’t involve rational thinking. You could see, think, or hear about something, and then, automatically, your mood changes, whether you want it to or not. But positive anchors evoke good, pleasant feelings.

Some of the techniques throughout the book will include anchoring, which will be so powerful for you to use when you aren’t feeling so positive about yourself.


How you can use anchoring and submodalities positively

You’re going to begin by creating a new positive goal of how you want to be in the future. You need the vision to focus on, and, as Tony Robbins says:

“The most important thing that’ll drive you is your ability just to sit down and create a vision of how you want to be and each day to live it in your mind. That simple visualization or, if you don’t think you make pictures, that simple sense of feeling what you’re going to feel like when you’ve achieved your goals, when you are living in the body that you deserve. That’s what’ll give you the drive, that’s what’ll give you the power.”

By reinforcing positive self-images with powerful, positive feelings, you start to teach your brain that you want to change to bring you more things that make you feel better, even enjoyable. If you don’t believe me, try this out for yourself!

Here we go, your next step to motivate you to begin reprograming your mind to start now to thinking differently and positively:



Now it’s time to use your anchoring and submodalities skills, so here’s a simple but incredibly powerful technique that will reprogram your unconscious mind to begin your pathway to freedom.

Read through all the steps, so you know where you’re going with this. I don’t want you to get lost!

First, imagine how you like to be in the future free from bulimia. What would you be doing, thinking, feeling, saying to yourself? Happy, healthy, excited, free.

Look at all the details of how you would look; standing upright, feeling confident, smiling, positive, and happy.

Now make this image as powerful as possible now to use your new skill of changing the submodalities of your image. Go through your list of submodalities and make this picture as empowering as possible, changing it as follows:

·        Make the colors brighter and bolder.

·        Make the image life-size or bigger, if possible.

·        What would you be saying to yourself? “I’m finally happy and living the life I’ve always dreamt of.”

·        How would you be feeling? Motivated, empowered, excited for your new future.

Change the movie if you need to, so it’s the most empowering movie you’ve ever watched.

Now, step into this incredible new you, so you’re actually in the picture, looking through your own eyes, feel what you’ll be feeling not to have binged for months or even years. What are you saying to yourself? Something like, “I'm free and so proud of myself." Now intensify the feelings, making them as big and powerful as possible.

5.  Now step out of your new image, fantastic, how good did that feel? Brilliant! You can jump right back in there as often as you wish.

You did it! I want you to step into THE NEW YOU every morning and evening. Then periodically throughout each day. Repetition is the key to your achievement. You’re reprogramming your unconscious mind, reminding it of the positive direction you want to go in, and it will help you to focus on it.

If you don't believe me, try it out. What have you got to lose? It works. You’ll start to see a new empowered you. It will help you incredibly to begin to change.

Begin now; it's so exciting to see how you’re going to look and feel in this new empowered YOU.

Video Demonstration Link:



Paula Abdul struggled with bulimia for 15 years, and through therapy, she learned that this was her way of suppressing her feelings. Her weight was linked to her self-worth, and dealing with her difficult emotions helped her recover from bulimia.

She says: "Battling bulimia has been like war on my body. Me and my body have been on two separate sides. We've never, until recently, been on the same side. I felt nervous and out of control, and all I could think about was food. Food numbed the fear and anxiety. I'd eat and then run to the bathroom. I thought, ‘God I'm not perfect. I'm going to disappoint people.’ It became a living hell for me. Whether I was sticking my head in the toilet or exercising for hours a day, I was spitting out the food – and the feelings."


Now is the time you can start to feel proud of yourself for having read through and taken the vital first action steps to begin to slow down your merry-go-round and change the way you’re thinking and feeling about yourself and where you are.

·        Having read the causes of what has brought you down this destructive path, you may be able to identify with many different areas that have caused you to develop bulimia. But I don't suppose you thought it would become this addictive.

·        Now that you have a clearer picture of why you’re bingeing and purging and learning from your own specific list of your unconscious functions behind your behaviors, you’ll start to open up to ideas of how you can change positively.

·        As you start to acknowledge the importance of beginning to learn to eat like a normal person, your body will reward you in so many positive ways; you won't recognize yourself!

·        Practice stepping into "The New You."

Now you have a new positive picture of how you want to be in the future. Remember, repetition is critical. Each time you jump into this new you, you’re reinforcing how you want to be in the future.

Hurrah, you’ve finished Step 1! I'm so proud of you already. You’re opening up to the possibility there’s a life without the chains of bulimia.

Are you ready? Do you want some motivation? It’s time to flip that page and move on… wahooooo… here we go.

 [JP1]If this is your quote, add your name.

 [JP2]If this means you the author, leave. If it mean the reader, change to I.

 [JP3]Add source.

About the author

Kate is the author of Bulimia Sucks! It is an inspiring, practical book written to empower people to break through the barriers stopping them from taking that first step to freedom from bulimia. With astounding new approaches and techniques, to learn how to reprogram their mind to freedom. view profile

Published on January 03, 2021

Published by

60000 words

Genre: Self-help & Self-improvement