A collection of poems.
Introduction
This book is for those who have loved and lost.
For the ones who carry grief in their hearts,
For those who have made peace with the demons,
Or those who are still trying to find their way through it.
These words are for the abandoned, the betrayed, the forgotten.
For those who have reached for love, only to watch it slip away.
For those who whisper into the void, wondering if it ever listens.
This is a journey through grief and ruin,
Through devotion and the wreckage it leaves behind.
Through sorrow, survival, and the search for something more.
If you have ever been broken,
If you have ever longed for something just out of reach,
If you have ever wondered whether healing is possible—
Then these words are for you.
May you find something here that speaks to your soul.
A collection of poems.
Introduction
This book is for those who have loved and lost.
For the ones who carry grief in their hearts,
For those who have made peace with the demons,
Or those who are still trying to find their way through it.
These words are for the abandoned, the betrayed, the forgotten.
For those who have reached for love, only to watch it slip away.
For those who whisper into the void, wondering if it ever listens.
This is a journey through grief and ruin,
Through devotion and the wreckage it leaves behind.
Through sorrow, survival, and the search for something more.
If you have ever been broken,
If you have ever longed for something just out of reach,
If you have ever wondered whether healing is possible—
Then these words are for you.
May you find something here that speaks to your soul.
Part I:
Before there was loss, there was love.
Before there was silence, there were voices.
But love does not always last,
And voices are destined to fade.
This is where my story begins—
In the absence of those who should have stayed.
Echoes of a Nightmare
I lost my parents to the grasp of time,
Their affection, a fading echo, a hollow chime.
Left behind, too young to understand,
Abandoned, a shadow in their unsteady hands.
At three, I learned how love can break,
How promises shatter, how hearts forsake.
They never looked back; no fight, no plea,
Just a quiet goodbye, leaving nothing of me.
I waited for years in a world unknown,
A child adrift, without a home.
Through crowded houses and fleeting care,
I searched for faces that were never there.
No longer will I carry the blame,
For their departure, their dying flame.
It haunts me still, when I gaze at my kin—
How could they leave us the way that they did?
I longed for no one but them in my life,
Their absence cut deep, a blade, a knife.
The years stretched long; I struggled to mend,
Living with wounds that refused to bend.
There must have been an attachment I once knew,
Maybe fleeting moments when their words rang true.
NaĂŻve and hopeful, a child of dreams,
Before creation unraveled at its fragile seams.
I’ve sought for answers, though none will suffice—
Their silence remains, a dagger of ice.
Perhaps I should thank them for making me strong,
For teaching me how to survive the wrong.
I built my own warmth from ashes and stone,
For no hand was offered—I stood alone.
But a part of me aches, a part of me yearns,
To
unlearn
this
aching,
to watch it all burn.
Now love finds me, yet I avert its gaze,
For a fragmented heart cannot escape its maze.
How can I give wholly what’s shattered in shards,
A soul still imprisoned, behind its own guards?
Still, I dream of a dawn, a glimmer of light,
When this nightmare dissolves into the night.
I’ll awaken to find you standing near,
And all the shadows will disappear.
You’ll be by my side, and I’ll be by yours,
As the torment drifts beyond memory’s shores.
This existence of sorrow will fade like a stream,
And I’ll know at last—it was only a dream.
The Haunting Flame
Most days, the agony wraps itself around my soul,
A shadowed being, refusing to let go.
Just when I think the inferno is through,
It flares again—a ghost of you.
What you did to me lingers like a curse,
A wound eternal, each recollection rehearsed.
You ruined me, left wounds in my life,
A shattered mirror reflecting my strife.
I look around at all I have gained,
Lucky, they say, to have escaped the chained.
And yet, even in my sanctuary, you remain,
A demon that dances in my brain.
Do you think of me, as I think of you?
Does my image haunt, like shadows do?
Part of me hopes, when you close your eyes,
It is my face that rises beneath your skies.
But hatred twists its claws within,
For what you did, for what has been.
Darker still is the hate I bear,
For myself, for the silence, for the despair.
You stole everything—my innocence, my trust,
Left ashes where dreams once were lush.
I can never forget the shadow you cast,
A torment alive in the memories of the past.
I wonder, if fate had twisted a kinder thread,
If we had never met, would my skin have bled?
Would the light of my days burn brighter still,
Or would shadows find me, against my will?
I remember your eyes, so piercing and cold,
Twin abysses, where terror took hold.
Your gaze remains, chiseled in my mind,
A haunting reminder, a curse unkind.
You are the monster that lingers near,
A bloodthirsty vampire, feeding my fear.
But one day, this flame shall flicker and die,
And I will rise up, unshackled,
beneath
the
darkened
sky.
Losing Sight
I will never be the ideal child
You sought in your dreams, serene and mild.
Perfection is an illusion I cannot be,
For inside, I am ruins—fragility unseen.
I feel your gaze, heavy and cold,
Expecting more than this shattered mold.
I walk the edge where shadows call,
Unwilling to bow, to censor it all.
I won’t wear the mask of a docile soul,
Living by rules that swallow me whole.
I’ll carve my path, as jagged as stone,
Even if I walk it utterly alone.
I mirror you, each step, each turn,
Your fire, your chaos, your will to burn.
But when I do, it feels so wrong,
The same dance, yet a different song.
Remember, I am but a child still,
Even grown, I will falter at will.
Mistakes will tether me to this fight,
While he—the golden one—will shine so bright.
The other child, your chosen heir,
So perfect, pristine, beyond compare.
He will never wander, never stray,
He’ll walk the path in your perfect array.
He will never be wild, never lose sight,
He’ll be your salvation, your guiding light.
While I, the forgotten, drift in the dark,
A
shadow
cast,
a
faded
spark.
So good luck with the son who will never fail,
While I wear my flaws like a funeral veil.
I’m sorry I was never enough for you,
Never the reflection of what you knew.
I’m sorry I failed, for falling apart,
For the wild edges of my fractured heart.
But no more apologies will I recite—
For losing your love was losing sight.
The Last Plea
I sit alone in the stillness of my tomb,
Shrouded by shadows that cling to my room.
Far from the world that etched its scars,
I kneel beneath the watchful stars.
On trembling knees, I whisper your name,
Begging forgiveness, swallowed by shame.
One last chance is all I seek,
To prove myself before I’m weak.
Let the past be buried in the grave it deserves,
A place forgotten, where nothing stirs.
But let the weight of it stay with you,
For only you can bear its truth.
I crave rebirth with each new day,
To cast these sins and stains away.
A soul redeemed, in your light’s embrace,
A chance to step from this darkened space.
I know your devotion is a constant flame,
It burns through guilt, it sears through shame.
You do not wield my faults as knives,
But hold them still, to spare my life.
For this, I kneel in gratitude and fear,
Your mercy—both distant and near.
I try to mend what I have undone,
But my demons wrestle; they’ve already won.
How many chances have I betrayed,
Squandered words and promises made?
This time, I will not fail or flee,
I swear it on the life of me.
I am sorry for using your light as my guide,
Only when adrift in the dark, to hide.
I beg you now, as the quiet screams,
Lift me up from this well of dreams.
Give me the strength to walk once more,
To raise up from the mangled floor.
Accept my plea, show mercy divine,
And grant this wretched soul a sign.
One last chance is all I ask,
To prove my worth, to fulfill my task.
I am not bargaining, I am not contriving,
This is no ruse—I am surviving.
Hear my words
as
shadows
fall,
I offer my heart, my soul, my all.
The Weight of Hurt
It hurts when those meant to cherish you fade,
Their affection leaves you vacant and frayed.
It hurts when the ones you trust tear apart
The fragile seams of your battered heart.
It hurts when guilt claws deep at your chest,
A sickness whispering, “You are the jest.”
Every shadow seems to scream your name,
The weight of blame, an unending flame.
It hurts to see the ruins behind,
Families fractured, chances confined.
A trail of wreckage I dared not foresee,
Cast aside, punished for simply being me.
It hurts to carry this anger alone,
A tempest howling through marrow and bone.
To spend your life with a presence turned cold,
Cuffed to the fury, a grief uncontrolled.
It hurts to crave what will never arrive,
Arms to hold you, to keep you alive.
But the ones you long for, the solace you seek,
Turn their backs, leaving you weak.
The emptiness whispers, the silence grows loud,
A shroud of melancholy as dark as a cloud.
You reach for their hands, but they pull back in fear,
The absence of love, sharp as a spear.
How it hurts to weather this alone,
A shadow unwelcomed, a life overthrown.
Even in darkness, I whisper my plea—
A flicker of hope for what might someday be.
A Shadow’s Lament by Sheila Ruby is a touching and emotional collection of poems; when put together they reveal the bittersweet tale of the poet and her journey. It is a heartbreaking story of neglect, abandonment, abuse, heartache, love, and growth. You see into the author’s heart, mind, and soul with every line. Sheila Ruby has done her job on making me feel each line and verse. Reading this has deeply affected me emotionally and spiritually.
These poems are divided into four different parts, similar to chapters. Each one represents a segment of the poetic story.
The rhythm, rhyme and verse keeps you in tune with the emotions of each poem. The fear, loss, sorrow…all of it we feel along with the writer. Reading this book is like an act of lyrical empathy. And, this is how poetry should be. It’s akin to listening to your favorite album and feeling every song.
I love all of the poems in this collection. However my favorite is Before Your Throne, a bold affirmation of faith in God and his mercy. There is nothing offensive or off-putting in these poems; but often the emotions it conveys range from loss, heartbreak, fears, and sorrows.
At its core is a story of resilience through a life of pain, sorrow, and abandonment. This collection is a show of strength through turmoil. It reflects the horrors of life that we go through as well as a quest for love and acceptance. These poetic works also may encourage others who are going through tough times.
I detected no errors in this book, and the formatting was beautifully done with illustrations of flora interwoven throughout the pages. The poems are beautifully penned, and well formatted. If you enjoy poetry, you will love this book. I highly recommend it. Thus, I give it a full 5 out of 5 stars.